Clopwyck River - revised version

Chapter Sixteen

When I got home, I had the usual exchange with Andrew, and the usual non exchange with Daria as she seemed absorbed in everything and anything she was doing, as long as it didn't involve making eye contact with me.
​I'm ready for school and my stomach has reluctantly led me to the kitchen. Andrew is reading a story to Elliot, who is interrupting with observations such as 'cow' or 'horsey'. As always, Andrew is the first one to notice me hovering by the doorway, as Daria gets her lunch ready for work.
"All set for school, Demi?"
"Uh, yeah."
"Sit down and have some breakfast. There's cereal, or toast, or-"
"I'm okay, I'm meeting a friend on the way to school. I better get going or she'll wonder where I am." I grab a banana, knowing it's not enough to satisfy my grumbling stomach, but not wanting to get in Daria's way. "This'll be fine."
"Okay. See you later then." Andrew looks down at Elliot. "Say bye to Demi, buddy."
"Bye, Dem-dem." Elliot mumbles, unable to tear his eyes away from the farm animals that have him mesmerised.
Andrew smiles at me. "Have a good day."
I look at the back of Daria's head, who is attempting to press the lid on top of a lunch box. I swallow.
"Um, bye, Daria."
"Hmmm?" She whips round to look at me. "Oh. Yeah. Bye."
My insides squirm and I scurry out of the kitchen, away from Daria, and grab my bag and coat as I escape the house. I hurry down the drive, tears tiptoeing towards my eyes and am relieved to see Ruby wandering along the road. She sees me and grins as she waves as if she's two hundred meters away and I haven't spotted her. I shake my head, my tears retreat, and I meet her at the bottom of our drive.
"Hey!" She hops from one foot to the other. "It's Friday! Party time tomorrow. Leo and Demi are going to get it on!"
"My God, you're such a loser. Please stop saying that, it's making me nervous."
Ruby waggles her eyebrows at me. "That just shows how much you like him."
"I don't even know him that well. I don't know if I want anything to happen with him."
"Seriously? You don't feel like swooning whenever you think of him?" I glance at her, trying to repress a grin. "I believe that if two people witness an unexplained bizarreness together, such as a horse committing suicide let's say, then they are destined to be as one, to partake in steamy, lustful, kissing sessions."
I push her away from me, shaking my head. "Please stop, you're....GAH!"
I clutch my heart and stumble backwards from the person I've just slammed into. I catch my breath and look them up and down, wondering where they could have appeared from, and then realise it's not the first time they've scared the breath out of me.
It's the old lady from the woods. The one I met on my first night here.
"Agnes, what are you doing scaring poor Demi like that? Don't you know she needs to save her heart beats for the love of her life?"
"Shut up, Ruby." I elbow her as the old woman stares at me. "Wait, do you know her?"
Ruby steps forward and flings an arm around the woman's shoulders. "Of course; this is Agnes. We've bumped into each other a few times on my way to the mill. Haven't we, Agnes?"
Agnes looks at Ruby, a toothless smile spreading across her creased, papery skin.
"You're still here. You're always here."
"That's right, Agnes, I'm here, and you're here, and Demi is here. We're all here."
The smile disintegrates from Agnes' face and she walks away towards the woods, letting Ruby's arm fall from her shoulders. As she walks past me I can hear her muttering to herself, words that have no business being together in a sentence uttered by a lonely old woman. Words like 'wings', 'blood', and 'evil'.
I shiver as I watch her disappear into the distance, then I turn to Ruby.
"What's her story?"
"I'm not sure. I think she's homeless, and clearly crazy. I've seen her in the woods a few times, she scared the life out of me the first time I met her, but she seems harmless enough." Ruby turns to look at her just as Agnes stops to have a conversation with a pigeon. "I think she's just lonely."
"I wonder if she has any family?"
"Not sure." Ruby turns back to me. "Anyway, where were we? Oh yeah, you and Leo." I put a hand up, warning her not to start again. "Actually, I was going to ask whether you still think it's him who left you that note."
