For the love of Heaven (ON HOLD)

18|Confessions

2 days later (Wednesday)

Heaven

For the past few days days that I've been awake from my "coma" Omar's been here the entire time, sometimes he wouldn't even let anybody else come see me, it's almost like he had me quarantined from the world and after finding out what happened to me I don't blame him.

For the past two days the police have also been trying to talk to me but with all the nurses and doctors coming in and out and practically drugging me and sticking needles in me I'm alway incapable of answering any questions. I hated every second of being sedated because being asleep so much has brought me back to that night. Sometimes the dreams would occur in different scenarios, but all ending in Lucky on top of me and I would always remember voices but I wouldn't know who they belonged to, being grabbed and not knowing who's grabbing me. I even felt the pressure of being penetrated. I would wake up feeling paranoid, almost like he was watching me.

"Heaven!" I looked over next to me and Omar was there with the tray of hospital food in his hands.

"Yeah?"

"What's wrong I been calling your name for like 5 minutes."

I sighed "nothing's wrong."

He put the food in front of me and kissed my cheek.

I flinched in pain.

"Oh. I'm sorry." He said.

I put my head down "it's okay. Can you go get me some ice?"

"Sure baby girl." He walked out of the room. I couldn't help but began to sob.

I didn't mention this before but the last time I was sedated, I saw Omar in one of my dreams, he was holding my arms down.

Now, he wouldn't leave me alone, and it's causing me great anxiety, but apart of me believed he wouldn't do that to me but the voices in my head kept repeating themselves.

Omar isn't who you think he is

I wasn't sure of anything anymore. I didn't want to believe that Omar would do something like that, but then again we haven't been together that long and my dreams are haunting me even in the daytime.

After about five minutes Omar came back with a bag of ice and handed it to me. I placed it over the side of my face. He sat in the hospital seat next to my bed.

"The doctor said you should be released by Friday."

I nodded my head "I heard."

He just stared at me and it was really creeping me out.

"Why do you keep staring at me?" I asked.

He looked down "I'm sorry,"

I began to eat my food.

"I'm sorry I just don't like seeing you like this," He sighed "you didn't deserve what happened to you... at all."

A tear begin to stream down his cheek and though, I was practically afraid of him I immediately felt bad, I didn't want to see him cry. I extended my arm and placed my thumb under his eye and wiped his tear away. He grabbed my hand and just held it. I slowly pulled my hand away feeling uneasy about his touch.

Another tear followed the first. "I'm so sorry Heaven..."

I look at him "you don't have to keep apologizing.."

It was almost like he just ignored me and kept talking "I'm sorry I let that shit happen to you.."

"What? Let what happen?"