echoes of silence *WWE Fanfic

iv.

As I stare at my reflection in the mirror and I feel a deep sadness. It feels like I can still hear Brie complain about the costumes or about the way I did her makeup.

But Brie is not here anymore. She left with mom and JJ. She left me and I feel so much anger inside.

I'm so selfish because I wanted Brie to stay with me. She did the right thing to quit and starting a new life away from this misery.

She was strong enough to make that decision and I wasn't. I'm weak and vulnerable. I'm scared so scared that I won't ever get out of this hell hole.

My eyes start to water and I don't want to cry because I just did my makeup. I'm glad no one is here but me.

I look at my matching red bra and panties. Looking at myself like this disgusts me in so many ways.

"You look like shit." A particular voice says. I don't even have to look to realize that it's Paige. Her thick British accent is recognizable anywhere.

"Come on. Cheer up mate. You're about to dance on a pole, half naked, in front of dirty middle aged men. Isn't that fun?" She asks sarcastically as she laughs.

Paige stands beside me and I look at her mini black dress and dark makeup. She's always wearing black. She says it matches her soul.

She's one of the youngest in here. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that a girl so young is here.

Why am I surprised? I started out young too. I'm still young. I should be dating- or even married- right now. I shouldn't be here.

"Are you sad because your sister left? Think about it this way. It's better for her to leave this business but it's also very stupid. She won't get paid like we do."

She puts on more black lipstick even though she has enough already. I simply look down because mentioning Brie makes me very sentimental.

"You really do look depressed. More than me I'd say." She says. "I am depressed." I say. "You know what makes me forget?"

I look up to her and she pulls out something from her bra. It's a folded napkin. She unfolds it carefully and I see a few colored pills.

"Want to try one of my happy pills?" She hands me a small bright green one. I shake my head no and turn to look at my reflection again.

"Are you sure? It makes me forget. It takes me to trips far away from here. It helps when I'm in this place."

I pretend to fix my hair and ignore her comment. "I'll leave this little love pill here if you decide to take it but shhh you didn't get it from me."

She walks out and I look at the tiny pill. My shaky hand grabs it and brings it closer to me.
"It takes me to trips far away from here. It helps when I'm in this place."

I slowly bring it to my mouth and swallow it. It's very small so it was easy to swallow without water.

As soon as I take it I expect to feel different but I don't. I feel normal. I feel sad. I feel empty. I feel like always.

"Nikki come on you're up next." Lana says opening the door. I jump up startled and glance at the mirror one more time.

I walk behind Lana down the dark hallway. The music is so loud it's already making my head hurt.

"Guess what?" Lana asks excitedly. "What?" I ask. "Rollins is here!" She gushes with a grin. "Oh." I simply say.

I would like to be happy and excited but if he's here he's usually here for Eva. "What do you mean oh? Aren't you excited? This is your chance to be noticed, Nikki. You could have him eating out of your hand. With your looks and those melons you can get to paradise."

That's what I use to think. I'm starting to realize that big breasts and looks isn't paradise. It's hell.

As we approach the loud music and lights I start feeling odd. The music seems louder. The colors seem brighter.

"There he is!" Lana whispers to me. My vision seems a bit blurry and I feel drowsy. Lana is pointing somewhere but I can't concentrate enough to see where.

"I'll announce you. Hold on." Lana says. I feel like I'm sweating a lot and everything seems heighten.

I'm looking everywhere and it feels like everything is going too fast. The music is so loud it's hurting my ears. The neon lights everywhere are making my eyes hurt.

What is wrong with me?

I'm staring to regret taking whatever Paige gave me because now I'm freaking out. I've never felt like this before and it scares me.

"Attention everyone!" Lana says on the microphone. I look at the stage and see Lana with her bright pink lipstick and her mini black skirt.

The men start whistling and she smiles putting a piece of her perfectly blonde hair behind her ear.

"I have a special treat for you tonight." She says slowly. She looks directly at the crowd and I'm sure she's looking at him.

"She's one of the house favorites. Her curves and beautiful glowing skin make every guy drool."

I take a deep breath and try to calm myself down. I'm trying to think of what to do but I can't even think right now.

Suddenly I start feeling relaxed. Very, very, relaxed. My body feels like it's floating and I just want to laugh and cry at the same time.

"She will make you melt at her sight. Her moves will seduce every atom of your body. You will immediately fall in love with her."

I'm hearing Lana's words and I'm trying to comprehend. Is she talking about me? Am I that good? Her words are floating in my brain and it makes me smile. Not sure why though.

"I'm pretty sure you know who she is because she's impossible to forget. Without further introduction may I present to you... Nikki Bella!"