"Oh. I'm not really sure. I figure I'll see him and Ciara at school today and see what happens. I'm not sure I want to go to that party."
"What?!" She stops walking and I turn to face her. "Why not?"
"It's at a church, Ruby, an abandoned church. I'm not sure I want to be hanging around an old religious building with dozens of dead people buried under my feet. It sounds like a recipe for disaster."
Ruby smiles as she shakes her head and puts both of her hands on my shoulders.
"You're taking what I said at the mill way too literally, Demi, it's not going to be Night of the Living Dead up there. You're not going to get hit on by a zombie."
"I know that. It just seems a bit....disrespectful to be partying at a church."
"You've been spending too much time with Leo's Dad." She squeezes my shoulders as I look at my feet, embarrassed that I'm worried about ghosts that can't be real. "Honestly, I really think we should go. Few drinks, bit of flirting, it'll be fun, and you really need some fun."
I guess I can't really argue with that.
***
I've spent most of the day praying that I wouldn't get the chance to confront Ciara or Leo about the note, but of course you never get what you wish for.
I'm in the toilets, washing my hands just after lunch, when Ciara slams the door open and sashays in. Seriously, doesn't that girl get tired of walking around like she's on the catwalk all the time? She spots me, her face grimacing like she's just trodden in something, then throws her bag onto the sink.
"Can I help you with something?" She spits as she pulls out her make-up bag.
"Yes, actually, you can." I sling my bag onto the sink and rummage around in it until my fingers brush the note.
She turns to me, a hand on her hip. "I swear, for your sake, you better not be about to ask me about Ben? I know you went to see his Dad. What part of stay away from him do you not understand?"
I pull the note out, and hoping that those piercing blue eyes can't see through my bravado, I lift my chin and hold the note up.
"Funny you say that. Did you do this?"
She purses her lips, and walks towards me, snatching the paper out of my hand. She smiles as she reads it, then hands it back to me, clasping it between her fingers.
"Please, you think I wrote this? Listen, if was going to threaten you, I wouldn't be stupid enough to do it in a hand written note. That's what social media is for. Insulting fat and ugly people and making thinly veiled threats." She raises her eyebrows at me, and I take the note back from her. "Although, I can't say I disagree with the sentiment of the note."
I look down at the words on the paper, not that I need to remind myself what they say. She goes on.
"What happened to Ben is nothing to do with you, and the sooner you get that through your mousey hair, the sooner I don't have to keep on talking to you whenever I see you. I'm obviously not the only one who thinks so."
Anger suddenly rages through my veins. "Of course it's to do with me, Ciara, I was there when he jumped off the bridge; when he set fire to himself! You weren't there for him then, were you? You didn't see his face, or hear what he said."
My words have stung her, and her face softens for a moment, giving me a glimpse of what she looks like underneath all that makeup.
"He's lying in the hospital, Ciara, covered in burns. Whatever it was that he did isn't going away, and that's where it's got him. Me trying to find out what he's done isn't going to make things worse, how can it? "
She slumps against the porcelain sink, a shadow of the girl who strutted into the room moments ago.
"You don't know that. It's not going to end well for him if you carry on digging around for his secrets." She looks up at me, her false eyelashes straining under the weight of her tears. "It won't end well for you, either."
Her voice has softened, and she sounds like a different person. The words aren't threatening me. They're warning me.
I take a step closer to her, as she blinks away her tears. "What does that mean? Ciara, what are you talking about?"
She shakes her head, and looks in the mirror, wiping away any signs that she has human emotions with her little finger. She pulls out some powder and lip gloss and refreshes her makeup, then clears her throat, her ice-queen voice back in place.
"Are you stupid or something? It means what I've been saying to you all along. Stay away from Ben, and just leave it alone. This Veronica Mars thing is getting really embarrassing."
