Shadowhunters Imagines

Remedy (Alec x Reader) Imagine

"I killed her" you heard someone say as you walked into your bedroom. Who would be in there? You quietly look around and you could tell that your bathroom door was open. Walking over to it, you placed your hand over the knob taking a breath before you open the door. Not really knowing who or what was going to be on the other side of the door.

"Alec" You saw him when you opened the door, he was balled up in the corner of the bathroom by the shower. It was a different side for you to see, this strong boy was now there broken right there in front of you. You just stared at him not knowing what to do until your eyes caught something. His hands were covered in blood.

"Alec are you alright?' You bended over to meet his eye level.

"Alec" You spoke once again, laying your hand on his cheek. Slowly you pulled his head up from in between his legs. He looked so broken, tears were running down his face and you could see the pain in his eyes. Your heart broke at the slight of your lover in so much misery. Alec leaned over to you putting his head in your lap knowing he was safe there.

"You going to tell me what happened?" Running your hand through Alec hair knowing that would calm him a down a bit maybe even stop crying.

"I killed her" Alec whispered and started to let the tears fall from his eyes again.

"Kill who Alec?" No way this boy in front of you could kill someone out of the goodness of his heart. It wasn't possible Alec wasn't that type of person.

"Alec who?" You demanded, you needed to know so you could help. Him not answering wasn't going to work.

"Jocelyn" You gasped, but you didn't let you sacred you there had to be a good reason why. You looked down at Alec's face waiting for him to continue because you weren't sure what to say.

"Demon" You knew then when Alec said that, that he had to be one of the victims that the demon possessed while it was here. "Alec, you had no choice it wasn't you that did it. It was that sick demon, everyone will understand when you tell them."

"No!" Alec shouted as he jumped up. "I killed one of us. One of our friend's mother." It was silence for a moment until Alec continue "Clary she umm she found me already" Tears were falling down both of your guys cheeks now. "She told me she hated me before but now it was different. I killed her mother the only person she ever truly had. You didn't see the anger in her eyes when she spoke." Alec turned not wanting to see your face. "She wanted to kill me and I would of let her if she tried. I don't deserve this life anymore and I damn well don't deserve you"

"Alec" Your voice was breaking as you got up to turned Alec around. "Don't you say that"

"Why it's true, you shouldn't love a killer of the innocent"

"Alec look at me" Pulling his face down to your level you looked straight in his eyes and said "That wasn't you and we all know that. What Clary said was out of anger but not at you. She angry with this world and how she was throw in to it. It's changing her whole life plus also losing your mother will make you hurt and upset wanting to hurt everything in your path. Trust me I know. This isn't going to change how people look at you Alec" Tears were rolling down your cheeks, how couldn't he see that you loved with every ounce of your living self.

"I hate myself" He whispered closing his eyes.

"You will until you forgive yourself." You put both your hands on his cheeks giving him a quick kiss. "And I will be here every step of the way until you learn to love what I do." Alec opened his eyes and look into yours he knew then if he had you by his side he could get through this nightmare part of his life.