Blind Date

The Stars

"Something is going on in your head. I may not be able to see your face, but I can basically hear every wheel turning in your head!"
"I've just been thinking."
"Matthew, you know that's dangerous." Her face shows a smile, and usually I would smile too...

••|••

It had been a week since dinner and Matthew had been avoiding me, or so it seemed.
"I have to go.. Crammed today." His voice was edged with thoughts.
"Alright." I sigh, "I love you."
"I love you too." And he hung up.
I know I said I would, could, wait until he told me.. But man this is going on for too long.
Tonight. I'm going to ask him tonight.

Well.. Now I got nervous.
What if he's hiding whatever he's hiding because he knows I won't like it? Or what if he's not in love with me..
No. I'm not going to do this to myself. Matthew is not William. Not even close. The two names are even completely different.
I spit fire in my brain for several hours.. Giving myself a headache.
I start to make dinner, since we made plans tonight, and I start to anticipate hearing him walk through the door.
I was making Spaghetti, and the toast was almost done as he made his appearance.
"Hey."
"Hey!" I embrace him and his smell lingers in my nose. "How was your day?"
"Exhausting." He sighs. The timer goes off and I speedily make my way over to the oven. I grab the mit, but it didn't form firmly on my hand, because it fell off as soon as my hand hit the pan. I jump back, a harsh hiss coming from my clenched teeth.
"Grace?" Almost as if a millisecond passed and Matt ends up right beside me. His arms outline mine and he quickly set out the pan correctly and turns off the oven. He directs me to the couch and he coats my hand with ointment and bandaging.
"It slipped." I sigh.
"It's okay. You didn't see it.." He goes silent and he stops wrapping for a second, before taking off again.
"What's wrong with you? Something is going on in your head. I may not be able to see your face, but I can basically hear every wheel turning in your head!"
"I've just been thinking."
"Matthew, you know that's dangerous." I smile, trying to take my mind off my burning hand. No laughter. Not one chuckle from his lips.. That's how I know he's serious. "Come on, open up to me."
"I-"
"My hand is burning, just talk about something else."
"What's the thing you would like to see most?"
I used to always think of my answer if I was asked this, but recently, I never think about it.
"You and Kyle." I sigh.
"I mean, other than people."
"I guess, off the top of my head.." I pause, "The stars."
"Really?"
"Yeah, I've always wanted to see them."
"How badly?"
"How badly what?"
"How badly would you want to see them."
"I can't. So I don't want to talk about it." I snapped a little, but this topic is kind of hard for me.
"What if you could?"
"I can't. I just- I just can't Matt." I feel my eyes start to water, which makes me hate them even more.
"Grace." He takes ahold of my hand. "What if I could help you get there?"
"Help me get there.. How?"
"I've been saving money.." He pauses, "So I can afford the surgery.. For your eyes."
Speachless..
"Money is better spent elsewhere." I try to dodge. "You can spend it on your clinic, or on a house. Something other than me and surgery."
"But Grace-"
"I've researched it." My voice gives out, and I pull my hand out of his,  "Doctors have told me, there's a lot of pain. And I don't have much of a pain tolerance.."
"You just burned your hand and now you're having a regular conversation with me." He sighs, "Just think about it at least. I don't care to spend the money on you. I'd probably still spend the cash on you!" He takes my hand once more and grips it to the point I can't pull away, even if I wanted to. "I want to do everything possible for you, if you would just let me."

After that, Matthew was a little more open than before, but now I was the one who was shut down. I was confused in what I wanted. I contemplated this for months when it was an option for me the first time.. But now.. It would actually be carried through. I know it would be because Matthew would see to it that it would be. I've always wanted to see, I always will, but I've always been scared of actually seeing. I've created my own little view of things in my head, things would get super difficult. I'd have to learn how to read, how to write...
Meet my two best friends like the way they actually look..

"Yes."
"Yes what?"
It had been about two week since he asked and we were sitting on the couch.
"Yes to the surgery."

Maybe I'll regret this.. But who knows.
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Thank you for reading!

Haha hehe.

- Emuna_Jasmine