She slings her bag over her shoulder, shakes her head as she looks me up and down with a raised eyebrow, and strides out of the toilets.
I stand in the sudden isolation of the white tile and dripping taps, gripping the sink. I shake my head. No. I'm not letting that go, she was close to being human, to telling me something, I know she was.
I shove the note back in my bag and hurry out of the toilets, nowhere near as sophisticated as Ciara's exit as the closing door catches me on my heel and I trip over, me and the contents of my bag sprawling across the school corridor.
The crowd erupts and I make myself as small as possible as I grab all of the items that are rolling across the floor. My embarrassment has rendered my fingers and thumbs practically useless, as a tampon keeps escaping from my fingertips.
"Enjoy your trip?"
I grimace as I hear the words, from the one person in the world I wouldn't want helping me up after an extremely unglamorous fall. I look up and wish that the spot where I'm slumped on the floor would actually crack open and swallow me whole, then spit me out, a million miles from here.
Leo crouches down to my level and holds out a hand. His eyes give away the smile that he's trying to bite down.
I glare at his hand. "I can't believe you said that."
His smile breaks free and slides up towards his cheek, revealing a perfect dimple. God I hate him right now.
"Not very original, I know, but I had to say something." He nods towards his hand, and I grab it, resentful of the warm sparks it sends shooting up my wrist.
Ruby is right. I am so into this boy.
He pulls me to my feet and I brush the corridor grime from my knees. He picks up my bag and tries to hook it on my arm, but I snatch is from his hands, frowning at him as I put it over my shoulder.
Another dimple appears in his other cheek, and he puts his hands in his pockets.
"Seriously, that was pretty dramatic. You okay?" He asks.
"I'm fine." I growl.
"You were in a hurry to get out of there." He gestures to the door of toilets, and leans into me. "Did you make a bad smell?"
"What?! No!" He's playing with me, and I can't get control of the game. "I just, I was just in a hurry, and the door tripped me, and then-"
"And then you fell at my feet?"
"No, I just...I....shut up." I whirl around, desperate to get away from the waves embarrassment that keeps crashing over me.
He grabs my shoulder with a strong hand, and tries to turn me around, but I shove it off and keep walking. Laughing, he strides in front of me, walking backwards until I stop and fold my arms. He puts his hands up in surrender.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I can't help it. There's just something about you that makes me want to give you a hard time." He bites his bottom lip and takes a step closer, clouding me in his intoxicating boy smell. "Like when you're little and you chase the girl you like."
I stare up at him, swallowing a few times as he smiles down at me. I wish I had the strength for a witty retort but being this close to Leo seems to have switched the witty vocab part of my brain off.
I find my voice, and roll my eyes. "Whatever."
"Where are you going? I'll walk with you in case you fall over again."
Could he be any more annoying? "I'm walking to my locker."
"Lead the way."
I have to think for a moment which direction my locker is actually in, then start walking. I wonder if this is a good time to ask him about the note, but all of this is making me doubt whether he would be capable of something like that.
"How've you been?" He asks and I glance at him, flushing when I realise he's looking right at me. "I mean, since the other night. With the horse."
"Fine." Apart from the threatening note, and the bee. "How about you?"
"Honestly? A bit shaken. It really freaked me out. I ran all the way home after I left you."
The image of Leo running scared makes me relax a little, and I smile at him.
"Really?"
"Yes, really! I still can't believe what happened. It was so weird. I'm glad I wasn't alone." He leans into my ear and whispers, "I think I might have wet myself."
I smile and shove him away before he notices the goose bumps from his breath on my skin.
"What do you think it was?" I ask him.
He rubs the back of his head, shrugging his shoulders. "I Googled it and found a bit on animal suicide. Apparently dogs or whatever have killed themselves after their owner has died. Apparently there's a parasite that can make them act like that as well, so maybe that was it?"
"Maybe." I walk along next to him, remembering my hand in his as we watched the horse charge into the tree. The memory ignites a shiver down my back.
