My Reason to Live. - One Direction Fanfic.

"Why is it so hard to say goodbye?"

{Callie’s P.O.V}

I wake up to the sound of a soft, steady heartbeat and become aware that I am pressed against something soft, and warm. I open my eyes, just a crack, to realise that the soft, warm thing I am pressed against is Louis’ chest. He is still slumped against my bedroom door with me in his arms.

I don’t move, not wanting to wake him, so just lie here for a while, daydreaming.

“I’m sorry, they, they didn’t make it” the nurse says quietly, timidly, almost as if she’s trying not to anger a lion.

The emotions swirl around my head in a whirlwind, anger, hurt, sadness, worry, confusion. They can’t be dead they can’t. But they are. My parents are dead. Why? Why me? Why them? Why can’t they be snuggled up in bed sleeping, or watching a movie. Why can’t they be okay? They are the nicest, kindest, most understanding people I’ve ever known, why them?

 

The memory takes over my thoughts without my permission. I’ve tried for so long to block it out, but it keeps coming back, keeps making its way into my head. I wanted to die that day, I wanted to die and be with my parents, but the only thing stopping me was the letter I  was given by the nurse, my mum had written it to me when she knew she was going to die, the nurse said she wouldn’t take no for an answer, demanding a pen and paper. Sounds like my mum, never the sheep, never followed the ground or bowed down to others. Never. I still have that letter in my room, I read over it whenever I feel down, I’ve read it so much I know it off by heart.

“Dear my beautiful daughter Callie,

                                                               I know this is going to be difficult. I know this is going to be tough, but I want you to know that we’ll always be here, in your heart. You’re a wonderful, amazing, beautiful young woman Callie, you’re going to be so successful and happy, just please, promise me one thing. Don’t do anything stupid, it’s going to be hard not having us at hand, but you’ll get used to it I guess. And besides, we’ll always be there in your heart if you need help with anything. Baby girl, always remember us for the happy, smiley people we were, not these people in hospital beds, please?

 

I had to fight a lot to be able to write this letter, and as you can imagine, stubborn old me wouldn’t let them say no. I ordered them to give me what I wanted, and like I always tell you, you don’t get unless you ask.

 

Whoever your new parents are, I’m sure they’ll be just as good to you as we were; I promise you it’ll be okay. Of course you’ll miss us, but think of it this way; you have two more angels up in heaven looking down on you now. We’ll always love you, no matter what.

 

Please, move on with your life, you’re beautiful. One day, you’re going to meet a handsome boy, who’ll love you so much. You’ll have children, and please tell them about your father and I.

 

I have so much more to say, but the nurses are shouting at me to lie down.

I'm sorry baby girl, I have to go.

 

Me and your father love you with all our hearts,

                                                                                   All our love, Mum and Dad .x”