Protect Me|JungkookxBTS

,5

Jungkook pov
I haven't left my room all day. This morning Jin hyung asked me if I was ok, which meant Yoongi hyung told him what happened when I showed up last night. I was mad at Yoongi hyung, he's never cared about my well-being, so why does he care now?!

I stared at my phone which was lying on the bed next to me. It has been buzzing nonstop for the past hour. An unknown number kept calling me and texting me, I think it's Lee, but I'm to scared to check. How did he even get my number? I returned my attention back to the laptop sitting on my lap, the screen had turned off leaving behind a black mirror. Sadness consumed me as I stared at my reflection, I'm disgusting and pathetic. The small bite mark on my lip and the dull ache in my lower back constantly reminding me of that night. I felt tears start to sting my eyes and a lump forming in my throat, so I quickly shut the laptop and tossed it away from me. "Fuck." I cursed as the tears slowly cascaded down my pale cheeks. I'm so pathetic I can't even hold back tears. The tears fell harder when my stomach started aching from hunger, I haven't eaten anything all day. I was starving and I could smell Jin hyung cooking dinner, but I can't bring myself to leave this room. I wouldn't be able to handle all the questions the guys would ask me, or all the concerned stares they would give me. I don't want to make it awkward, so I'll stay in here and wait until everyone goes to bed.

I was staring at the wall when a bubbly and happy Taehyung burst into my room and jumped onto the bed. The action causing shooting pain to go up my spine. "Hey kookie!" Taehyung cheered happily as if he didn't have a care in the world, which I guess he didn't. "Hi Tae." I mumbled, I tried to smile as I said those words but it hurt to much. Taehyung must've noticed my mood because his happy smile faltered and turned into a confused gaze. "What's wrong kookie?" Taehyung asked, "you haven't left your room all day." I couldn't look at him, his pleading puppy eyes would definitely break me. "Nothing is wrong." I stated, keeping my eyes locked on the bed sheets. I heard Taehyung sigh, but he didn't leave. No. Instead he scooted up the bed and engulfed me in a hug, a warm hug, a strong hug. A protective hug. That familiar sting started forming in my eyes again as Taehyung held me, I can't cry. I'm not weak. "Kookie." Taehyung whispered against my neck, his deep voice was like honey, soothing the burning lump in my throat. "W-what?" I asked, right now I was glad he couldn't see my face. "You know you can tell me anything, right?" Taehyung asked, his voice sounded like he was on the verge of tears too. I nodded against his shoulder, I didn't trust my voice at the moment. "So when you're ready, please tell me what's wrong." Taehyung whispered, his words were muffled by my shoulder but I heard him loud and clear. It broke my heart, like literally my chest started to hurt the longer Taehyung held me. He thinks I don't trust him. All my hyungs probably think I don't trust them. I'm a terrible person.

I held back a whimper when Taehyung released me from his arms. Taehyung's eyes were red but he wasn't crying, instead he was wearing a small smile. I didn't know how I looked, but I definitely wasn't smiling. "Come on, let's go eat, the guys are waiting for you." Taehyung said happily as he grabbed my wrist and practically yanked me out of bed. I cringed in pain as Taehyung lead me out of my room and into the kitchen, all the members attention instantly on us. I wanted to curl up into a ball and die as I stared at all the concerned and pitiful looks I was getting from the hyungs. I want to go back to my room, I don't need to eat. But it was to late. Taehyung had already sat me down at the table, in between Yoongi and Jimin hyung. Great the two hyungs that are most worried about me. Everyone was silent as they stared at me, they were acting as if Taehyung had brought in a complete stranger. I must really look like shit. They can probably smell the sex on me, I'm disgusting.

"So Jungkook what did you do today?" Hoseok hyung finally asked, breaking that uncomfortable silence that was weighing on everybody's shoulders. "N-nothing." I mumbled, my voice still cracking from all the crying I've been doing. The hyung's expressions didn't change, all of them filled with concern, or pity. I can't really tell the difference. Suddenly the smell of Jin's cooking entered my nostrils and I couldn't stop myself from picking up my chopsticks and digging in. Hopefully me eating will reassure the hyungs that I'm fine. Slowly but surely the concerned faces of my hyungs shifted into small smiles as they all began to eat.

Dinner wasn't actually that bad. Everyone was finally talking and laughing, everything was back to normal. "Hey kookie do you want to come with me to the studio and practice?" Hoseok suddenly asked, all eyes instantly landing on me as they waited for my response. My stomach twisted into knots and that burning lump started forming in my throat at the mention of the studio. What if Lee is there? What if he catches me alone. What would he do this time? Probably fuck me until I passed out. He'd touch me again. Hurt me again. I don't like the pain. I don't like it. I want it to stop. Please make it stop.

"Jungkook are you okay?" Jin hyung asked, snapping me out of my mild panic attack and that's when I realized I was crying. All the hyungs were crowding around me, trying to see what was wrong and it was just..to much. I quickly pushed my chair away from the table and bolted into my room, making sure to lock the door behind me. My legs gave out on me as I slowly slid down the door, my breath hitching when my sore butt hit the ground. I couldn't hold back the sobs as they tore through my throat. I'm so pathetic. The hyungs probably hate me. "Jungkook open the door!" Yoongi hyung yelled from behind the wood, followed by pounding. "Open this door right now Jungkook!" Jin hyung yelled, "open the door kookie, please!" Taehyung yelled also. "Kookie we're sorry if we upset you!" Jimin yelled, him and Taehyung sounded like they were crying too. Slowly my hyungs yelling mixed with the pounding of their fists and all I could hear was a dull banging ringing in my ears. I just want everything to be normal.