Firecracker

Chapter 6

I tossed and turned for most of the night, it was pretty late by the time we all went to bed and by the time I fell asleep it practically time to wake up again, in the end I just decided to stay awake until the others woke up and figured I could just try take a nap when I got home. That's another bad habit that I developed in America- the inability to sleep. Some people call it insomnia but I like to refer to it as a case of I've got too much on my mind how the hell am I supposed to sleep syndrome. I sat up in the bunk and looked around the room. Just yesterday I was crying over Rye and here I am, not even 24hours later sleeping in his bunk. Did I forgive him too quickly? Are things moving too fast? it was thoughts like these that haunted my mind all night. He could have completely changed, his life is so much different now. Am I just setting myself up to get hurt again by walking back into this relationship? He's going to go on tours and be gone for days, weeks , possibly months on end , do I really want to get close to him again? I looked down him, sleeping peacefully on the couch. His blankets were thrown on the floor and he was sleeping flat on his back, one arm was under his head and the other was lazily strung across his face. Even from where I was in the room I could see almost every detail on his face. The way his chest rose and fell every time he inhaled and exhaled. The way his nostrils flared as he lightly snored. The way his soft pink lips parted every few seconds to leave air out of his mouth. His lips held one of my biggest secrets, a secret that Rye himself didn't even know..
It was 2 years ago and we were at one of the biggest school parties of the year, im not going to lie and say that we both weren't a tad tipsy, because we were. The loud music pumped through the house and all around us people were stumbling around and dancing to the music. I came to the party with one of my friends but the minute we came in the door she disappeared and left me on my own. But me being me I didn't let that stop me from having a good time. A few hours into the party I felt myself getting hot and stuffy, I made my way outside and wandered through the garden of the house. It was dark outside and the patio was strung with fairy lights. I saw a figure sat down on the deck, a bottle of some kind of alcohol took up the space next to him. As I got closer I saw that it was Rye. I sat myself down next to him and we took turns taking swigs from the bottle. It was strange to see Rye drinking, it was even strange to see him at this kind of party, usually he only ever went to parties to keep me out of trouble and 'keep me safe' as he would say. We talked a lot that night, until we both went to take a drink at the same time and our hands brushed off eachother, he looked up at me, straight into my eyes. I felt the space between us getting smaller and smaller and before I knew it his lips were on mine. He kissed me so gently but so passionately at the same time. Eventually we broke apart, both in desperate need of air. Then my friend decided to re appear and drag me away from him, demanding that I help her find her boyfriend in the see of teenagers. He never spoke of the kiss again, and niether did I. I assumed that he was too drunk to remember and I didn't want to make a fool of myself by bringing it up the next day so I left it. Little did he know that was my first kiss, and little did he know that night was the first night I really felt something for my best friend.

After spending the bones of an hour just sitting in bed thinking, I decided it would be best for me to head home. None of the boys were awake yet and I didn't want to wake them so I wrote a note.

Thanks for letting me stay here last night , my dad wanted me home early so I decided to just go ahead and let myself out. Here's my number 1234567892 xx text me later ?:) p.s. Rye, I borrowed your hoodie because my clothes were still wet, I'll drop it back soon ~ sky xxx.

I quietly climbed down from Ryes bunk and slipped back on my jeans, I left on the hoodie and gathered up my wet clothes from last night. I left the note on the coffee table. As I was walking out I picked up Ryes fallen blankets and threw them over him, he cuddled into them and my heart melted at his cuteness. I bent down a softly placed a kiss on his cheek 'bye babe' I whispered. He gently stirred before turning over and returning back to his sleeping state. I left the flat feeling refreshed, happy and complete knowing that I got the answers that I wanted, I knew that my happiness wouldn't last for long - it never does but in this moment in time I didn't care, I was happy now and that's all that mattered.