echoes of silence *WWE Fanfic

xliii.

The warm water hitting my back is relaxing. I'm in the shower thinking about everything that happened this afternoon.

From my window I saw that Orton left a while ago. Seth hasn't came to see me or anything. I'm scared to go downstairs and talk to him.

I don't want him to be angry or upset with me for causing so much problems. I know he loves me but everything has a breaking point.

And I feel like Seth is slowly getting there with me. The thought of losing him truly terrifies me. No man has ever made me feel the way he does.

He makes me feel safe and important. The thought of not having him by my side makes my heart sink into a hole.

The water starts turning cold and I finally get out of the shower. I stand on the rug in front of the mirror while I grab a towel. When I glance at myself in the mirror I get a flashback.

"You're doing what?" Brie looks at me in complete shock. Like she never saw it coming. "You heard me." I say.

"But why?" She asks giving me this look. "Why do you mean why? Because I want to do it." I answer a bit aggravated.

"I think your breasts are just fine. You don't need to make them bigger." She says. "I don't like them. You know I never have liked them."

"What is mom and JJ going to say about it?" She sounds worried and upset. "They won't know until they see me. I'd like to remind you they're thousands of miles away. Plus, it's my body. I can do whatever I want."

"Where are you even going to get the money?" I take a sit on the chair and avoid looking at her. "Lana said she'd let me borrow it and I can pay her back."

"Lana? Of course she had to be behind all of this! You know she's a bad influence on you, Nicole. Ever since you met her you've gotten these weird ideas."

"They're not weird, Brianna. She's right. I can make a lot of money and you can too. We can do it to help mom and JJ."

Brie doesn't say anything and just keeps looking at me. "Brie, Lana is only trying to help us."

"I just hate the fact that you don't like your body the way it is." She says avoiding the other comment.

"I just want big breasts to get out of this misery."

"Nicole?" Seth's voice brings me back to reality. I quickly grab my robe and walk out of the bathroom.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know you were showering." He says clearing his throat. "It's fine." I reply. He steps back glancing at the door, "I can come back-"

"No!" I say way too quickly. "I mean you can stay. If you want." I whisper. "I just wanted to stop by to see if you were okay."

I sit on the bed and look up at him. "I'm fine. Are you okay?" He nods his head, "Yeah." I'm fidgeting with my nails nervously.

"Is he going to tell Roman?" I ask anxiously. "He said he wasn't but I don't know honestly." He replies.

"I'm sorry for causing so much trouble." Seth sits beside me on the bed and grabs my hand. "It's not your fault. You don't cause me trouble."

He kisses my hand and gives me a small smile. "Thank you." I respond. "For what?" He asks. "For being nice to me."

He chuckles, "I try to be." We look at each other smiling for a few seconds. "Your hair is dripping wet." He says grabbing my dripping hair.

"I know." I say as he caresses my cheek. "I really do love you, Nicole." He says with a sigh. "I don't doubt it."

"Your name plays on my head like a song on repeat. I wish you would know how much you mean to me."

"When you look at me like that and when you say things like that... you make me feel like your whole world."

"You're not my world, Nicole. You're my universe." He keeps caressing my cheek and it makes my whole body tingle.

I lay my face against his hand and close my eyes slowly. "That's why I have to let you go." He says.

I open my eyes abruptly and confused. "What?" It comes out as a whisper. "I have to let you go, Nicole. Or else you won't ever be safe."

"What do you mean? I'm safe when I'm with you." I say. "I can't protect you, Nicole. Not if Orton tells Reigns. I can't. He's going to haunt you down until he finds you and he's going to kill you. He's already tried it and I can't let that happen again."

"That was my fault! I promise I won't do something like that anymore. I'm sorry." The panic is running through my veins.

My chest and throat feel tight. That familiar awful feeling is slowly spreading through my body and I can't stop it.

"Nicole, you and I both know this can't work out. I can't hide you forever. Sooner or later someone is going to find out and they'll come after you. Not just Roman or Orton. I've got enemies, Nikki. If they ever want to hurt me they'll go for you. They won't have any compassion and they will hurt you. If I let that happen I would hate myself for eternity. That's why I have to stop being so selfish and get you away from me. Even if it kills me inside."

My heart starts to crumple piece by piece. My eyes fill up with tears and he leans in to kiss my lips.

His lips feel like heaven but hurt like hell. When he pulls away he looks at me with his sad sweet eyes.

He gets up from the bed and walk out of the room. My whole body feels numb and I want to scream at him but the sadness overtakes me.

So I sit on my bed cold and heartbroken.