WILD // (Harry Styles)

E I G H T E E N

CHAPTER 18 + Q&A

CLAIRE

"Are you absolutely sure?" Louis asks for the hundredth time as the car slows down, entering the parking lot. I look over at Harry, who's eyes are still filled with desperation. I blink, wondering how someone can want me this much.

I can't really grasp the idea of missing a whole year of my life. According to Harry, I'm turning 17 in a week. One minute, I was living in London with my parents, going to school like a normal 15 year old. The next, I'm a high school drop-out living with my 22 year old boyfriend in New York. It's just... a lot to take in.

I don't know what the last thing I remember is. I remember being in my room, flipping through trashy magazines with Michael. But I don't have a definitive last memory. Must be the effects of the drug.

"Louis, I have lost a year of my life. So whatever I can do to remember it, I'm doing it." I say, laying my palm flat on my thigh, like I'm standing my ground. Louis frowns, but nods slightly.

I wanted to go home to England. When I woke up and realized I had been kidnapped and had my memories drugged away, I wanted to lock myself in my old room and cry. Have Michael there too, to comfort me.

Even when Louis offered his hotel room I wanted to go there instead, I didn't want to go live with a stranger. But I changed my mind.

When I really let Harry look me in the eyes, put my hand in his... I don't know... I believed him. I believed him when he said I loved him.

It was weird, it was like I had no choice. My whole body wouldn't allow me to say no to him. I don't know him, and he still had that effect on me, so I have to believe there's something there.

"You ready?" Harry asks, grabbing my bad off my lap. I nod, giving a hug to Louis.

"Bye," I whisper, and he hugs me tightly. Almost for too long, like he doesn't want to let me go. I pat his back for him to loosen his grip, and he pouts as I back away and get out of the car.

I feel a hand grab mine when I close to the door, causing me to jerk my hand away. I look to my side, and Harry's eyes widen.

"I- I'm sorry, it's a habit," he apologizes, shaking his head.

His brows middle-raise, and I instantly feel bad.

"D- don't worry about it" I stutter, sort of set back. I stare for a few seconds before I clear my throat, walking towards the entrance. I hear Harry sigh with frustration behind me, which I understand. I mean, supposedly we've been in a 4 month committed relationship. Of course it comes natural to hold my hand.

I get into the lobby and I notice my shoes clink against the shiny white marble floor. Wow. We get into the elevator, and it's dead silent. I don't know what to say to him. Sorry I don't remember you?

"Are you hungry? Can I get you anything?" he asks as the doors slide open. I step into the apartment and my bag falls to the floor. My mouth falls open as I look around.

"Woah. You have a nice place," I say, gazing at the gleaming lights from the city. He freezes for a second, turning around to me.

"We have a nice place," he corrects me, and he is about to put his hands on my hips. He freezes again, stopping himself.

I would think Harry Styles would have no trouble talking to girls, but he seems... nervous.

"Right." I try to smile at him. Foreign tingles shoot through me when I imagine what it would be like if he hadn't stopped. I've never been touched like that. He's still standing right in front of me, looking into my eyes and his arms are slowly going to his sides.