Read My Lips: Restricted Version

RML: Chapter 18 (R)

Chapter 18

Linc’s fingers curled dangerously over the steering wheel.  “Caleb” was the policeman from the other night.  The man worked fast, Linc had to give him that.  And Linc wasn’t even sure why he was sitting in his truck a block away from Amber’s apartment.  Spying on her seemed so callous...something a jealous ex-boyfriend would do, and he wasn’t that, at all.  His only thought was to make sure nothing happened to Amber.  She was so sweet and innocent, and she probably didn’t have a clue what went on inside a man’s brain every other second.

The same thoughts he was experiencing, seeing her come out of her building in that pink sweater and those faded jeans.  The sweater molded across her breasts in just the right way to enhance her shape without being grossly obvious.  And the denim along her hips molded to every curve of that sweet bottom of hers, and he knew just how adorable those cheeks were when clad only in a scrap of blue silk.  That familiar leather hip bag slanted around her middle only accentuated her slender waist.

The wheel creaked under his hands, and he realized he was on the brink of breaking it off the steering column.  One finger at a time, he released his grip.  The Jeep pulled away from the curb and Linc started up his own truck.  He’d just see where they were going, make sure the guy didn’t have any corrupt motives and leave them alone.  Amber could take care of herself.  She’d proven that to Linc many times.

A few miles down the road, the Jeep turned into the back lot of St. Paul’s Presbyterian Church, and Linc had to give the guy props.  For a first date, he chose well.  A church function...how conservative.  It didn’t escape Linc that his first “date” with Amber had been at a honky-tonk where she drank herself silly, and he cringed.  The comparison was glaringly unpleasant.

Sighing with disgust at himself, he drove on, passing the church...only to make a u-turn and go back.  If he kept to the outskirts, she’d never see him.  Besides, he knew Reverend Dean from the church.  Linc sold him a broodmare a few years back.  He could locate the reverend and chat with him, and if Amber happened to see him, it would only a “coincidence.”  She seemed to place a lot of value in those.

God, she's beautiful, he thought half an hour later after getting duped into helping Mrs. Dean at petting zoo.  Amber stood a few yards away at a game booth, and she hadn’t seen him, but her smile was radiant as she threw a dart at a balloon and laughed when she missed.  He noticed the lack of children running around the carnival, and Mrs. Dean told him that tonight was their “Date Night” for church members.  “Family Night” had been the night before, and then the carnival opened up to the public for Thursday and Friday nights.  

Amber’s date laughed with her, and Linc watched as he hugged her when she won a tiny stuffed monkey.  He had to look away for fear of rushing over there to separate them, and Mrs. Dean touched his arm.  “Lincoln, I think the bowl has enough water,” she said with a knowing smile.  He blinked at the water hose in his hand and the animals’ bowl, which was overflowing onto his boots.

Quickly, he crimped the hose to stop the flow.  “Sorry,”  he said.

“That’s okay,” she said.  “Do you know the woman with Caleb Manor?”

He glanced back at Amber.  She was pointing at a cotton candy vendor and pulling Caleb in that direction.  “We’re friends,” he said simply as he walked out of the pen to turn off the faucet behind the church.  

“She seems like a sweetheart,” Mrs. Dean said, following him.

“She is,” he said.  “Too sweet sometimes.”

Mrs. Dean touched his arm again as though she understood his concerns.  “Don’t worry about Caleb.  He’s a good man.  He’ll treat her well.”

“I hope so.  Amber doesn’t have a lot of experience with men, but I’m pretty sure she can handle Caleb Manor if he tries anything funny.”

Mrs. Dean smiled and went back to the pen to collect tickets from the patrons.  Linc leaned back against the brick wall of the church, in the shadows, where he had a clear view of the whole carnival.  Caleb bought Amber a stick of pink cotton candy, the same shade of pink as her sweater and her lips, and Linc growled, because he knew that the guy saw the resemblance, too.  Who didn’t?  Hell some of the teenage boys passing by her with their girlfriends glanced back at her for a second -- sometimes third -- look of appreciation.  Linc even witnessed a grizzly old man with his wife peer zealously at Amber.  She was gaining too much lustful attention, and Linc was coming apart at the seams from watching it as a spectator.

