For Life - EXO x YOU

XCVII - The Propensity of Love

Althea x Junmyeon

I had joined college recently at that time, and my 17-year-old mind was full of fantasies of the unknown world. Our teachers and elders in the family had declared that college life was full of surprises and above all, the phase where we would come face to face with the real world, as that was the time when we would be let free—out of our protective cocoons.

One of our classmates Althea soon became a dear friend of mine. She was an attractive-looking girl with a slim figure and a strange softness in her eyes that reflected the grace of innocence and inexperience.

For the first few months, she attended all the theory and practical classes diligently. Then suddenly she became very irregular, and at times she would disappear unnoticed from the class in between lectures. I wondered what was going on, but somehow did not feel the need to ask her about it.

One day I received a phone call from her.

'Hi! I wanted to speak to you. It's a bit urgent. I need your advice.' Althea said almost breathlessly.

It was really nice to know that someone was interested in having my advice.

'I'd been seeing Chanyeol for the past two years. Now, he is going abroad for higher studies and has asked me not to wait for him. What do you think about it?' Althea said these words in a rush and paused for my opinion.

It was a bit unexpected, and I did not know how to react or console her. As I had no experience about love, I thought it would be imprudent to suggest anything.

'I'm sorry to hear that.' I said with affable significance. 'Why? What happened all of a sudden?' I asked impatiently, unable to control my curiosity. Perhaps my query was not relevant for that moment, which I realized almost instantly after I had questioned her without expecting an answer.

'I don't know, Myeon. He loves me a lot. One of our common friends told me that he was crying after informing me about his decision. I think I should speak to him.' She noted seriously, still unable to get over her fascination and admiration for him, with a devout belief born of hope and faith in love.

'Yes, I feel the same way. May be he is feeling insecure.' I added encouragingly. But deep within I felt that Althea must cut off all ties with him, as he did not deserve her. I reasoned that a woman should do anything for love as long as the man was ready to take up all the responsibilities that came along with the serious relationship. Perhaps people who are in love think otherwise, and it was my inexperience about the subject that made me feel that way. I decided not to tell her what I thought would be the appropriate thing to do.

'I shall speak to him. I'll keep you informed.' Althea said before hanging up.

The following day Althea was not there in the class. In the evening, she called me up. Though I was a bit eager to know about her meeting with Chanyeol, but at the same time felt a little bored on hearing the repetition of the same thing all over again.

'I spoke to Chanyeol, Myeon but he wouldn't listen. He has made it very clear that he is no longer interested in me. He doesn't want me to wait for him.' Althea said as her voice choked with tears.

'Please don't be upset. He doesn't deserve you.' I blurted out in an angry and rebellious tone.

'You're right.' She became pensive and silent for a moment. 'That's why I slapped him before I officially ended the relationship!' Althea exclaimed sternly.

'You've done the right thing.' I nearly applauded.

She paused for a while before she yelled once again, 'But I love him so much, Myeon. My life is indissolubly connected with him. I can't live without him.'

'Are you sure you love him?' I asked all of a sudden, knowing not what to say.

'What do you mean?' My words infuriated her before she broke into one of those profound, heart-breaking sobs.

'No. I mean...' I felt agitated by her grief and also embarrassed about my insensitive behavior, and did not know how to make amends for the strong blow.

'I have no desire to live any longer, Myeon. I can't think of a life without him.' She continued in a calm voice without paying any heed to my earlier query. Again she started weeping inconsolably.

'Please be steady. Life is full of such type of tests and you have to conquer your difficulties and show your courage in moments of grief and sorrow.' I quickly said these words of wisdom that had been inculcated in me as a sacred verse by my parents.

'The time has come when you have to show the world how brave you are.' I felt great after saying this to her. I was suddenly seized by an unfamiliar range of sympathetic emotions that I failed to articulate into words of solace and comfort.

'I'll speak to you later on, Myeon.' She said all of a sudden and disconnected the phone.

For the next few days there was no news of her. I did not have the courage to call her up and enquire about her mental state. Though I was worried about her prolonged tension and the disquieting episodes that were gradually settling in her life and adversely affecting her studies and career, I knew that there was little I could do to help in that situation. At that time I felt that teenage love was not true and it was only a part of an infatuation that would go away with time. The event that followed afterwards proved that I was not altogether wrong.

I received a wedding invitation from Althea a few days later. I opened the invitation card quickly in order to check the name of the bridegroom. The name imprinted on the card was that of someone else and not Chanyeol.

I called up Althea to congratulate her.

'It's great to know that you are getting married.' I tried to sound genuine, though I felt a bit perturbed by her strange act.

'Yes. I decided to get married. I threatened my parents that I would commit suicide if they did not marry me off.' Althea said with an unusual firmness.

I did not dare to ask about Chanyeol, thinking that she might bang the phone. I was surprised by the way she had decided to handle the difficult situation that she'd faced a few days back. I wondered whether it was the delusion about life that was supposed to be an integral part of her teenage days, a conscious volition, or a sense of touching reasonableness which predominated and motivated her to take a step towards attaining the meaning of life in her own way that would eventually gather depth and volume as it would near fulfillment.

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