"Yeah, maybe. It just seemed so....determined. I didn't know that horses could get attached to their owners like that so it seems unlikely. I don't understand how a parasite could affect an animal's behaviour, either. But what do I know about it."
I stop in the hallway, frowning after a girl shoves past me. Leo puts a hand on my arm, his eyebrows drawn together in concern.
"You okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine."
"Why have you stopped?"
I point over my shoulder. "This is my locker."
His face relaxes and he nods. "Oh, yeah. Right. Here we are."
I turn to my locker and scramble in my bag for the tiny key. I glance at Leo as I'm searching.
"How's Ben doing?"
Leo's eyes lose some of their sparkle as he looks down at his feet.
"He's okay, thanks. I mean, he's still the same, but he's comfortable apparently."
"That's something I suppose. Do they have any idea when he might wake up?"
He shakes his head. "No, they can't tell us anything, they just keep saying to think positively, to keep praying for him."
"Yeah, that's what your Dad said."
I find the key and look up from my bag, to find Leo staring down at me, his jaw clenched and his eyebrows drawing down above his eyes. He looks like a different person.
"You've been talking to my Dad?"
I nod, then turn the key and open my locker door, grabbing a couple of books and shoving them in my bag. "I went to see him at his church the other day."
"Why'd you do that?"
"I wanted to talk to him about Ben."
Leo runs a hand through his hair, grasping it at the crown before he drops his hand back to his side.
"Jesus, Demi, why are you asking my Dad questions about Ben?"
I frown at Leo. "Why do you think? Because we nearly drowned together, that's why. Because of what he said to me before he jumped. Because he needed help."
"It's not your call to decide whether he needs help, Demi, it's nothing to do with you. You need to stop this."
"Do you know what?" I shove my bag into my locker and turn to face Leo, my hands on my hips. "I'm getting pretty fed up with people telling me what I can and can't do."
"I'm not telling you what to do, I'm just-"
"That's exactly what you're doing. I know he's your brother, Leo, and I know you're worried about him, but you weren't on that bridge with us. I can't stop thinking about what he said, his face, his desperation as he lit that lighter." I pause, and shake my head as Leo glares at me. "I'm sorry but I need to know why he was up there. I need to help him."
The bell rings and I grab my bag from inside my locker, pulling it out and putting it under my arm.
"That's what family is for, Demi, his family. It's got nothing to-" He frowns at the floor and I follow his eyes as he bends down to retrieve a piece of paper from between my feet. "You dropped this."
I stare at the paper and look up at him. "That's not mine."
"It just fell out of your locker."
Saliva dries up in my mouth as I take the paper from Leo, and unfold it, already knowing what it is. I read the words, the familiar capital letters spiked across the page.
STOP ASKING QUESTIONS. BEN HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU. YOU'RE GOING TO GET YOURSELF HURT.
The words stoke a rage inside my chest, and my face goes so red I feel like my cheeks have ignited. I hold the note up, right in front of Leo's face, jabbing at it with a shaking finger until he takes it from me.
"Is this you!? Is it, Leo!? Are you the one who's threatening me?!"
"Wha-what?" He frowns at the note, the words taking a few seconds to sink in. "Demi, you don't think I would write something like this, do you?"
"Why not?!" People are craning their necks to hear what we're arguing about, but I am so beyond caring. "You keep warning me to stay away from Ben!"
"No, I...I just mean....I would never hurt you, Demi. I can't believe you would think that."
I snatch the note from his hand, and slam my locker door, fumbling with it with shaking hands as it bounces back open again. Leo reaches a hand out.
"Here, let me help-"
"I don't need your help. Just get away from me."
"Demi, I..."
Leo's face is a picture of confusion and concern, but the note has made me so angry there isn't a shred left inside of me for anything other than outrage. I manage to close my locker, and storm away from him, closing my eyes against the tears that threaten to make an appearance, and the sound of Leo's voice echoing my name down the corridor.