Growing up (Get Scared Fanfic)

Secrets have been Seen

Nick's POV.

Brad put on the movie the Lion King. I get the feeling he put in on as a joke, since most people think Disney movies are for little kids, but I honestly love this movie. It's a good story. I mean you get to watch Mufasa get murdered by his own brother. Simba is lead to believe it's his fault that his dad died and will live in guilt for years to come. He is forced to fend for himself and be taken in by total strangers. Plus there's fun songs. Hakuna Matata, right?

Just as the credits rolled, Brad smacked me in the face with a pillow, making me topple back. I sat up again, giving him a death glare.

"You agreed to this." he laughed.

"Does that mean we're going to talk about boys, too?" I questioned, "Cuz as surprising as it may be, I'm not gay." He hit me again with the pillow, this time I stayed sitting. "Why?" He proceeded to hit me again.  I grabbed the pillow out of his hands and used it against him. "Bad Bradley bad!" He grabbed another pillow with a rubbery edge from behind us and smacked me again. He got me right under my left eye, where it's bruised. "Ah fuck" I whined, turning away and holding down on my eye.

"Dude, I'm so sorry!" he apologized, dropping the pillow. 

"It's okay. I'm fine," I assured him. "Don't worry about it."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure." 

Later, he got hungry, so we went down stairs to find something for him to eat. He went inside his pantry and got out Twinkies. He handed me one.

"Food." he said.

"I'm not hungry," I lied, like always. I already broke by eating an apple yesterday. I handed back the Twinkie.

"Eat It!" He shouted in a weird voice. He opened the package and shoved it in my mouth. I moved out the way, refusing to eat. "Fine" 

Around two hours later, after doing the most random things possible, we sat in his room in total silence. I decided to keep my deal.

"So who do you like?" I asked.

"What the-"

"You said we'd talk about 'boys' but I'm assuming you're straight so, who do you like?" I explained. He looked at me with disappointment. You know that face of 'What is wrong with you?!' "I would tell you who I like, but I don't like anyone, cuz everyone hates me." He laughed.

"I don't really like anyone right now." He said.

"Sure Brad Sure."

"Are you hungry?" He asked me.

"No, I ate that Twinkie. Don't you remember."

"No you didn-"

"Shh. Yes I did." I cut him off. 

At just about 2 am we finally got tired and decided to 'sleep'. It's getting insanely hot in here and it doesn't help that I'm wearing a jacket. I can't take it off, or he might see my cuts. I laid in intense heat for about half an hour before I gave up in sleeping with it on. I took off my black jacket and threw towards my feet. I bet I'll wake before he does, so I'll just put it back on then. I cooled off enough to eventually fall asleep.

Brad's POV.

I woke up at 7:30 am. 5 hours asleep, not too bad. I turned over to where Nick was still sleeping on the other side of my room. I crawled over to him and sat right in front of him. I was just about to wake him up when something caught my eyes. His wrist is scarred up... This is probably why he didn't want to be in the pool. He didn't want anyone to know. He's becoming self-destructive, what if the next step is suicide. I can't lose this guy, he's probably the best friend I've ever had.  Calm down, maybe it isn't self harm. Maybe he just got scratched by a cat or something. Yeah right. It can't be anything else, what the hell causes marks like that. And that many too. I inhaled deeply, running my hand through my hair. Should I talk to him about it, or just pretend I never saw a thing? Should I wake him? Let's see how he reacts. If he's constantly trying to hide his wrist, it's self harm. If he acts cool and doesn't seem to care if I see it, then it's some other injury. No I'll just ask later. I don't want to seem creepy.

I backed up and hit something, causing a loud sound. He groaned to awareness. Crap Crap Crap! He'll  think I'm creepy and weird! His eyes widened at seeing me and he instantly tucked his arm under the sheets, concealing the damage. Dammit Nick. 

"Were you watching me sleep?" he questioned.

"No." I quickly answered, "Why would I do that?"

"I don't know," he said, "You do a lot of weird crap."

"Yeah" I kept glancing towards were his arm was. I think he noticed, because he looked uncomfortable. He sat up, keeping the covers over his left wrist. I need to talk to him. I can't just let him keep doing that to himself. "Nick?"

"Yeah"

"Do you.. um.. like .. you know?"

"No, I don't know."

"Do you... cut yourself?" I asked, very shyly. 

"Pfft. No." he said quickly.

I grabbed his arm from under the covers, seeing him wince. "Then what's this?" I asked, pointing to the cuts.

He pulled his arm back to his chest, the under part facing him. "Nothing. It's nothing."

"It's okay if you do, I won't-"

"I don't self harm, okay!" he cut me off.

"Tell me the truth." I demanded, looking at him dead in the eyes. 

"That is the truth. I don't self harm!" he stated again.

"Nick!"

"Brad!" he mocked. I raised my eyebrow. "Fine, then don't believe me!" He yelled. 

"I don't want you to do this again, okay" I said. He rolled his eyes and turned his back to me. "Please don't get pissed at me, I just want to help. I've never dealt with things like this before, so I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to do. I don't mean to be pushy, but I don't know what else to do. I'm just worried." 

"Don't be worried." He told me, keeping his back to me. I hate it when he says things like that. Why wouldn't I worry about him if I consider him my friend, if I have crippling anxiety that makes things seem worse than they probably are. What do you expect?

"You say that like you're okay."

"That's cuz I am." He responded.

"If you were okay, you wouldn't have suicidal thoughts, you wouldn't have such a low self esteem, you wouldn't have scars all over your arm. You wouldn't be so tired all the time, and you would sleep better. You would also be happier. Face it, Nick, you have depression."

"I'm not depressed! I don't cut! and I'm not starving myself!" He stated.

"I didn't say you starved yourself."

Nick's POV.

What have I done? Nice going you dumb fuck! 

"I didn't either. What are you talking about?" I nervously questioned.

"You just did. You said you don't starve yourself."

"Yeah. That's not saying I do" I responded. 

"But why would you have the need to say you don't if I didn't even accuse you of it?" He asked. 

"Stop interrogating me!" I shouted. Look what I got myself into. That was a stupid move. Now he's gonna know I do stupid crap to myself. I didn't want anyone to find out, I just want to be left alone to do whatever I wanted to do without being questioned and pitied. If you're gonna know I don't questions, I would rather be hugged or be told 'It's okay' even if it's not.

"I'm sorry Nick."

"It's fine. But please just don't. " I muttered.

"I can't just not. I'm not gonna ask again, but I will say this: You have no idea how much I care about you and your well being. You have no idea how much your parents care. You're a really cool guy, okay? I don't care if you think you're not, you are. So if you're hurting yourself in anyway, please don't continue doing it. I don't know what I'd do if you died. And just know that I'm always here for you."

I sighed, looking up at him, then at my feet. I felt my eyes start to water. Why the hell am I crying? I wiped my eyes before tears could stream down. "Thanks, Brad... Just... don't.. don't get too close to me." 

(A/N Thanks for 100 reads)