Diary?

Again.,

Here I am again losing sleep over you. Running through my mind non stop like a fish never stops swimming. It's always in motion like every thought I have of you. But why is it that every time I see you I find myself doing dumb things? Why is it that when I look at you I always find myself being captivated by your perfect imperfections? Why do I always dream of us being together when I know you don't feel the same... Are you afraid of commitment or are you afraid of getting hurt? I don't understand how you are so amazing yet no other girl seems interested the same way I am (that I am aware of). I need to know do we have a chance. I need to know what the stars have written for us because only they know what will become. I want to know do you even feel the same way I do when we touch or look each other in the eyes. The way I feel when you say my name. The way the shapes of the letters engulf me in a burning passion that burns in my chest. Why is it that I can feel such great passion but you seem to not feel anything. Is it because you don't like me? Is it because you're afraid of what can be? Or is it because you're ashamed of liking someone like me? Someone who isn't beautiful in the eyes of society. I just feel this sensation but do you feel the same? You can take this heart lover boy. Heal it or break it apart. Only you can decide where this goes. I've watched how you've changed but now I just want us to grow to our full potential. That's all I want. If you aren't for me well I know it will hurt but I would do anything to see you happy... even if that means I have to sacrifice my happiness. Lover boy why can't you see this... maybe this will be the last time I write to you. Lover boy please just give me a sign. I wish I could have you in my arms and tell you how amazing you are. I know how cliche this is but I feel like you are the missing piece to me. I want to say I'm in love but I can't. I'm yours but you are not mine. I'm tired of hiding the fact that I want there to be an us. I want to be able to hold your hand, be there for you til the end of times. Why can't it be like that. I wish it could be like that. Why can't this dream be come a reality and instead of it being a you and me it could be an us or we. Lover boy... One day I'll show you these entries and maybe you'll find out that I'm writing about you... but tell me something lover boy. Can there ever be an us or we?