And Caleb didn’t seem to notice that fact at all.  If that were Linc, he’d be scowling at every male in the church yard.  He was doing that anyway.  After about ten minutes, he just couldn’t watch any more.  He begged off the rest of the night with Mrs. Dean and hightailed it to his truck.  What harm could come to Amber at a church event?  Her only misfortune would come from him if he stuck around much longer.  It wasn’t jealousy, he told himself.  He was just concerned about her...as a friend should be. He’d have to call her tomorrow and ask how things went on her date.  Pretend that he didn’t know where she went and what she did.  Then he’d ask her for another sign language lesson, using an item on her list as trade.  Maybe the one about going to a baseball game.  That one had surprised him.  Who hadn’t ever been to a ball game?  His family had box seats at Kauffman Stadium for the Royals, thanks to his cousin Jason, the starting pitcher.  There was a game Friday night, a double-header, twice the fun.  If anything, he’d invite her date to come with them.  He could get to know the guy.  See if his intentions really are honorable.  And she could bring Lucy, if she wanted.  Just a bunch of friends hanging out at a game for a few hours.

Nothing abnormal about that.

*****

Amber saw Linc leaving, sticking to the shadows, and she felt offended.  What was he doing here?  Spying on her?  The nerve of that man!  However, she didn’t let herself reflect too much for fear that her temper would ruin her night with Caleb.  He really was a nice man, but she didn’t feel anything more than friendship with him.  Such a shame.  She kind of hoped her first date in a long time would end with the same kind of passion she felt with Linc when he took her dancing the other night.  But it just wasn’t there.

She sighed and bit off some cotton candy, letting the sugary fluff melt against her tongue.  If Caleb asked her on a second date, she might consider doing so, but she knew there wouldn’t be a second date.  She could hardly fail to notice the way he kept glancing at the rock climbing wall on the far side of the aisle of game booths.  At first, she thought that he might want to give it a try, but then she realized that it wasn’t the wall or the people climbing it Caleb was entranced with.  A pretty woman sat on a stool, collecting the tickets while two little children with the same reddish-blond hair played behind her.  The girl had to be about six, brushing out a Barbie doll’s hair, and the little boy, who was trying to put together a board puzzle, must have been only four at the most.  But they played happily, only occasionally looking toward the lit-up carousel with longing.

When the woman saw Caleb, she waved at them, and he stiffened.  Amber thought that maybe he wasn’t happy to see her, but as she studied him closer, she realized that small hint of yearning in his eyes.  Amber smiled to herself.  So...he had a secret crush.  Too bad the woman seemed unavailable.  The children were a dead give-away.  But then again, she might be divorced.

“Friend of yours?” she asked, prompting him to give her another clue into the situation.

“What?” he jerked, turning back to Amber.  “Oh, Annie?  Yeah, we’ve known each other for a long time.”

“Cute kids,” she said, watching him closely.  His eyes drifted back to the little ones.  That yearning returned.  Were those his children?

“Olive and Cooper,” he supplied.  “They’re wonderful kids.  She probably couldn’t get a babysitter tonight.”

Amber pursed her lips.  She was going to have to get obvious to get any information out of him.  “Their daddy here, too?”

Caleb’s eyes came back to her and they were full of sadness.  “No...Zack, he’s...he died last year.  We were rookies together, right out of the academy.  But he was deployed overseas...roadside bomb killed him two weeks into his tour.”

Amber gasped.  “Oh, no.”  She looked at Annie and the kids.  “Poor things.”

“They’re doing okay,” he said.  “Cooper barely remembers his father, but Olive had a hard time accepting that he wasn’t coming back.”  He started walking away, but Amber held onto his elbow.

“I want to meet her,” she said.  Indignation sparked in his eyes and Amber let go of his arm, startled by his reaction.

“Why?”

She decided to be blatant with him.  “Because you in love with her.”

His face shut down.  “And I suppose you want to rub that in her face.  That I’m here with you?”

Amber stuck her hands on her hips, not caring that she was getting cotton candy all over her clothes.  “No,” she said, getting angry right back at him.  “You in love with her.  She must be wonderful person.  That why.”

Staring at her like he couldn’t believe the words coming out of her mouth and wondering if she truly meant it, he asked, “Really?”

Amber huffed and rolled her eyes.  “Yes, really.  You nice man, but we only friends.  You know that.  I know that.”

Visibly, he puffed out a breath of relief.  “You’re not upset over that?  I like you, Amber, but...”  He looked over at Annie again.  “I can’t give you my heart,” he finished slowly.

