I'm Sorry | Jackson Wang

17: To Get Away Pt. 1

Luna

I mechanically flip through the channels, hoping for some sort of mindless entertainment for the night. After Jackson left me to go to practice, I've been bored stiff.
My mind has been wandering back to my hopeless love life (life in general, but mostly just my love life), and it makes me feel shitty. And I can't talk to anyone about it, since they all seem to have a life outside of their typical, mundane, weekly routine.
Losers.
But obviously I don't, that's why I'm sitting on my couch with a tub of chocolate ice cream watching dramas and procrastinating my workout.
Suddenly my phone buzzes on the coffee table in front of me, so, being the technology overridden millennial I am, I reach for it out of habit and press the answer button.
"Hello?"
"Yeah, um, Luna?" Wait, is this... no... it can't be... I think.
"Yes...?"
"Uh... can you um... open the door for me, please?"
I instantaneously toss my ice cream on the coffee table, rip the blankets off of me, run toward the door, trip over my cat and manage to unlock the door in 30 seconds.
"Hi.." I say to him, attempting to fix what I assume is my disaster face and body. I guess my clothing choice wasn't the best, either.. is that a choco- nevermind, I just look bad, okay?
"Um.. can I come in? I'm really cold.." He looks at me sheepishly, all that's missing is him rubbing the back of neck, but his hands are jammed in his coat pockets.
"Oh, yeah, come on in." I move aside to let him in.
As he steps into the heated house, he exhales heavily, almost as if in relief from the cold.
"God, thank you, Luna. I really owe you one.." Jackson unwraps his scarf from around his neck. "Like really, I don't know what I would've done if you wouldn't have let me in, haha."
"Um, you wanna maybe take your shoes and coat off? I can get you a couple blankets, some tea, maybe?"
"Uh, yeah, sure, that'd be nice."
"Alright, just uh.. make yourself comfortable on the couch, there."
He gets his coat off and nods at me. "Okay, thank you."
I nod and walk off to the kitchen, quickly checking my reflection in the little mirror on the wall, seeing I wasn't as bad off as I thought, thank God.
But then again, I don't look great on an average day.
I quick put some water in a kettle and set it on the burner, turning it on, then I run up to my room and change from my pajama shorts to a pair of baggy sweats and run back down to the water.
I place two tea bags into some cups I put on the counter and pour the hot water into them. I walk out with the mugs in hand, setting one in front of Jackson and keeping the other to myself as I place myself next to him on the couch.
"Thank you, again."
I press my lips into a tight line, "No problem." A silence passes over us. "So.."
"So.."
"Why'd you come here? Don't you have practice?"
"Yeah.. it was getting a little crowded, and we were done done hours ago. I just needed a break."
"Oh.." I shift back and forth from the balls of my feet to my heels, my arms on my knees and my mug resting between my hands. "So why here, of all places? I didn't believe we were that close," I attempt to joke.
"No one will look for me here. And, well... I don't really know. My feet just kinda... took me here. Weird, huh?"
"Haha, yeah, weird..." we both awkwardly sip from our mugs.
"So- uh.. I noticed your cat.."
"Oh," I chuckle, "yeah. Her name is Hana, like the number. One of the girls wanted to name her Hanna, but we thought it'd be funny as a play on words.."
"Oh?" He scooches closer to me, placing his mug on the coffee table.
"Yeah, like "hana", one, as in were going to have so many cats we're going to need to number them."
"Ah.. well, thank you for the tea... do you have any alcohol?"
"Uh..." I get up to go to the kitchen, "maybe. I think Sulli got a bottle of wine earlier this week..."
When I locate the bottle and an opener and a couple of glasses, I return to the living room. "This okay?"
"Perfect, thank you."

I calm down from my giggle fit from the story Jackson told me about Bambam and Mark. "That was funny."
"Haha, yeah... so... do you remember that night in high school after that party...? Sasha kissed me, then we-"
To avoid him bringing that night up, I interrupt him. "Yes."
"That was the best night of my life, honestly," he drawls, taking a swig from his glass. "I wish things could go back to the way they were... I really love you, you know that?"
"Well, I did too-" I start, but then process what he said. "Wait, you said 'love', which implies you still love me..."
Jackson stays silent with that.
"Do you?"