Falling In Love: Of All The Dumb Luck (On Hold)

Chapter 32

Kelsea:

My legs were cold against the seat. I shook all the way home.

I clicked the alarm on my phone and set the stick on the counter. I ran the warm water over my cold, shaking hands.

"Babe..." Jared called through the door.

"I'm coming." When I walked out of the bathroom, Jared was sitting on the bed staring quizzically at me.

"So?"

"It takes a few minutes. Relax." I said, sitting down next to him.

"Me? Look at you. You're still shaking."

I was. What if I was pregnant? What if we were going to have a baby?

Time crawled as if it were going to stop. The world was coming to an end, and crawled to a slow stop like a child's toy's batteries running out.

One blue line appeared on the little plastic screen. My heart broke. Sank down into a dark crevice. My shoulders slumped.

"It's negative."

"Are you sure? Maybe it just needs another minute." He said, eagerly, looking at the box.

"No, Jared. It's negative." I stood and tossed the stick in the small wicker garbage can in the bathroom. "Again." And stormed out of the room.

"Kelsea. Come on." He yelled, but I was already sliding on my shoes and running out the door. "Kelsea!"

I couldn't do it anymore. Not again. So I ran. I knew he was close behind me. He always was.

Tears streamed down my face. My whole body shuddered as I ran, making it difficult to breath. I pushed on. I felt every piece of anger burst through me. Pain. Anger. Frustration. Every step I took, I felt my body start to relax.

"Kelsea..." He started breathlessly. "I know this makes you feel better, but come on."

I slowed at his words.

"Thank God... We're twenty-six years old. I just got out of med school. You're working on your next book. It doesn't need to happen right now."

"You're right. I just..." My voice broke.

"Oh. Babe." He closed the space between us and wrapped his arms around me.

**********

"You're coffee's on the counter." I yelled from the kitchen.

"I'm so late." Jared rushed through the living room slinging his backpack over his shoulder. "Love you."

"Wait." I grabbed the mug off the counter and walked to the front door.

I pulled him in for a quick peck on the lips. "I love you, too." I squeezed his butt through his scrubs. "I love you."

"I love you, too. You better focus on your writing and not my ass."

"That's all I dream about. I'm meeting with my publisher to submit my final edit."

"Good luck."

"You too. Go save some lives."

"Will do. Bye, babe."

I tried to read over my final draft one last time, but I kept thinking about what Jared said the other night. I really don't want to be pregnant right now. If this book gets published, life is going to get even crazier. And Jared just started his surgical residency at Seattle General. Not a good time to have a baby.

I pushed Jared from my mind so I could focus before Mateo came over. He picked me up after "Love Lost... Almost" was published, which was right before the start of my junior year. And he helped me publish "Goodbye: From Me to You".