Where have I heard that before? she mused wryly as she smiled at him.  But she didn’t feel slighted by him.  She couldn’t.  Which was a complete turn-around for her from a few weeks ago.  Back then, she would have been angry at Caleb, angry at every man around, for making her feel like less than other women.  But she seemed to learned something about a man’s heart in that time.  They didn’t love less than a woman, or more superficially.  In fact, a good man gave his love to one woman and didn’t give up on that, just because he lost that love.

Linc taught her how powerful a man could love.  Even from the topside of a grave.  Too bad, I’m half in love with him, she confessed to herself.  There would be pain from it, a heart break, but what could she do about it?  He always seemed to be there, coming to see her, making her smile and laugh, and then walking away.

When she brought her mind back to the present, Caleb was watching her curiously.  “I know that look,” he said with a smile.  “It’s that guy...the one who picked you up the other night.  The one with the scowl.  You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”

Amber laughed off his insinuation.  “Who, Linc?  He, another man with no heart to share.  Why?  You jealous?”

He grinned.  “If I was a lesser man, then yes, I would be jealous, but you deserve happiness, Amber.  You’re too beautiful and sweet for anything else.”

Amber linked her arm through his, feeling a kinship with him for the first time.  “Linc make me mad more than happy.  He not good for me.”

Caleb tilted his head down to her.  “Then stay away from him.”

I wish I could...

She just smiled and prodded him toward Annie’s tent.  “I pay for you climb.”  She winked at him.  “Ask Annie to help you with harness.”

He laughed, but he went along with her plan.  Caleb introduced her to Annie, and Amber offered to take the children on the carousel while he tempted fate at thirty feet in the air.  Annie was hesitant at first, but Amber reassured her that she would watch them at all times.  As the bobbing horses circled around and around and the two darlings laughed with glee, she peered once over to the climbing wall.  Caleb and Annie were engrossed with each other, their hands touching as they both tried to fit the harness around his body.  Amber felt happy for them.  She hoped that Annie knew she could find comfort in Caleb’s arms if she only dared.

All too soon, the night was over.  She danced with Caleb only once before delicately begging off any more embarrassment.  It just wasn’t the same.  While dancing with Linc, she could almost hear the music, feel its beat coursing through his body as he held her, but with Caleb...she had two left feet and him holding her felt awkward.  He didn’t mind, though.  She could see that written all over his face.  He’d been gracious and teasing about their dancing, but his heart hadn’t been in it.  And Amber wasn’t the least bit annoyed by that.  She even convinced Annie to dance with him because Amber said, “I horrible dancer.  And Caleb want to dance...please?”

Seeing the two of them on that dance floor in the middle of the parking lot, Amber knew she’d done the right thing.  They were perfect together, moving in sync and practically floating over the ground.  So, when he drove Amber home, a tiny, pleased smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.  “Thank you,” he said when they stood outside of her building.  “You are a wonderful woman.  I only wish things were different.”

Amber pressed a finger over his lips and hushed him.  “It okay.  You find happiness.”

He pulled her into a warm hug and kissed her forehead.  She watched him leave, feeling no regret for her decisions tonight.  Waving at him as he pulled away from the curb, she smiled...right up until he disappeared around a corner, and then she stomped over to the alley next to her apartment and confronted Linc standing there in the shadows.

She didn’t know when she first sensed his presence, but she knew he was there from the blast of anger hitting her back when Caleb embraced her.  Hands on hips and a scowl on her face, she glared up at him.  “What you doing?”

He grinned at her.  “Just making sure you got home okay.  How was your date?”

Amber threw up her hands in disgust and walked away from him.  “Go home, Linc,” she shouted over her shoulder, not bothering to turn around to see if he obeyed.  He followed her to the door, and she sighed.  It was too much to hope he would just go away.  She already told one man to follow his heart.  She didn’t need to be reminded that this one couldn’t give her his.

“What you want, Linc?” she asked, punching in her door code.

“Just curious...what do you see in that guy?”

She shot him a heated glare.  “Caleb nice man.  He not spy on me all night.”

“I wasn’t spying on you all night,” he replied, putting his foot in the door when she tried to close on his face.  “I know your code,” he warned with a glimmer of mischief.  But she wasn’t about to ask him up to her apartment, so she stepped back out onto the sidewalk to convince him to leave.

“So...no good-night kiss from your date?  That must have been disappointing.”

