TAMPONS | PHAN

six; may

m a y;

"I think it's nice you're doing this for Kate, I mean you don't have to," said Mitch and Dan stared at him.

"Mitch it's been seven months," Dan deadpanned and Mitch's eyes widened.

"Has it? Break up with her already! God, monogamous relationships at this point in life are such a bore, you might as well be married," Mitch scoffed inspecting his nails as Dan pulled into the parking lot.

"It'd be like dating Charlie," said Dan and Mitch rolled his eyes.

"Girl, I've been there and done that," commented Mitch and when Dan stared at him in utter shock he added, "What do you think I did Valentine's Day night?"

Dan just blinked, at an utter loss for words. He ensured that he had locked his car twice, before slipping the keys into his pocket and heading towards the entrance of the shop.

"Don't act so shocked!" exclaimed Mitch, stepping gingerly around a pile of broken glass. He looked very much out of his element in his bright red Doc-Martens and grey cashmere sweater that clung around his knees. "I totally would have gotten with you, had you not been straight."

"That's the thing – "

"Danny!" Dan's statement was cut off by a joyful cry from Phil, who flung himself on Dan the moment they stepped into the slightly chilled atmosphere of the shop. It took one glance from Mitch to know that he wasn't going to drop the subject that they had been discussing earlier.

"Hi!" exclaimed Mitch once Dan had extracted himself from Phil's embrace. He gave Phil a quick hug, not minding the fact that he didn't know him.

"Hello I'm Phil." Phil introduced himself, smiling at Mitch.

"Mitch Bachman, though I'm sure you've heard all about me," said Mitch dramatically and Phil shot an anxious look to Dan, who indicated for him to nod.

"Erm... yeah loads," said Phil unconvincingly.

"I'm hurt," pouted Mitch, "Though to be fair Dan didn't exactly say anything about a sexy shop clerk." The two turned to Dan who blushed.

"Well you've met now..." he said weakly and Mitch rolled his eyes.

"We need tampons Philly and we need them stat!" he declared loudly, attracting the attention of many nearby shoppers.

"Mitch!" Dan hissed, trying to hide behind a stack of cards to avoid the embarrassment. He succeeded only in tipping it over, causing a flow of birthday cards, greeting cards, and thank you cards to swarm around his feet like ants to a sandwich.

"Daniel!" Mitch mocked. "Look what you've done now!" he exclaimed gesturing to the pile of paper that had cascaded to the ground.

"Fuck, sorry" said Dan getting to his knees and beginning to scoop piles of cards towards him. Mitch and Phil copied his actions until they were all left with disorderly piles of slightly dusty cards.

"Just put them back wherever" said Phil attempting to straighten his pile. Mitch shrugged shoving a card that read 'Congratulations!' into a 'Sorry for your loss' slot. They spent a couple minutes slotting the cards haphazardly until finally Dan placed his last card on the rack.

"How can I be of service?" asked Phil turning to Mitch who grinned.

"Well Kate's sick so we need some get well thing. Fuzzy socks, tissues, cough drops, sweets, tea, movies, and tampons 'cause she's also surfing the red wave. Then we need a bunch of cinnamon flavoured sweets for myself and Daniel can get what ever." said Mitch rapidly and Phil nodded grabbing a basket from a nearby stack.