Cabin Fever

Of Course

Ryan

It felt good to be back. I never thought I'd miss any of this. The restlessness of the city, the crowds of people on the strip, the sounds of life keeping me awake. Not like that's an issue. Sleep has never been easy for me. Its crazy how being away from something from such a short time can make you homesick.
My lyric book sits in front of me, the fresh page I had turned to is still bare. The pencil being my only weapon. Thoughts are swarming through my mind but not enough for me to grasp and write down.
Ever since we got back we have made two new songs. The names are yet to be determined.
With defeat I shut the small leather book and close my eyes. Desperate to grab a hold on something I could write I almost give up.
And then it comes to me
~~~~~~~~~
Brendon

I play the same notes I was told to till my fingertips bleed.
The recording studio is no longer bare with blue sound barriers. Tapestries cover the walls now. As Jon and Spencer said, in order to make an indie album we have to feel the indie vibe. Im not complaining though. I as look across the room my eyes instinctively land on Ryan. He looks calm and content as he sits on the slumpy couch, writing in his lyric book. Lately that's what seems to make him preoccupied. I was glad because I had something I wrote that I wanted to show him as well.

"Okay that was good Brendon you can take a break now." Bob said over the speaker. Bob Mathes was our music producer. So far he has done a really good job helping us out. My knees nearly buckled as I got up from my seat. Nearly every bone in my body cracked as I arched my back. Even though I looked like an 80 year old man trying to regain good posture I wouldn't trade this for the world. I pick the spot closest to Ryan and lean my head on his bony shoulder.

"Tired?" He chuckles.

"Yeah." I answer back yawning. "How's the writing coming along?"

"Really good...Its just not ready." I look at him with sleepy eyes.

"So that means I can't read it?" He smiles and boops my nose.

"Its a surprise." Looking around to see if Scott or Bob are around he lightly pecks me on the lips. Its kind of sad that we can't come out to everyone. Then again, we wouldn't get the same reaction as Spencer or Jon.
"If you're not too tired, you want to come over tonight?"

"Okay."
~~~~~~~~
Ryan

"Stop Ryan you're gonna make me pee!" He laughs as I bury my fingers into his sides even harder. My back bumps into the kitchen counter as he fights back. I finally stop making him turn around and press his lips to mine. I gripped his waist hard, trying hard not to let him go. He pulls away breathless and presses against my forehead.

"Oh shit the sauce is boiling over!" I laugh hard as he runs to the stove and frantically tries to turn off the burner. He lets out a sigh of relief and serves us each a plate of pasta. He looks back at me. I smile and laugh at him once more.

"Oh fuck off you almost made me burn the food."
I don't have much furniture so we settle on the couch quietly eating. After we're done I turn on the t.v. and get the comforter out of room and snuggle in next to him.
Its midnight now as the t.v. glows in front of us still but we weren't paying attention to it at all. Brendons lips were on mine. It wasn't lustful. It was deeper than anything I had ever experienced before. His tongue traces the entrance of my bottom lip as let him in. I would let him go further but I know he is exhausted. He lets me pull away from him. His beautiful brown eyes bore into mine. The darkness under his eyes had become more prominent.

"When was the last time you slept?" He shrugs.

"Two days, I have been writing a song and I got a lttile took carried away I guess."

"I thought we said we'd leave the writing to me-"

"I know but I want to help."

"That's fine but next time get some rest okay?" He nods as yawns and leans his head on my shoulder again. Staring blankly at the screen. Another five minutes goes by and he breaks the silence again.

"Ryan?"

"Hm?"

"Will you be my boyfriend." He whispers into my neck. I was taken aback. My heart fluttered at his words.
"Its okay if you say no, I understand I get it, we are moving to fast I'm-"

"Of course." I whispered. I feel his smile on my lips. He pulls away. A slight blush creeps. On his face. I kiss the top of his head lightly. After a while his eyes drooped closed. Until I was pretty sure he was asleep. I get up and lightly pick him up as well. I carefully lay him on the bed. He mumbles something incoherent as I go back and fetch the comforter. He immediately rolls over closer to me. Our legs intertwined with eachothers. His breaths blowing against my neck lightly. I never thought I'd ever reach this level of contentedness until now. I peck his forehead lightly. His eyes flutter. Showing that he's clearly dreaming.

"I love you." I whisper. He holds onto me tighter as if he had heard what I just said but remains quiet. As time ticks by I find myself growing more tired as well. I close my eyes letting the waves of sleepiness take over on me. My mind drifts to Brendon. What we have. What he means to me. I love his laugh. His smile. His skin. But most important of all

Him.