On the contrary, if Caleb had tried to kiss her, she would have smacked him.  Especially after what she learned about him that night.  But she didn’t tell Linc that.  She just stared at him, keeping her mouth shut and hoping he would get the hint.

No such luck.  “Come on, Amber.  We’re friends.  Friends talk about this kinds of stuff.”

“Girlfriends talk about dates,” she said hotly.  “You not girl, and you fast losing friendship.”

He chuckled.  “Okay, how about this?  Come with me to a ball game this Friday.  It’s on your list of things to experience, and you can invite your boyfriend and anybody else you wish.”

“He not my boyfriend.”

“Then your guy-friend, or whatever you want to call him.  I don’t care.  I’m just offering to take you to a game.”

How was it that one man could be so freaking irritating and so damn charming at the same bleeping time?  Can she tear his hair out while kissing him senseless?  Would that give him mixed signals?  Or should she just give up trying to wrestle with her feelings for him?  Sometimes, she felt like she was hanging onto a bucking bull, not sure whether to jump off or hang on for the ride and the prize at the end.  

“Okay!” she screeched, which only drew out another grin from him.  “I talk to Lucy.  She might come.”

“Not your boyfriend?”

“Good night, Linc,” she said and disappeared inside.  But when she asked Lucy the next morning at work about Friday night, Lucy said, “Sorry, Amber.  I have a date with Brian that night, remember?”

She almost begged Lucy to bring Brian with her...but she couldn’t do that to her friend.  Despite  Lucy’s fears on dating, Amber knew she wanted to be alone with him to determine for herself whether this was something worth pursuing.  Thankfully, Linc left her alone for the next few days.  Amber was able to get a lot of work done, and she even went by the DMV and could now legally drive in the state of Missouri.  Now all she needed was to actually buy a car.  She planned to do that last weekend, but things happened.  Yet it was exciting just thinking about the freedom of owning her own mode of transportation.  She really wanted a car.  It was the epitome of independence.  She’d been robbed of that experience as a teenager, so now she wanted to cross it off her list.  She’d have the important parts of the teenage years behind her -- the dating and the car.  She even had the car picked out...one of those adorable micro-cars, the tiny two-seater eco-friendly one, in lime green.  A picture of it was pinned to her cork board right next to her To-Do list.  And it made her smile with expectation every time she looked at it.

But for now, that item on her list had to wait.  She had the money saved up for a down-payment, and if she budgeted well, she could swing the payments easily.  In the meantime, there were other things she could be scratching off her list.  Like that baseball game Linc offered.  She wondered how much of her list he remembered...or did he make a copy?  That question irritated her.  If he did copy her list, Amber felt he had no right to do so.  It was her list.  She wanted to make all those things happen.  She didn’t mind a little help here and there, but if Linc thought he was going to start fulfilling everything on there -- out of some sense of payment for teaching him sign language -- then he could just stuff it!  Right were the sun doesn’t shine!

There was one thing on her list, written hastily on the back in case anyone saw it, that she was determined to work on.  Her speaking.  She started taking things slow and picturing her words in her mind before talking, like seeing them in print...the words spelled out into a grammatically correct sentence.  Lucy applauded her efforts, and as the next few days passed, she spoke more and more confidently.

On Friday after work while waiting for Linc to pick her up, she thought about how he seemed determined to chaperon her with her quests and she almost ripped the list into pieces to rewrite it.  But that would be retrogressive and moronic and childish.  She’d just have to tell him to back off if he decided to implement more activities.

However, his impertinence was getting old...real quick.  He didn’t text her to let her know when he arrived at her building; he punched in her entry code and came right up to her apartment, like he owned the damn place...or lived there.

Jerking her door open, she glared at him.  “I live here for two reasons,” she spit at him before he could get out a hello.  “It is close to work, and not just anyone can come to my door.”  He just grinned lazily at her.  “You can wait downstairs and text me before you come up,” she told him angrily.

“Sure thing, Amber,” he said, still grinning, and she wanted to punch him.  Damn man.  She should have arranged to meet him there.  Peeking over her shoulder, he arched an eyebrow.  “So, just you and me tonight?  No boyfriend?”

Amber slammed the door in his face.

A few minutes passed, and she thought he left.  She even cracked open her door and peered into the hallway.  It was empty.  Ugh!  Fine!  He apparently didn’t like her rules, so he was gone.  Dang it!  And she so looked forward to going to that game.  

Her cell phone vibrated from her back pocket.  She opened up her messaging screen and read the words,  “Let’s start again.  Hey, Amber, it’s Linc.  You ready to go?  I’m downstairs.”

