Forever is a long time ≫ Deidara

Akatsuki

[edited]
Hello, this is edited. I am ashamed to say that I had edited this after a I published this and didn't notice how cringy it was. I am ashamed to say that I'm proud of this. Anyways, it's edited but there still might be mistake. I also added some things that weren't there before to make this more amusing but it's probably even worse than it was before.

-Author

————

I walked through the woods aimlessly. I had absoloutly no plans. Where should I go? What should I do? I have no family and no friends. I am a lonely potato. With that in mind I decided to just go with the flow. After a few minutes of thinking about life and how the moo goes cow, I hopped up on a branch and soared from tree to tree.

"OH MAN HOLY SHIT!" I yelled as something, or someone, grabbed my leg and yanked me back down to the branch I had just left.

Looking down I saw a black arm protruding from the tree branch and then slowly a head appeared, followed by a torso. I recognized the cloak the... thing was wearing. He was from the Akatsuki. I don't know who — or what — he is all I know is that he looked the opposite of friendly. So, I did what anyone would do. I kicked him in the face and ran. He looked at me bewildered as I ran off.

"The frick frack paddy whack was that?!" I gasped, stopping at a tree to catch my breath. Why did he look so shocked. Did he expect me to laughs and hold his hand? Did he want to cloud gaze and discuss the weather? N to the o, bro.

"Hey there, beautiful~" A deep, husky voice whispered. I turned around with lightning speed to see a man with slicked back silver hair and magenta eyes leaning against the tree across from me. He had a playboy smirk and was also wearing an Akatsuki cloak. Lucky me.

"WHAT THE HELL?! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?!" I screeched.

"HELL!" He yelled back and lunges forward, tackling me. We fell down to the forest floor. I flipped us around so he took the impact. He grunted with pain and a supicmening crack filled the air, making me cringe.

What does the Akatsuki want with me?! I thought I'm a lonely little potato who wants to go nap and be a free birdie.

I punched the mysterious man in the face and crawled away from him as fast as I could, grabbing plants and such along the way, but unfortunately, he grabbed my foot and dragged me back towards him, chuckling evily. He pinned my arms behind me and sat on my legs.

"I GOT HER!" He roared. I groaned internally and then spat out dirt that had ended up in my mouth during my escape and capture. Many thoughts clouded my mind. I sighed exasperatedly. Whoopee! Isn't this my lucky day!

"Do you want a gold star?" Growled a different man from the tree above us. I jumped a little, or shuddered. I can't exactly jump in the position I'm in. He wore a mask that covered most of his face and head and an Akatsuki coat. Why are there so many of them? I'm not even that strong! The one good thing I can do is run and eat at speeds no human can rival. I sighed, I had to get away. I spat in the silver haired mans face and he let go of my wrists to wipe the spit from his eyes.

"Bitch!" He growled. I cackled like psycho. Better a bitch then an idiot. No, that's a lie. I'd rather be an idiot.

I pushed him off, seeing the scythe that laid beside him I grabbed it and just as he stood up and looked at me I swung the scythe at his head I watched his now headless body topple to the ground, his head rolling towards a river. I spun and ran in the opposite direction.

Are they gone? I thought Please, tell me they're gone.

It had been one hour since I had seen the Akatsuki and I felt uneasy. There's no way I lost them that easily. I mean the plant man and the masked man were still out there and who knows maybe there was more of them, plus I am not strong. Now that I think about it I just probably hide my chakra... something whizzed by my ear.

"DAMMIT!" I yelled and took off running. I don't know what flew past my ear but it's probably dangerous and could kill me so fack it Ima dashi run run run away.

Out of the corner of me eye I could see something white fluttering around above me. I yelped as it exploded, causing me to stumbled forwards a bit. What is it? And then more white blobs began exploding around me. Which one is after me? I risked a glance behind me and saw a a giant hunched figure a few feet behind with a white scorpion tail protruding from its back. Well, that's not good. I looked up to see a giant white bird of some kind right above me.

"Camouflage Jutsu!" I muttered.

I blended in with the area around me. Slowly but surely I snuck away and kept a close eye on the two Akatsuki tracking me. The hunched over one seemed to know exactly where I was though because his scorpion tail shot towards me. I lost focus while doging and my camouflage disappeared leaving me visible once again. The white bird landed a few feet away from me revealing a beautiful young woman with long blond hair that was put up into a half ponytail. She grinned as she threw a white bird at me.

It exploded in my face leaving me with frizzy hair and black scorch marks. I spun around and almost ran right into the scorpion man who had somehow snuck up behind me. Actually, that's kinda creepy. I'm not the best ninja but I should be able to detect things like this, like jebus!

"Deidara, let's hurry up and make this quick!" Growled the ugly thingy as I crept away from him. At least now I know the blonde lady's name, Deidara. Although, that's a masculine name I'm not gonna judge.

"Don't worry Sasori, my man!" Drawled Deidara breaking me out of my daze. So the scorpion guy was named Sasori. Was he Sasori as in Sasori of the Red Sand? The famous puppet guy? Nah, that guy was fine looking, this guys reminds me of things I don't want to be reminded of.

I looked around desperately until out of the corner of my eye I saw a cliff and heard a waterfall. I grinned and ducked just as one of Deidaras exploding birds came at me from behind so instead it exploded in Sasori's face.

"GOD DAMMIT, DEIDARA!" Sasori yelled angrily. I chuckled like a maniac. I couldn't see much due to the smoke but that could serve as a good distraction.

"SASORI DANNA! I AM SO SORRY, UN!" Yelped Deidara. This woman has such as deep voice, it's kind of freaking me out. I mean, you be you, dude.

I took this little distraction that I had so cleverly caused and ran full speed towards the cliff. I had one objective in mind: jump. I was just praying that there was water and that the impact wouldn't kill me. That would suck, like I just escaped. I don't want to be sent back to hell, either of them would suck.

"STOP HER!" Shouted a familiar voice, wrenching me from my thoughts. I recognized it as the silver haired mans deep, kinda seductive voice but that was impossible. I chopped his head off like I chopped a chicken's. It was like going through butter and was very satisfying, not that I would do it again to anyone else!

I abolished any more thoughts of decapitation as I neared the cliffs edge. With a large, manic grin I took a leap of faith, literally. The only thing I was relying on was faith.