More Than A Skirt

24

A/N: long and shitty but eh

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As Josh parks the car, I begin to contemplate how this could go. His friends could like me and accept Josh and I's relationship... that thought in itself brought up, even more, concerns for me. On the other hand, his friends could hate me and disapprove of... whatever it was we had. It's happened before. It's why Ethan and Harry, and by extension Tobi are my only friends. A hand on my shoulder breaks up my thoughts.

"Baby girl? Are you okay? If you don't want to meet them today, that's okay."

"No no. It's okay. I was just... thinking."

"About what?"

God bless and curse this man for his caring and inquisitive nature.

"About how your friends will react. About my past... About... us...

"Baby girl, talk to me okay? I want you to be okay. I want us to be okay. Only talk about what you're comfortable with. I will wait forever for you baby. I don't want to push you too far."

Tears trail down my face and Josh leans over to wipe them away. He presses little kisses to my face whispering to me sweet things, in an attempt to calm me down. I get my breathing under control and make a decision.

"I've had somewhat of a boyfriend before. Not much of one. Only lasted a month, but that month was a living hell. I was sixteen and had just started discovering that I like skirt and garters and all those things. I started a Tumblr page, a different on than the one I have now. A boy from my old school found out, but instead of bullying me, he complimented me. Gave me little gifts and I fell hard. We kept it a secret which was fine with me. We were young and our school was very hostile. I had a few friends, but he was somewhat popular. His friends got suspicious a week after he asked me out. He decided to tell them, without asking me, though he told me that night. The next day was the beginning of my month of hell. I always kinda stayed away from people as I'm not big on social interaction, but it was different. You could see the people shunning and avoiding me. The pokes, pinches, and notes slowly started. Towards the end was when the verbal and physical abuse. That's about when my parents found out and started making preparations to move me to another school. On my last day, I found him and screamed at him. Asking why he had dated me if he was going to basically throw me aside. He had just laughed in my face and said he never really cared about me, then punched me and threw me to the ground. I had a bit of a break before I started at my new school, so I decided to embrace my feminine side fully. I had my mom take me to the store and we went crazy with getting me a new wardrobe. I started school fully decked out in a skirt, stockings, and crop top. Harry clocked me immediately and befriended me. From him, I met Ethan. Tobi showed up a few weeks later as Harry's boyfriend who had graduated a few years earlier. Which takes us to today. I'm scared. I know you aren't... him, but I'm still scared. I don't know what we are or if we'll continue and it just scares me."

I fold in on myself then, silently crying. I feel arms wrap around me and pull me into Josh's lap. He rocks as best as he can while in a car.

"Vik, I really really like you and that scares me a lot too. I've never fallen for a boy. This is all new for me. I want us to continue okay? As fast or as slow as we agree upon. I want you comfortable and content. I really want to punch that guy in the face, but I won't cause he was in the past and ain't no one gonna touch my baby girl. It's okay to be scared."