She rolled her eyes, sent him one reply, a favorite of hers and one he should recognize from the night she showed it in person to Joanie and Buck, “_l_,” and then went down to meet him.  He was laughing when she saw him.

“Bad day?” he asked, tucking his phone into his own back pocket.

“Not really,” she said offhandedly.  “But the day is not over.”

He just smirked and escorted her into his truck.  She sighed.  Soon, she would have her own vehicle.  Then maybe he would ride with her.

What am I thinking? she chided herself.  Tall, long-legged Linc in a mini-car?  Oh, heavens!  Just the picture in her mind gave her a fit of giggles.  He raised his eyebrows at her in question when he slid in under the steering wheel.  She watched how his legs stretched out as he pressed on the clutch to start the engine, and she started giggling again.  Oh, my word!  He’d fold up like a lawn chair in a car the size she wanted, his knees bumping against his chin, and those long arms and broad shoulders bumping against the window and door...

Amber giggled to herself all the way to the stadium.  Linc said nothing.  He seemed happy to just let her smile and laugh without asking why.  She liked this side of him, the non-nosy, non-spying side.  She felt like she could be herself, not get angry or irritated because he assumed he could just interfere with her private thoughts.  She never asked about his life with Macie or his life since then, and she expected the same treatment.  

As he parked in the massive lot near a gate, she realized that he hadn’t asked about her date at all this evening.  If he had, she would have told him to butt out, but he hadn’t, so she was glad.  She really didn’t want to get angry with him tonight.  She just wanted to have some fun...the kind of fun she had with him the night he took her dancing.  He’d been in a good mood most of that night, and it had been a balm to her soul, knowing that he enjoyed her company.  Caleb had enjoyed her company, too, but it wasn’t the same.  Caleb was like Lucy -- a friend.  Linc was something else...more than a friend, yet undefined.  And she hoped she didn’t have to give him a title in the near future.  She liked things just the way they were...most of the time.

In a gentlemanly gesture, Linc helped her out of his truck and looked her up and down.  “Our box seats are out in the open, not one of those fancy air-conditioned suites.  That pretty skin of yours is going to fry today,” he said, taking in her sleeveless tunic and short leggings.  Reaching into the cab, behind the seat, he pulled out an old ball cap and fit it on her head, tucking strands of hair behind her ears.  With a grin and a tap on her nose, he said, “Cute as a bug.”

Amber rolled her eyes and adjust the cap more snugly.  “You are not wearing a hat,” she said, slowly, concentrating on her words.  Would he notice that she’d been practicing?

His grin tugged up at one corner.  “Honey...my skin isn’t as pretty as yours, but I spend a lot of time working out in the sun.  I’ve been tanned like a cowhide since I was old enough to walk.  From here on up,” he added, drawing a line across his waistband.  Amber blinked at the image of his chest and abs all golden like his arms and face...and then she lowered her gaze to the bottom half of his body.  What about the rest of him?

The question was on the tip of her tongue, and apparently all over her face because when she lifted her gaze, he winked and said, “Now that is the million-dollar question, ain’t it?”

Amber didn’t have a million dollars, but she’d pay in trade to see the answer.  

And for the first time that night, she noticed what he was wearing...casual jeans, athletic shoes that have been broken-in considerably and a Royals t-shirt.  He almost looked like a different man without the boots and belt buckle.  But his smile was the same, and his slightly bowlegged stance was the same, and that tightly-held fire in his eyes was the same, and she felt just the same warmth inside her when he looked at her that way.

She had half a mind to skip the game and drag him the bed of his truck.  Good lord, what is wrong with me?  I can’t spend two minutes with this man without wanting to hit him or kiss him.

As she stood there, trying to get her mind back to the non-titled friendship she was supposed to be sharing with him, he checked his watch and said, “The game is about to start.  So, unless you plan to hang out here all night, let’s get on inside, shall we?”

The game...right.  That’s why she was here.  To watch a baseball game...a real one.  Not one of those kid games from high school, when she didn’t have a friend with her to help explain what was going on.  She knew the basics of baseball, but that was it.  Football and basketball, she could follow, since her dad was a huge fan of those sports, but for some reason, he never liked baseball, and she’d been curious to know why a bunch of grown men felt the desire to hit a tiny, flying ball with a stick of wood.  And watching on television just wasn’t the same.

