Confessions of a Drug Dealers GF

Chapter 3

NaNa hadn't said one word to me on the way back to Dj's house. I hadn't spoke much either, just a bunch of I'm fine's. NaNa had this look on her face like she knew something she wished she didn't. That made my stomach hurt worse. We get to Dj's house and I'm not ready for the news I'm about to hear. What if they tell me that my boyfriend, my baby, the love of my life was dead. The thought made me shiver. My hands were so sweaty. Marlon is sitting in a chair outside Dj's front door. He has his head in his hands. JonJon is pacing back and forth. I'm almost sure I was going to throw up again. As soon as JonJon sees me he starts to apologize. My eyes tear up, these idiots got my baby killed.
"He got arrested Strawberry" I blankly stare at him. At that exact moment I felt psychotic. I laughed but there was no expression of amusement on my face. I could hear my blood boil. I was sure I was completely red right now.
"It was supposed to go smooth. We make this drop then go hit a lick" JonJon says. Boiling hot.
"Man them pussy ass nigga set us up" Marlon says. Steaming hot.
"I never seen so many cops come so quickly" JonJon says. Piping hot.
My boyfriend doesn't sell drugs. He doesn't hit any fucking licks. He isn't Marlon and JonJon. Why the fuck are they lying to me right now? I think it would make more sense for him to be dead right now, but locked up? No.
"How did he get arrested and y'all didn't?" I asked. Because these two were the gang banging ass drug dealers. NOT Dj. Nothing was making sense. He told me he was going to talk to a man about scholarships. Why would he lie to me? When did he start selling drugs. Marlon and JonJon go back and forth explaining to me that the police only wanted Dj and how they had been building a case against him for awhile now. None of this still made sense. I left them outside in mid conversation and I go inside his house to find his mother.
"No dammit! Tell me where the hell you have my son! No I won't calm down. I'll show y'all a calm down! He is my damn son! I don't give a fuck! That's what I thought motherfucka!" She slams the phone down.
"Did you know about this shit?" She asked me. I swallowed what seemed to be the biggest thing of spit ever.
"No ma'am" I managed to say. I think she was in a worse off predicament than I was. She lost her son to the streets. I'm sure she was kicking herself and thinking about how Dj was going to end up just like his daddy; serving a life sentence. My oldest brother Smoke would always tell me about how Dj's daddy was the biggest dope peddler in the city. Everyday was a holiday to his customers. Dolly and momma knew him too. They said he was the finest brother walking. He was tall, dark and handsome like Dj. He was so smooth and always clean. He wasn't the kind to dip in his own supply. He had a gang of beautiful woman following him, opening up theirs kitchens to cook up his drugs. But he only had eyes for Ms. Deborah. Dj told me his father got locked up on his fifth birthday. He would always tell me he wanted to be a better man than his father. He said he was gonna be somebody special.
"I just don't know where I went wrong" Ms. Deborah cried. All I could do was look at her. She was a great mom to Dj. She worked hard to make sure he wanted for nothing. I know he loved his mom more than anything in the world. Because he treats his mom so good, I knew he'd treat me good. I walked over to the counter that she was leaning on and I placed my hand on top of hers. I tried to speak but nothing came out of my mouth. I felt like I wanted to cry and throw up at the same time. I thought I would pass out. I was so angry. He told me he was going to talk about scholarships. Ms. Deborah's house phone rings again. We both freeze as we look at it. She answers.
"Hello? Shit. I'm on my way."
"Is it Dj? Can I come too?" I ask.
"Stay here with your friends, I'm bringing Marlon and JonJon with me" I didn't want to stay there. I wanted to see my boyfriend. I wanted to know what the hell was going on. I was going to throw up again. I excused myself to the bathroom.
As I looked in the mirror I noticed how puffy my eyes were and how pale my face looked. I looked dead. I felt dead. Whatever it is that Dj did, I hoped it's something that he can get off with a warning. We have goals we had to accomplish and I had something I really needed to tell him. Sway walks in the bathroom and closes the door behind her.
"Are you gonna keep it?" What. Except I didn't say it out loud. She continued to stare at me. I wanted to answer her but instead of words coming up, vomit. Sway held my hair back as I continued to throw up in the toilet. This shit is so embarrassing and so not how I wanted anybody to find out.
"Are you gonna tell him? What you gonna do?"
"I don't know. I don't seem to know much of anything anymore." That was the honest truth. I thought I knew what I was going to do about this. I found out a week before this all happened. I was 14 days late on my cycle and I'm never late. Sway and I went to CVS and bought five tests. I had be sure. I know NaNa and Jayla are my girls but Sway was the only one I told. She had happened to call me the day I decided to buy the test and it all just came out.
Next thing I know I just start crying. It was a real ugly cry too, just so embarrassing. Sway just held me and rubbed my back. That was the most calming hug I've ever received.
"It's gonna be okay. Whatever you decided to do just know I'll never leave your side." That made me cry more. What would Dj say about us having a baby? We talked about kids before but we always placed them later on in our lives. What would my momma and my brothers say about me having a baby? Especially because my baby daddy is a criminal now! What would Ms. Deborah say? And NaNa and Jayla? I'm only 17, I'm supposed to be out having fun and worrying about college. Not worrying about if my boy friend will spend his life in jail or how I'm gonna tell him I'm pregnant with his baby.
"This is all too much to deal with, I can't be pregnant."
"Pregnant?!" NaNa says as she busts in the door.
Oh shit.