Last December (VictUri)

Chapter 12: Last December

Epilogue...

Tears can't mend a broken heart. Trust me, I have tried crying it all away but pain still is throbbing deep down within. There is only so much you can cry about before it all goes dry and you are stuck looking black with a feeling of nothing.

To lose someone that you love will alter your life forever. Yes, the pain will eventually stop because nothing lasts forever, there will be new people but that gap shall never close. There is a hole in my heart that seems to not want to close and no matter how much happy things I try to shove into it, it is like nothing seems to fit. Like when a child attempts to put the circle in the square hole. It just doesn't work.

If I could only have him back...Just for a little while, I'd make sure to let him know my feelings. I'd kiss him but slap him after cause he lied. Then I'd kiss him again because I wouldn't wish to ever hurt that man. Sadly, the universe didn't allow it this way. See, I don't

thing things happen for a reason. I don't think there is such thing as karma. Whatever is coming to you is coming to you. Fate is fate and you can't change damn thing.

For all you suckers who think that you can change your fate by fixing the now, don't like it yourself. Everything that is planned for you to happen, will most certainly happen. It is a never escaping bullet no matter how much you try to dodge or block it.

-

The last time I wore a suit like this, it was because of my mom's funeral. I never thought I'd wear it again but...Oh well,.

And just to take a pause, did you really think he'd live? Did you all think that Viktor would live? Even I knew he would fucking die and I loved him anyways. This is a cancer story, get over yourself. You see, when you love someone, pain is kinda part of the package. No matter how much you try and avoid it.

Ahem. Anyways.

Today is Viktor's wake and I am standing in the bathroom of the funeral home, doing my best to keep it together. A wake is an open casket. One where I can see the face I loved so much. And I don't think I can handle it.

"Yuri? They're waiting..." A voice said behind me. Looking to see, it was Yurio. He did his best to avoid eye contact. I knew he was in pain. Everyone was. Just because I didn't like to see the guy so upset, I ignored all other bad feelings towards him and hugged the boy.

That had been the first time I ever seen and heard Yurio sob like that....

After heading into the room where Viktor's casket was, I realized how almost nobody surrounded it. Like they made a walkway for me to get there. Yes, people stared at me as I walked to the lifeless body in a box but I didn't care. I couldn't see them. The only thing I could see was that casket and Viktor inside of it.

"Idiot.." I mumbled and smiled through the tears. I reached in and grabbed his hand. Cold. So cold. Not the warmth from awhile ago that I had remembered.

However, feeling around on his hand, I noticed something.

"His ring...Where is his ring?!" I shouted and got a few confused gazes from the people.

"Where the fuck is his ring, he needs it! He needs his ring! Give him his ring! H-He can't be buried without it!" I said, my shouts soon turning into sobs as I sunk down in front of the coffin. Minami, of all the people in that room, was the only one to try and get me out of there.

"Hey, it's okay. Let's go get some a-" The boy tried to say but I cut him off.

"No! I'm going alone.." I hissed and wiped the tears from my eyes. Outside. That seemed good.

After the whole show I had made, nobody followed me out there. I'm sire that they know I needed some time alone and I'd be damned if someone bothered me.

Speaking of someone bothering me, I heard a voice.

"Yuri!!! Boy do I have a question for you!" It called out.

Not just any voice, Viktor's voice. And it felt so real...Like I could reach out and touch it.

Looking around, I seen nothing. Yep, knew I had gone insane. However, off in the far far distance, I seen a glimpse of that long silver hair. Viktor never had long silver hair. Well, he did, but not when I met him. Yeah, I knew this was bad idea but I proceeded to follow.

When I got up, it was like 'Viktor' began to run away. Even in my hallucinations you wish to leave me?

"Viktor...Come back.." I said, chasing after the boy.

As he turned to look over his shoulder at me, I seen the smile. The smile I had loved so dearly. But before I knew it, he had faded into nothing and I was left standing alone.

Again.

"I'm an idiot.." I mumbled to myself and sat at the base of a nearby tree, resting my head against it. A lovely humid spring breeze blew by and the petals from the tree above began to fall.

Citrus.

They smelled of citrus.

Looking up, I felt tears brim my eyes.

An orange blossom tree.

Viktor, did you wish for me to see this?

I hope you know what those trees mean, my love. Because they mean eternal love.... Right after the winter and cold is over, they begin to take life. The eternal love I had for you shall never leave. We may not have been married but the saying til death do us part still remains strong to me. And even if I couldn't say it, just know....I love you Viktor Nikiforov.

-

10 months later....

"Yuri come on!" Minami called as I laced up my skates, a determined grin on my face. The first big snow of December and I decided it was time to return to the rink. Minami, Yurio, and Yurio's recently named boyfriend Otabek have been hanging out for the past few months.

And let me tell you, I feel happy.

This death wasn't like my mothers. I feel empowered. Empowered to never put my skates back and keep a smile on my face. It is what he would have wanted...Right? There was no use in mopping, I couldn't bring him back and I didn't plan to join him all that soon.

And even though my life will go on, I will never forget what all happened Last December....  

~~~

My lovies, it has been a long ride... Thank you so much for all the votes and comments and all that stuff. It has truly made me a better writer. As for what I am writing next, you all can choose. Please make sure to follow me to keep up with updates because I may create a spinoff of this or a whole new story. List some ideas of what you would want in a story if I were to write another in the comments. I love you all sm, but for now...PEACEEEEE