Life Unexpected

Something Reckless

I'm a reckless person; to myself, to others. I've always been a reckless person. But the most reckless thing I have ever done is let myself fall for the one person that I can't have. I tried so hard. I told myself over and over again that I could not fall in love with her. She was the coach's daughter, I'm not that stupid.

It started when we met. There she was standing in the summer sun; her long hair waving in the slight breeze, her skin-- a golden, sun-kissed brown. She was gorgeous. Her laugh was contagious. I had to keep telling myself that she was nothing but looks, nothing but a cold girl who cared about her looks...

Then came the hallway. She seemed so nice, naive, but nice. So now I'm sitting in this hotel hallway with a girl that has a voice that would never get old. I could listen to her talk about anything. She isn't making this any easier...

Followed by team bonding. This girl ended Never Have I Ever with nine fingers (the one doesn't really count). But I couldn't stop looking at her. I ended the night with a slap in the face, literally, she slapped me in the face while she was asleep. I stayed up thinking how I was going to get this dorky girl out of my head...

Summer began and I couldn't stop thinking about her. I saw her every week for practice and almost every weekend for tournaments. I kept telling myself that I couldn't. I couldn't spend at least a whole softball season with her if I was in love. That would just be stupid and reckless...

We celebrated the 4th of July in Greenwood. She met my extended family and we had so much fun. We rode around town in a golf cart until at least 3:30 in the morning. We helped change the tire on that golf cart at 2:30 in the morning then continued to ride it. We ended the night falling asleep in the basement. I laid there in the dark thinking about how badly I was falling for this girl, and how badly it was going to hurt when she didn't catch me...

The summer was a whirlwind of emotions and events. Lines were crossed, feelings were hurt, and damage was done. I wasn't sure that anything could be fixed. I thought, no matter how many times I forgave her and myself, that it would never go away. I was hoping that maybe one day I'd see just how stupid these feelings were. But no matter how many times I got hurt, I kept coming back to her...

I constantly tried pushing Corie away. I started hooking up with people to make her feel jealous, to make her feel how I was feeling. But while I was with other people, I only thought about her. She was the one thing in my mind, her and no one else. I knew then that it wasn't worth it. I knew that this girl wouldn't ever get out of my life...

So I decided once again to push her away. Days before my Christmas party I told Corie that we'd get one more night together. Little did I know, that night would change my life...

Now I know what you're thinking... I can't exactly talk on Corie's behalf, but we're in love. I love her. She is amazing, beautiful, kind, funny, sexy, and etc. She makes me happier than anyone or anything has. She makes me feel like all of my mistakes and problems don't matter. When we kiss it's like we're the only people in the world. She is the best thing that could ever happen to me. We have plans: college, dogs, a cat, marriage, kids, rocking chairs, and a lifetime together. I don't know how I went 14 years without that cheeky smile. All I know is that I'm ready to spend eternity right next to her...