under the blue moonlit place.

secrets unravelled.

It had been 2 months since I told Delvin about my feelings for Savannah. The nights after that I couldn't stop thinking about my sexuality, all these years I was so confused with how I looked at girls and now it all made sense. I was going through a stage of denying, accepting, denying, accepting myself. For anyone who likes the same sex, or both or all genders; you will understand this feeling. I don't know why I was scared to accept myself, everyone else probably would. Sure there would be the few homophobic people her and there, but I could just block them out of my life. I think my head was going through a stage of realisation, I cried a lot after school thinking about it. I would watch gay videos, sad ones and happy but the sad ones made me cry because I could relate to those same feelings. I know a lot of people say being pansexual/bisexual is easier because you still feel an attraction to the opposite gender still. Now, no i'm not saying it isn't easier because it may well be, there is no definite. However, it is so hard to allow yourself to understand that you love all, not one. Sometimes I go to sleep wishing to be straight or even gay, because people think you are lying about it, trying to be 'cool'; like what the fuck if they could go through this for one day...anyway I think I should stop my emotional rant, just watch buzzfeed - 'I'm bisexual but i'm not...' it explains it all. ;)

Me and Savannah had hang out so much and texted nearly everyday. She would stop and talk in school to me, which created her friends to give rolled eyes and disgusting looks behind her, which made me more shy. We had really hit it off and so much in common. Occasionally I would try to flirt but my head made me stop a lot; scared of the unknown. I would send snaps like 'sweet dreams!' then an ugly photo of me saying 'better not dream of this'. She would reply with an ugly one too even though it was still beautiful, and 'sweet dreams! Or this...'. Then I would say 'now I will have sweet dreams ;)' and she just say the same. That is my way of flirting up to its limits practically. 

Aiden and Delvin are still the cutest couple ever, they make me jealous sometimes honestly. They way they cuddle while watching a movie, and tickle each other until one falls on the floor dying with laughter. When they stare into each others eyes of love like the world has froze around them. I make them fall out of their cloud 9 with a "get a room" and they laugh and just kiss to make me turn even more. They were pretty serious, they had been dating for 4 months now and I think they could last forever like a special memory that never fades. I think this was a boy Delvin loved, not liked or fancied but truly love loved him. I couldn't be more happy.

🌸🌸🌸

Savannah asked me if I wanted to hang out in town today after school, so of course I said yes. Savannah caught me at break and asked "Hey Daisy, do you wanna go out after school. I know this adorable coffee shop which you will love!" She squeaked excitedly. I blushed by her cuteness and Delvin and Aiden giggled behind me, Noah and Summer just kept talking. 

"Uh, yes of course! What time?" I blushed.

"Um, I don't know. Do you wanna get changed first?" She asked.

"Only if you want to, I just want to spend time with you." I blushed and looked down after realising my stupidity for saying that. Savannah just giggled.

"Aww, so do I. Good, shall we go straight after school? You can meet me at my car?" She said brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. She was so gorgeous. 

"Yes that sounds great! Thanks." I piped up. 

"Ok see you then." Savannah smiled and gave me a quick hug before shooting off to her friends. My friends had already made their way over to a bench and table, I went over and joined them beaming as ever after seeing Savannah. 

"Woah, Miss Popular. Why has Savannah been drooling over you recently?" Summer questioned. I gave her a confused look and an eyebrow while blushing ever so slightly.