kittens ›› jhs - myn

t w e l v e

Yoongi woke up. His head pounding and chest felt like it was being ripped apart. What happened last night? The time was 3 am, his TV was on and the day was back to December 3rd. Yoongi looked down to see his old raggy clothes. Rotten food surrounding him, clothes piled in a spot.

It took him a moment to realize he was back in home. Like actually home. It was bittersweet almost. Just to make sure, he ran to his small room. It was there. Just small. Empty. Like his heart.

This just confused him even more. Why was he suddenly back in his couch? He was with Hoseok a second ago he swore and it was 8 am. It made Yoongi a little frustrated. He was already starting to miss Hoseok's presence.

Just to make sure he was actually in his own world again, he walked out and into the kitchen. The dishes were still piled up, and the uneaten food was still lying around. Everything was the same as he left it before.

It scared him. Was he dreaming this whole time? Was he going crazy? Thoughts  filled his mind as he ran around calling for Hoseok desperately. His voice began to crack as tears began forming in his eyes and dripped down his rosy cheeks.

It felt real when he touched Hoseok, when he kissed him and when he talked to him. Everything felt so real so where was Hoseok now? Why doesn't he actually exist?

Yoongi slid down a door and cluchted his arms while his head was hung low. Where was everyone when he needed someone? He could spend all day looking for Hoseok but he knew Hoseok was part of a dream that felt real.

But why did he suddenly wake up when he was gone for so long? He tried to re-trace his steps.

He was with Hoseok when Hoseok had said they should break up. He remember crying and begging not to and they could fix this. Suddenly Hoseok fell down.

It scared him that Hoseok could be on the other side of the wall but unable to hear him or that Hoseok was just lying on the floor now and probably going to die soon but in no way could he get back to Hoseok.

He wanted Hoseok back. He didn't even know the reason they were breaking up. He needed to know everything but how would he ever get back to dreamland again?

Yoongi closed his eyes and tried to fall back asleep, listening to the soft waves crashing against the shore about a few miles away from his window. That always calmed him, it should now. Right?

Yoongi wrapped himself in a ball and shut his eyes tightly once again. This has to work. He needed hope and help. His hands traveled up into his hair and turned them into fists, tugging at his hair.

Even if he were to pinch himself, he couldn't get over Hoseok. He tried so hard by slowly wrapping his arms around him tighter and shutting his eyes tighter.

"Please, just please."

I hate this chapter and its the last one. I'm so sorry it was a horrible ending.