Heart's Desire | #WATTYS2017

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August 10,2014
Tavena
"Having the right people around you all the time is important."

I woke up to see my grandmother standing over me.

"Grandma?" I asked. "Is it really you?"

"Yes, it's really me. I've missed you guys so much." She said.

"I've missed you so much grandma," I hugged her.

"I told you I wasn't going anywhere," She smiled. "I'm always going to be here."

"I can't believe your here."

"How are you holding up?"

"I could be doing better, you know-"

I woke up to the sound of my alarm.

"Shit," I said to myself. "Why did that dream feel so real."

I reached over and grabbed my phone from my nightstand to see a reminder that it was my grandmother's birthday today.

I never thought I would ever be without her on her birthday.

Every year for her own birthday she chose to be with me and Mani.

I don't know how I'm going to get through this day, especially when I'm not going to be able to see Mani for awhile.

I still can't believe my grandmother is gone. It just doesn't feel real to me, I never imagined my life without her. She always made me feel better about the whole situation with Gina. She was basically the only person I looked up too and trusted...the only person that actually cared about me and now I just don't know anymore.

I lazily dragged myself out of bed to began preparing myself for today.

I carried myself across the dimly lit hall towards the bathroom. And flicked on the light switch,  I untangled my hair with my fingers before throwing it into a high bun. As I stood in front of the mirror staring back at my own reflection.

"Today is going to be quite a day," I mumbled to myself.

I grabbed my toothbrush and began to brush my teeth.

I made my way downstairs and sat on the couch.

I don't feel like doing anything today...

I turn on the TV to see that they were showing old episodes of 'That's So Raven'

I sat back and watched TV.

  ••• 
I didn't even know I dozed off.

I grabbed my phone from the side of me, to read a text message from August:

August: "I was just making sure you didn't forget bout our date tonight."

I honestly forgot all about that date with August...I feel so bad now.

Tavena: "I'm really sorry...but I totally forgot about our date."

Three minutes later.

August: "It's coo. Do you still want ta go on da date?"

Tavena: "Can we maybe reschedule it for another time. I just have so much on my mind right now."