Heart Eyes.

To the girl who can't let go

Written on behalf on 2nd person point of view.

I know how much you love him. I know how much you would like to just cuddle up to him and feel what you've been dying too for so long. I know that he makes you smile, that he makes you laugh at every joke he spits out. I know you guys talk on occasion about all sorts of things. I know that you have liked him for some time, and I know you've fallen before, this is not your first time falling for the same guy. I know you have had all nighters wondering if he's thinking about you, so much that it brings you to tears. I know his eyes light a fire inside you when he looks at you. Trust me.. I know it all too well. I know that you've been this way for months... maybe longer, and you don't want to let go because you are holding on to every last hope that he might one day love you like he loves her. He may like you, I know you love him.. but he does not love you. At least not the way you want him too and I am truly sorry.

I didn't want to let go, I didn't mean for it to happen. But when it did, my world came crashing down. The feelings grew closer and closer; stronger each time. I didn't want to fall in love with him,  but I did. I did very hard, and it was not a pretty picture. I spent my nights awake thinking to myself, why me. Creating scenarios in my head that are not and never will be true. I lost friends because I would push them away in a glance if they would rub me off about it. I didn't want anyone to know how truly hurt I was. I wasn't ready for such a heart break after my first one. This had hit me. I knew he liked me, at least a little. But he would never love me like he loved her. He was loyal, and caring, most gentle guy I know. His eyes sparked a fire in my soul and it lit for months and months. He looked at me like differently because he didn't want to hurt me. His talk was sweet. I will always remember to cherish our talks. You don't know what you lose until its gone. But it's time to let go. 

For you, my dear not-love: I'm sorry for all the pain. I'm sorry for never noticing you wanted to just lay low in our friendship and not high. I'm sorry for being hesitant, stubborn and clingy. For messaging you for everything I had a problem with. But, you assured me you were always there for me. Thank you. God, Thank you for always being there for me. I love you for that. Thank you for always being my personal work best friend. For being my helper, my mate. I didn't mean for this to happen, for liking you, for making this whole thing awkward for you when it should just be a friendship nothing more. I am truly sorry. If I could have avoided feelings early on, I would have guarded it for the both of us. Knowing that it is 9 months later... and feelings they just keep coming... I wish I had known how to save ourselves. But the heart wants more than we can handle sometimes and it is the worst. Nothing in this world could compare. 

I hope one day you can let the pieces go, and move on. I hope it isn't too much longer. Because the feeling of a broken heart is not fun. 

Letter written for anyone reading this, me, and the person dedicated too from myself (Anonymous.)