Love is Creativity (Harry Styles & Selena Gomez)

Chapter 22

* ONE WEEK LATER *

Selena POV

"And Danielle was chosen to be a dancer for LMFAO, isn't that great?!"
"Y-Yeah, it's great" I nodded, as Liam kept talking and I kept looking outside the window of his car.
He kept his eyes on the road and at me at the same time,
his hands on the steering wheel as he makes a right turn,
stopping at a red light as he looks at me and nudges my shoulder playfully with his elbow,
"Hey, hey you there" he kept nudging me as I let a small chuckle and a small smile,
"Ah, there's that smile" he cooed as he chuckles a bit,
he sighs as he looks at me and I look at him,
having eye contact with each other.
"You know Sel, haven't seen you smile in a while.
Actually, a very long time"
I looked at him as I sighed and looked down at my hands,
twirling my fingers together as I nodded slowly in agreement.
I haven't told him about my pregnancy,
I just know he's going to kick me out of his home.
Liam doesn't play games,
it's like he was born to be fatherly-like and who thought him to be more like that was our mother.
Liam does get his confidence from her,
he isn't afraid of many things like I am,
which I don't know why.
I sometimes think I get it from my dad,
but how the hell should I know?
I don't even know him,
I never met him before in my life.
Basically,
let's just say Liam had more than I ever had but he suffered because he had to live through it with me and our mother.
Sometimes, I feel like I'm the blame for everything.
I was the blame for stopping her from going to college,
I was the blame my father didn't want me and left,
I was the blame we barely got by the past years.
Even when my mom had Liam,
she graduated high school,
she had help from his father, her part time job made enough to get her and Liam get by.
She had Liam at 16, she was successful, even during her divorce.
That was until she had me at 18, and everything went crashing down for us.
Basically, I was the blame for our lives
And I can't help but feel guilty.
"Selena, I know I can be hard on you most of the time,
but I am because I don't want you to go through anything like mom went through just to get us by.
It was hard for her,
thank god we did make it through those times because it was difficult" he starts to explain,
the light finally turns green as Liam starts to drive off again and continues his discussion,
"What I'm trying to say is,
I don't want you to get hurt like mom did when she had to bust herself to keep food on the table"
"I know, she didn't deserve that.
She was young.
Younger when she had you"
"Young, she was" he said,
"But Selena, I just don't want to see you make mistakes like she did, okay?
I want you to have a bright future,
be somebody, you know?
Be whatever you want, do whatever you want,
I'm here to support you"
Mistakes like mom,
it's kind of too late for that since I'm pregnant with Louis's baby.
"Exactly, what kind of mistakes are you talking about?" I asked him,
biting my bottom lip nervously as I kept twirling my fingers together.
He kept his eyes on the road as he just has one hand on the steering wheel while he uses his other hand and
runs his fingers through his brown hair,
"Like getting pregnant"
I swore I just felt like my breathing just stopped from there,
my heart was beating so fast and my stomach felt like I was going to be sick.
"If you get pregnant Sel,
I don't know what I would do with you to be honest,
I would be very disappointed" he sighs, being completely honest with me,
"But I know you wouldn't, I know you wouldn't betray me like that.
You never had before"
Now there I just felt like crying,
I felt like I was the worst sister in the whole world.
Liam is so good to me,
and this is what do to repay him back.
"L-Liam"
"Hmm?" He responds as he gives me a quick look before turning back to the road.
Tell him.
Tell him Selena, tell him!
"Nothing" I mumbled as he shrugged and keeps on driving,
I lay back more into my seat,
closing my eyes,
hating myself in every single way.
Why is my life so difficult?
I wish it was easy.

===========================

I was standing in front of my mirror,
looking at my reflection.
My eyes roam down to my stomach as I swallow heavily and let out a shaky breath.
I hesitantly move my hands over to my stomach as I rub it slowly and look at my reflection while doing it.
I let out a small smile as I look down at my stomach,
in just a few months,
I won't be able to hide it any longer.
And now, I'm sure I wouldn't have the guts to hide it throughout my whole pregnancy.
Very soon, I'm going to get big.
I look at the door and bit my bottom lip.
I'm going to do it.