Lost for words (justin bieber fanfic)

Chapter 14 say something

Emma's prov

I stayed in Justin's arms I was not scared of him anymore I was just unsure what I wanted, what I know and what my heart was telling me. my heart says stay and give him a chance but my head say run while you can. When he calmed down he lifted his head up and said "baby give me till tomorrow to make it up to you, I know you don't remember the good times we had and that you may be scared of me right now but, but please baby just give me till tomorrow to show you that you can trust me and that you should not be afraid" I looked up in to his hopeful eyes as he still had tears in them breaking my heart. "ok" I said nodding he gave me a weak smile not showing him perfect teeth because he was to venerable right now to. I slowly let Justin go and headed off to bed. I'm guessing he wanted to plan what ever he was doing because he did not came to bed at all last night which made me sad to know he is still broken. I fell as if I'm stuck in four walls and everyone is looking in just waiting for me to crack watching me slowly brake down till I lost it. the longer I'm in here the walls begin to become smaller, I may be learning thing I did not know before but it is just killing me in side.

I got up the next morning and still Justin was not in the room. I got up and looked around the house but I could not find him anywhere at all. I needed to talk to him, I need to let him now what I am feeling, with out yelling and screaming, with out hurting each other, I need to talk to him so he would under stand and I could get things off my chest but he did not seem to be anywhere. I began to get worried about where he could be. I decided to let it go and get ready for the day. I had a shower then put on a long white dress with red and pink flowers on it. I went down stairs and began to cry as if my heart has been broken but I don't know why I just could not stop. I did not want to eat the voice in my head just keep telling me what was the point?!. I sat here for hours with the same questions coming up in my head like they always do but new ones began to came up the more I thought. why could he have not just killed me right then and there and get the pain over with?! this hurts way more then it would of getting killed. why am I even still here on this earth ?! why can't I just be like the other? why is my life so messed up? I just want to get out of here and ran away, so far that my legs can't carry me anymore, but at the end I want Justin there to pick me up off of the floor and tell me every thing was going to be ok when we both already know it would not. I just want to be someone else and live life differently. I feel as if I have nothing to life for. the more I though the more depressed I got and I would get more confused on what I really wanted in life or if I really wanted to be here to have a life at all. the only time when I don't think like this, feel like this or keep giving my self these impossible question I could never answer was when I was around Justin. he made me feel different. he made me forget about it all. even though I try so hard to push him away he never gives up because he knows deep down the real me is still here and it's like he won't stop till he gets her back. but I'm starting to think she is not coming back. I can try so hard to be her, to be happy, to be someone I'm not but here I am with these questions that just will not go away no matter how happy I try to pretend I am. the only think I'm good at Is pushing away the ones I need. I looked around to see it was already dark out side. I have been sitting around all day bringing my self down and where was Justin when I needed him the most. I was not scared of him and I don't know why?. he has yelled in my face so may time and made me have all these questions about my existence. he has pushed me to far. he broke me and then is not around to fix me. I guess it all was just a lie he does not love me it is all just an act how could he just leave me like this after last night. after I let him in and he just yells cried on my shoulder then left not even thinking that I need someone's there for me to cry on there shoulder.

About another lonely hour later there was a knock at the door. I stumbled over to the door felling nothing but down. I opened the door to see Justin standing there in a suit with flowers in his hand making me smile a little knowing he did not leave me, until I looked up at his face to see it all red and his eye where all puffy like he had not stopped crying from last night. I pulled him in to a hug with out saying a word. "where do you go?" I asked " I hand to make my plan up for you" he explained I just nodded my head and looked at him for a while. we just stared in to each others eyes getting lost. "come on" he said grabbing my hand and leading my though the house. we come to the back door and he opened it. my mouth dropped to the floor it was amazing. there was fairy lights everywhere in all different colours. and a swing chair in the corner with candles all around it. Justin still had hold of my hand and he lead me to the big clear space in the middle. he grabbed both of my hands and made me look at him. "this is amazing!" said looking deep in to his eye. he smiled at what I said, but not the one he has been doing for the last few day, a real smile full of hope and happiness.

Justin's prov
I held on to both of her hand as the music began to play. it was say something by a great big world and Cristina Aguilar. it explained exactly how I have been feeling lately. ( listen to the song why you are reading this chapter it guess really well together) I put her hands around my neck then I rested mine on her waist. we began to slow dance.

Say something I'm giving up on you
Ill be the one if you want me to

Anywhere I would have followed you
Say something I'm giving up one you

And I am feeling so small
It was over my head
I know nothing at all

And I will stumble and fall
I'm still learning to love
Just starting to crawl.

We where feather away then I wanted us to be. I pulled her closer to me till all of my body was touching her and trust me I loved the feeling. she rested her head on my shoulder and I did the same to her.

Say something I'm giving up on you
I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you

Anywhere I would of followed you
Say something I'm giving up on you

And I will swallowed my pride
Your the one that I love
And I'm saying good bye

Say something I'm giving up on you
And I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you

And any where I would have followed you

Say something I'm giving up on you
Say something I'm giving up on you
Say something

We stayed so close together for the hole song as I gently rocked her side to side. As the song began to end I pulled away and looked at her. we both began to lean in and it felt so right. are lips brushed together just before they where pushed agents each other. are lips started to move in perfect time together. She did not pull away from me and there was no way I wanted to pull away as well. She tugged at my hair making me moan in to the kiss. My hands where cupping her face. I slowly let them ran down to her hips. we both danced as we keep kissing. the next song began to come on and it was dont you remember by adel. We where making out till about the chorus of the song until we both pulled away out of breath and keep slow dancing to the song

Don't you remember
Don't you remember the reason you loved me before
Baby please remember me once more

When was the last time you though of me
Or have you completely erased me from your memoir

I often think about where I went wrong
The more I do the less I know

There was no way I was letting her slip our of my grip again not this time. she began to get sleepy. I let her go but I was still holding one hand. I lead her over to the chair swing and sat down with her. she sat on my lap facing me. she hide her head in my neck and shut her eyes. my hands where on her waist keeping her in place. I began to swing it a little. it was not like there was not enough room for both of us I just like this position way more ! The next song that came on was one life the song I wrote for her. I smiled and began to sing along softly in to her ear. I gently kissed it and keep rocking us using my feet. I wish this night could go on forever.

Hey guys let me know what you though of this chapter I think it was cute Emma is staring to fall for him all over again with or with out her memoir. Comment what you think. I will be updating soon.