i'm // not // okay ☼ f.i. + g.w.

I

i watched him as he scratched the bandage on his wrist, an annoyed look over his face. he had bags under his eyes and his hair was a mess. but i couldn't take my eyes off of him.

while the other students were smiling and laughing, hope shining bright in their eyes; he was drumming his fingers on the desk along with the beat of whatever was playing in the headphones he wouldn't take off. no matter how many times the teacher asked.

he looked broken. he was broken.

much like me, his face never showed even a glimpse of wanting to live, wanting to continue in this twisted world.

and i understood him completely.

he walked slowly and talked even slower. his voice was raspy like he hadn't used it in weeks. but it was beautiful. in a broken down, beaten, but still living sort of way.

just like him.

i watched him the whole day, he never smiled or laughed. he never showed even the slightest bit of happiness and my heart ached for him. it ached because i was just like him.

we were alone in a world full of oblivious people and no matter how hard or how loud we would scream they simply could not hear our desperate pleas. if they took a moment to look around and see that people all around them were broken, and they could help, the world wouldn't be so cruel and down right unbearable.

i wanted to be the person that would walk over and tell him it would be okay, but i couldn't. i wasn't strong enough and i didn't actually know if would be and to lie to him was the worst thing i could imagine.

for i already had fallen for the broken boy in a broken world.