“Okay,” she said, falling into step beside him.  The closer they got to the gate, the more people crowded around them.  Amber had to edge her way through them to keep up with Linc’s fast pace, but she paused for a moment to let a family pass by her.  She smiled at the adorable little girl in her daddy’s arms, and she lost sight of Linc.

Instinctively, she stopped moving.  Years of survival kicked in.  As a child, she’d been taught to stay put if she ever got lost.  “If you ever get lost, you stay right where you are, okay?  And if someone tries to grab you, you scream your head off.  We will come find you, but you stay in one spot.”  Her parents had been strict about that kind of thing.  At twenty-eight, that one lesson still held true.  But she wasn’t about to start screaming.  She’d look like a fool.  With a deep breath, she scanned the crowd, looking for a tall man with a Royals t-shirt.

Big problem.  There were hundreds of tall men with Royals t-shirts.  All moving away from her so she couldn’t see their faces.  She turned in a circle, sticking to her spot and looked around.  She dared not go back to the truck, because she knew for sure she’d become lost in the maze of vehicles, and she couldn’t go inside because Linc had the tickets and she didn’t know which section they were sitting in anyway.  All she could do was stand there and wait...and pray she didn’t start panicking or crying.

Where is he?

Five minutes passed.  Then ten.  Amber starting considering her options again.  The crowd was dying down a bit, but she still didn’t see Linc.  She could walk over to the nearest security guard and ask someone to page Linc...or she could--

What am I doing?! she thought, pulling her cell phone out of her bag.  Just standing here!  I should have texted him ages ago.  She started tapping out a message when a rough hand grabbed her arm and spun her around.  

“Jesus Christ, Amber!  I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” Linc shouted, his face twisted in anger and worry.  “What the hell are you doing, just standing here?”

Her own anger tried to surface, but she was just so glad to see him that her eyes began welling up.  “I...I...”

“Dammit, Amber,” he growled and crushed her to his chest, hugging her tightly.  He pressed his cheek against her temple and held her, shaking violently.  After a long moment, he pulled back and said, “I thought something happened to you. I got to the gate and turned around and you weren’t there, and...”  He crushed her again.  Amber could only close her eyes and breathe him in.  She hadn’t panicked.  She’d done exactly what she was supposed to do, and yet...she’d never felt safer than right then in his arms.

“I am sorry,” she whispered into his shoulder.  “I looked up and you were gone and...”

“I thought someone snatched you,” he said when he looked at her again, cupping his palms around her cheeks and wiping the drops of tears off her eyelashes.  “You scared me out of ten years growth.”

He was still shaking.  His pupils were dilated nearly to the rims, and she’d never seen anyone so terrified and furious and relieved.  “Why didn’t you come to the gate?”

“I did not know which gate.  You have the tickets,” she explained, backing away from his touch before she crawled into his arms again.  He closed his eyes and inhaled a shaky breath, his body slowly releasing its tension.  

“Okay,” he said.  “I’m sorry I yelled at you.  Just stay with me, alright?”  He grabbed her hand without asking for the right and pulled her along with him, and he didn’t let go until they reached their seats in the stands behind the home plate.  Amber sat down obediently in one of the chairs in the private area and stared straight ahead while Linc paced the length of the box behind her.  She could see his lips moving from the corners of her eyes and knew he was mumbling to himself and walking off his emotions.  Her father used to do the exact same thing.

Shame and embarrassment crowded up inside her chest.  She’d felt like a helpless child out there when she lost him.  She hated the fact that she had to have someone look after her when she went somewhere new.  And she hated herself for not being more retroactive or independent in her actions.  She wanted Linc to comfort her and tell her she was safe.  She wanted him to hold her and guide her, and she hated wanting all that.  She should be able to go anywhere she pleased without a chaperon, and dammit, she would!

Standing up abruptly, she turned to face him.  “I am going to the bathroom,” she said calmly and slowly.  He nodded and began to lead the way.  Amber stamped her foot down on the concrete ground.  “No.  Alone.”

“Amber, it’s a big place--”

“No!  I can go alone,” she repeated.

He stared at her.  “Fine,” he requited and pulled her ticket out of his back pocket.  “Just take this in case--”

She didn’t let him finish.  She snatched it out of his hands and brushed by him.  With her back straight and her chin up, she stomped up the steps in search of the ladies’ room.  It only took her fifteen minutes and two-backtracks to find it.  But she did, and she did all on her own.