Deep Down

1

Song: Two Weeks- Grizzly Bear

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I am so very tired.

So very tired of my mothers New Wave eighties music. Of my brothers constant assault on my ego. My dog's endless drooling, and my fathers unnecessary singing.All in all I am so very tired of our road trip.

Impatiently and even somewhat aggressively, I drum my fingers against my knee. The bass in the car is turned up so loud that I can feel my heart begin pumping out blood to its rhythm. Video Killed The Radio Star comes blasting through my brothers self-installed speakers. You know when your family has inside jokes? Not even because you find each other funny or like-able, but because you've all been shoved into a situation where living at close quarters is your reality. Well this song is like our inside joke. Our hype track, and my whole family starts bumpin' it to Video Killed The Radio Star at 7:47 pm on a Sunday night, heading towards the middle of nowhere.

An hour after our mini karaoke sesh, we pull into the longest and  most dangerous driveway I will ever face. Even though the leaves are still clinging to tress in dark colors of red and brown, the ice of Canadian winter has frosted the roads. And it's seeming to stick to my grandmothers driveway of all places. The house is old, as old as expected considering she's like 90 something. When I step out of our truck and onto the ground, I notice that her house is now a modern black color. Which suits my tastes fine indeed.

"It's nice, don't you like it guys?" My mother asks hesitantly. My brother Amon grunts as he gathers his belongings from the back of the truck.  

"Joan? Give me a hand wouldja?" My dad calls to me from the other side of the truck. No- he was not beckoning to my Grandmother although the name would be fitting of a 90 year old woman.

Amon comes to his help instead and I decide to try and wrangle our doggy since he wants to be difficult.

"Mick-mick!" I hear his panting through the darkness, even with the heavy winds. A leaf flies through the air and hits me in the face. My father scolds me when I curse. Mick-mick is barking endlessly and I want to throw the fallen branch at my feet in his direction. You know, In case Slenderman is out there. Before my dumb ass can do anything reckless, I hear the front door opening behind me. A small head peaks out, a mass of browns curls falling over a bony shoulder. A smile stretches across the girls face as she beholds my family. I approach her with excitement and she timidly says her 'hello Joanie.' Behind her, my grandmother appears. She places a shaky hand on her tiny foster child's shoulder. I behold her gentle smile as she greets me in her own way of exitment. We hug and I hold tighter than I  should, until my family catches up to me at the door. "I've missed you my love... I swear you get shorter everyday," she whispers before moving on to greet the rest of my family.

Amon makes a speedy escape to his room and I decide since he did it first that I am now allowed to do it as well. I scale the rickety staircase after stealing a cookie from her cupboard. Halfway up the stairs I hear small footsteps behind me. Myana; my grandmothers small and relatively new foster child looks toward me. We've met before, many times, although she can't seem to shake her shyness. I give her a winning smile.

"Hey kid," I hike my backpack farther up my shoulder. "You coming or not?" I begin waking and smile as I hear her footsteps behind me once again.

I pass my parents designated room, as well as my brothers. Myana has a small room right beside mine, with almost identical princess sheets to my own. I turn on the light to my room and drop my backpack on the carpeted floor, trying not to acknowledge the cloud of dust that becomes airborne. Myana strolls into my room as if she owns the place and sits herself on my bed. I peer around at the old, dusted books on the bookshelf to my left. Catching a glimpse of myself in the circular mirror ahead of me, I stick my tongue out.

Ew.

"I like your room Joanie... it's pretty and there's so much to read."

I turn my gaze to the small child on the bed, shaking her feet out in front of her as if she can't contain her energy. She seems so young and full of life, despite having been dragged out of a burning house not eight months ago. Her parents didn't have as much luck as her. A reminder of what has happened is forever scarred on her skin, as her small burned hands will never be fixed.

I smile at her.

"You can read here anytime you want," I seat myself on the bed next to her.

She asks me to read her a story right now and I agree warily. Despite being in love with this kid, all I want to do is get some damn sleep. After awhile my grandmother comes up to put her to bed. With a little resistance she finally complies, and my granny kisses us both on the forehead. Myana retreats to her small room and I let out a sigh. I fall onto the bed dramatically, thinking of the next month to come.

A month is a long time. A month is the amount of time it would take me to finally find a job back home, or get a hot boyfriend. But instead my father decide to give the middle finger to his boss during a meeting. Which landed us poorer than we expected and him on the hunt for another job. We left our house hours away so that he could find a job in this tiny village, though I highly doubt there are any opportunities for him here. Or the rest of the family for that matter. Two days from now I'll start at a new school; smack dab in the middle of the school year. Whereas Amon will get to sit on his ass all day filling out college applications. I make an obnoxious noise through my mouth and decide that I'm better off sticking with the only person I know here; the neighbor.

When I was young, as young as Myana, my best friend was a little boy who lived across the street from this house. Every time I visited we would make forts out of sticks or his father would take us on the four wheeler. I have so many fond memories of him but I can't at all remember what he looked like. I can't even remember If he lives here anymore. His name was Garner and I swear to god he was the craziest little shit I've ever seen. I would dare him to do anything and he follow through with finesse. Which included mooning an innocent hiker in the middle of the forest. I make a note to try and get the guts to visit him tomorrow.

Which leaves me one more day until school starts after that.

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Okay there boyssss. If ur coming in from my other story 'Pistol' I'd like to say hello old Friend but if you just stumbled upon this out of nowhere I would like to say HAVE FUN WITH THIS MOTHERFUCKER.

Gonna put this out there for fun and im not sure if I'll be doing regular updates yet so just you wait and see.

Y'all don't even read the story if ur not gonna jam to my tunes.

🍑