Crash Queens and Motor Babies

Surpassing the Guilt

When I woke up my head hurt like hell. I know I went out last night but dang, I must've had a lot of fun. I opened my eyes a little and noticed I was cuddling someone. It only took me a few seconds to figure out who I was laying next to, though. It was Gerard.

I really didn't remember what happened after we got to the club, but I remember a girl and that Gerard and I got really carried away. I'm guessing that Gerard passed out sometime last night because I think I remember carrying him upstairs. But how did I carry him up if I was wasted? Nothing made sense right now, to be honest.

Since I didn't want to wake up Gerard I just kept my arm around him while he slept. My head hurt so much I ended up planting my face into the pillow so the sun wouldn't hurt my head even more. Even though there were black curtains covering the two windows in the room, the sunlight passed right through them. I groaned in pain and shoved my face further into the pillow to try to block out the sun. When I moved, I felt Gerard start to squirm, too. I put the tan blanket over our heads as he began to wake up.

When he woke up he yawned, stretch himself out, and put his hands on his head. He rubbed his temples and groaned. After rubbing his temples for a while he stopped and put his hands to his sides again. When he started to turn over I didn't know what to do so I shut my eyes and pretended that I was still asleep.

"Fuck," he whispered and moved the blanket off of him, got up, and started moving around the room. "What did I do?! Holy shit, did we- I'm an idiot. I knew I shouldn't have drank, it's been six years since I quit... Ugh!"

He sighed in frustration an I decided to 'wake up' before he had a panic attack. I rolled around a little and he stopped moving and held his breath in. I took the blanket off of me and groaned. The groan was real pain, though, because my head still hurt like a motherfucker. I looked up and saw Gerard staring at me, his green eyes penetrating me.

"Gee? What did-" I looked around the room and raised one of my eyebrows. "Where are we?"

To be honest, I didn't know when or how we got here, but I had a feeling it had something to do with that girl.

Gerard just looked around the room wide eyed and looked back at me. "Frank, I don't know what happened last night, so I wouldn't be able to tell you. But... How did we get here if you didn't bring us here?"

I scooted on the bed so I was on the edge of it and dug the heels of my hands into my eyes. I looked up at him and shook my head, "I don't know."

He walked over to me, sat on the bed, and sighed. "Do you remember me when I was drunk?"

I did a one shoulder shrug, "Not really, no."

He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed in frustration. I looked over at him and saw him looking at the floor, his eyebrows furrowed and he was biting his lip. I didn't think, I just did what I thought was right when I put my head on his shoulder and rubbed his back a little. He looked at me and smiled. He kissed my nose and stood so he could go back to pacing.

"Well, we got to figure out what happened. Do you, um... Do you remember a girl, too?" He paused to look at me.

"Yeah, but I don't remember what she did for us exactly. Maybe she just dumped us here so we wouldn't drive drunk and ge- Fuck! Your car!"

He wiped his face and sighed, "We'll find it later, but right now I'm going to see if we left anything around here so we can go talk to the owner or whoever is in charge here."

"Yeah, go check the bathroom, I'll look around here."

We both split up and looked around for anything that would belong to us. I looked at the drawers first and saw a paper on it. I picked it up to see a nice written note.

Dear Frank,

You got completely wasted last night with your boyfriend and I took you here to keep you safe. If you drove a car to the club I made sure that it wouldn't be towed or anything. I paid the guy for your room and stuff, but you fucking owe me back. My #'s on the bottom of this note for you :P Have a nice hangover!

Lindsey Ballato

There was a number on the bottom of the paper just like 'Lindsey' promised and I called Gerard over to see the note. He scanned it over and laughed. He passed the paper back and looked at me with soft eyes.

"So... I guess we should go get my car." He shrugged and started walking toward the door.

I hesitated a bit because one question was mocking me, were we dating? I looked at the note and shuffled my feet nervously. Should I ask him? Would he want to date me after what happened last night? Probably not. I heard the amount of guilt he is putting on himself, and it all because of me. It looked like he forgave me but would he forgive himself? I always fuck stuff up.

"Frank, are you okay?"

During my mental scowling Gerard had turned around and have me a questioning look. I panicked and kept opening and closing my mouth, but nothing came out. I started moving my hands awkwardly and bit my lip. He tilted his head to the side and squinted his eyes slightly, his lips parted a little.

"Frank, why are y-"

"Car," I finally said.

I paced past him, blushing harder than the night before, and out of the motel room. I was so stupid! Why couldn't I just stay calm when- I just can't deal with this. I can't be in a relationship right now, it's too hard to deal with the shop, and the bills, and Katy, and- I haven't even called to ask about Katy! She's going to think I left her too! I'm an awful father, an awful, awful father.

I was practically running out of the parking lot when someone grabbed my wrist. I turned around to see Gerard staring at me, his eyes soft.

"What's wrong?" He loosened his grip on my wrist but didn't let go of it completely.

"It's just- All this is my fault. I never meant to pressure you into drinking and because of that your car is god knows where..." I looked around at the unfamiliar and barren parking lot. "I don't know where we are. I don't even know what we are."

He sadly looked at me and caressed my face with his free hand and I looked down at the pavement in shame. "Frank, what happened yesterday was a blur, but even if it was a blur I'm glad that I got to wake up next to you, no matter what."

The hand he was using to grab my wrist was now caressing my other cheek. He leaned in a kissed my lips softly. I didn't know what to do with my hands so I wrapped them around his waist. He moved his hands to my shoulders and kissed me more deeply. When he pulled apart I was breathless.

"We are this." Gerard said, his eyes making my heart skip a beat.

After we started walking off to go find his car, I realized something. Even though I hadn't known Gerard that long, he was different. He was special. That kiss was better than all of Brooklyn's kisses combined. I didn't even like Gerard anymore...

I loved him.

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A/N: I know this chapter is short so sorry! I've been über busy since school started so I'm going to be lackin on updates, but there is more coming up!