Forever In Your Arms [Andy Biersack Love Story]

Now I Know My Wounds Are Sown, Because Of Who You Are

The rest of that night was blur. It was as if I was watching a movie, it never fully penetrated me that this was real life. My mind wouldn't let it. But my body knew. It ached, knowing that the man I love is laying in a bed with machines hooked up to him with doctors surrounding him to see how severe the injury was.

I sat on the floor right outside his door. Everytime a nurse walked by me I was told to go to the waiting room, but I refused. I couldn't bear to be that far away from him right now. Even this one wall was too much of an obstacle.

I knew that injury wouldn't kill him, it hit his lower leg, but I'm not a doctor. Either way, I'm still fearing for his life. I've never felt so strongly about something, but it was almost as if our lives were connected. He dies. I die. I knew he wasn't going to, but if it happened, I would too.

I heard him scream in pain, it shocked my body. It broke my heart, I just want to go in and hold his hand, to see his eyes, but at the same time, I'm questioning if I wanted to see him in so much pain. How much would it hurt myself? Either way, I'd do it, because I needed to be by him, He needed me to be by him.

I looked down and saw the bandage on my arm, I untaped it, and glanced down at the tattoo. This was ours. I could still see the slight red of the blood shining through, but it was the least of my worries.

I heard a click of a doorknob, and I glanced up. A man with blue scrubs came out, he glanced around, and then looked down. He reached down towards me, "Would you like to come and see him?" I took his hand and stood up. I stopped for a second before crossing the threshold of what I once knew, and what I've been waiting to know.

I took that step, and I didn't know if I could hold myself together. I rushed over to him, and just stood there, looking down. He looked up at me and gave me a weak smile. I half-heartedly smiled back at him, and he reached up and stroke my face.

The doctor called me over. "Look," he said in a hushed tone so Andy couldn't hear, "the bullet is lodged in his leg. He is required to stay overnight, and tomorrow we're going to have to surgically remove it." I let it soak in, it wasn't traumatic news, but it definately was not a ray of sunshine. "Since he has to stay overnight, you're welcome to stay. Unfortunately, we do not have beds for guests that aren't patients, but we can bring in a chair. It's the best we can do."

I nodded my head quickly, "Comfortability is the last of my worries. Thank you doctor. I just...thank you."

I returned to Andy's bedside. He looked back at me, "Well, you look like a ray of sunshine." He gave me his side smile and coughed.

The door opened and a male nurse sat a chair down next to Andy's bed. He gave us a smile and nod and walked towards the door, he then stopped and turned around, "You'll be getting your morphine dose soon," then he shifted his glance to me, "he'll fall asleep, so we'll bring in an extra blanket when we come back." I nodded my head in thanks.

I returned my gaze to Andy's face, his eyes had never left my face. He grabbed my hand, I could feel the pulse monitor. We sat there like this for a minute or two.

"So that tattoo," he said, brushing his hand over my tattoo, "doozy isn't it."

I sighed, "Thank you."

He gave me a quizzical look, "For what?"

I laughed lightly, "Who knows what would've happened if you didn't do what you did. Andy, I was so scared, but what I felt when I saw you injured felt worse than anything I could ever imagine. It's something that I never want to feel again. Seeing you there, injured, it killed a small part of me. I..." I felt a tear down my cheek and he shooshed me.

He squeezed my hand, "I'd take a million bullets in the leg, aslong as you were alive and safe. I wouldn't matter. I'd die for you. I love you more than anything, more than music, more than the band. You may not realize this, but you are my life. You are the reason I breathe, and I won't stop loving you until this world ends. Forever and infinity." he rubbed his thumb over my hand.

I started crying, "I...I love you so much. I don't think I could live without you here with me, and I don't understand how I did it before."

The male nurse returned, "Alright, say goodnight."

Andy looked up at me and said, "Sweet dreams, sugarplum."

I smiled, "Goodnight, baby."

The male nurse injected stuff into Andy's IV and handed me a blanket. He nodded and left.

I sat down, and covered myself up. I looked at Andy, and he had his head turned so he was looking at me. We sat there staring into eachothers eyes. Soon the meds were kicking in and Andy's eyes were drifting. I watched him until his breathing slowed and be was deep in sleep. I allowed myself to close my eyes. To take that risk, to take my eyes off of him just to sleep.