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Warning: Bulimia and kind of mature-ish scenes(neck-kissing) in this chapter. If you are uncomfortable, please skip the scenes or just go straight to the next chapter.)
Joshua POV I run from the dance studio as quickly as I can all the way to the bathroom. Breathing heavily, I locked myself in the very last stall. What the heck did I just do? Putting my hands up to my cheeks, they were boiling hot and my face was so red it would make tomatoes look pale. I shouldn't have done that, even if it was just on his cheek, I could feel his breath on the side of my face. Dammit, he's going to hate me now, we don't even know each other, he doesn't even know I like guys! I'm so stupid! My first kiss shouldn't be used up because of a dare, I should kiss him because I absolutely adore him. But then again, there will always be that chance he doesn't like me back. I can tell he's the type of guy who gets girls easily, I mean like seriously, in the hallways, girls are basically rolling over him, pushing each other down the stairs just to get to say hello to him or catch a glimpse of him. Of course, none of that ever happens to me, I'm ugly. He will never like me back. I'm just a lump of imperfection.
Hugging my knees to my chest, tears poured down my face upon the realisation that Hansol should be disgusted by me, he's going to hate me forever.
"I'm such a screw-up." I sob, "I'm such a screw-up"
I couldn't be bothered going to the cafeteria to eat, I need to lose weight anyway. Nobody likes fat, ugly people. I need to change. I need to change for Hansol. I looked at my swollen, red eyes in the mirror before breaking down again. I need to get thinner. Kneeling in front of the toilet, I shoved my fingers to the back of my throat, trying to trigger a gag reflex. I got it pretty quickly, it's not like this isn't the first time I've done this. I let out whatever was still in my stomach into the toilet bowl. I didn't even hear the bathroom door open.
"Hey, are you alright?" The voice asks. His voice sounds quite deep and soothing. And sort of accented. Sounds like he's from Daegu? "Y-yeah," I sniff,"I'm fine" "Oh come on stop lying," The other guy says. "I can tell you're not. Do you want to talk about it?" "No, you'll be disgusted if I tell you," I whisper, scared to tell a stranger about my sexuality. Lots of people are homophobic, or just hate people who aren't heterosexual. I didn't want to make things worse than they already were. "It's ok, I'm a cool guy." He says calmly," You can trust me. I won't tell anyone." I hesitated. "What's your name?" I asked. "I'm Choi Seungcheol" At least I know his name now. "I, um, just happen to like this guy in my class, but I'm scared he hates me now because just earlier I kissed him on the cheek." It all just came tumbling out of my mouth, I couldn't hold it back no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop until I ran out of breath. "Right." He said. "Would you mind telling me who he is I think I might know him." Hesitating at first, I decided to tell. "His name is Hansol Chwe," I whisper. "If you know him please don't tell him about anything I just told you. Please, I'm begging you, please don't." Seungcheol sighed. "I do happen to know him, he's my roommate along with 2 other guys. I promise I won't tell him a thing, do you want to exchange numbers so that I can tell you if I find out if he likes you? You can talk to me whenever you like." I smiled as he passes me a piece of paper under the stall. "Thank you." "Anytime friend." I could hear the smile in his voice. I unlocked the stall, walking out I wrapped my arms around his muscular form. "Thank you." He patted my head, "Shh, don't cry, Hansol doesn't like seeing people cry." He says "And please don't resort to bulimia again it's bad for your health trust me you're thin enough." I calm down eventually, he helps me freshen up so that by the end of lunch, it didn't even look like I had even shed a tear. I feel happy, I think I can trust this guy.
I felt nervous as I trudge my way to singing. All my classes are with the same people. All my classes will be with Hansol. This is going to be so awkward.
Hansol's POV Why am I still thinking about it? I'm a guy I should be thinking about other things. I bet he was just dared to do it anyways, I'm not sure if anyone would want to kiss my face, especially since I didn't wash my face this morning. I didn't see him at lunch anywhere today. Speak of the devil, I see him heading towards the classroom right now. 17 minutes till class, time to feed him a bit of his own medicine. Muahaha that'll teach him not to do that again ESPECIALLY IN A PLACE WHERE LOTS OF PEOPLE COULD SEE AND START RUMOURS.
His face flushes pink as I approach him, he obviously still hasn't forgotten. I walk closer, and just like this morning, he backs up until he hit the wall behind him, only this time, we were outside in a more secluded and darkened area. His eyes widen as his back hit the wall. I smirk sexily at him, staring into his wide, innocent eyes. I grab his hands and hold them above his head. My free hand held his face in place, slightly squishing his marshmallow cheeks. "You thought you could just get away with that didn't you?" I growl, making sure to make my voice low and husky. He swallows loudly, unable to answer. I know I have the upper hand now. Being so close I could smell his sweet chocolatey scent again. I put face near his neck, he flinches. I breathe on it slightly before kissing his neck and I continue to kiss him there, eventually, I started biting and licking. I feel him trembling under me, his breath hitches and he let out small moans and whimpers every now and then. Suddenly his knees gave way and I had to keep a hand on his hip to make sure he didn't fall. "H-Hansol, si-nnging cl-ah! Class, should be starti-starting s-soon" Joshua stutters, "We're going t-to be late if.. if you don't stop!" I pulled away, disappointed, as I looked down I caught a glimpse of a tent in his jeans. I release his hands and step back. "Fine" I humph. "I find it so funny and cute, how weak I can make you become." I smirked, "And sexually aroused." Joshua looks away, the blush (and the hickey) showing even in the shadowed area we were in. "See you in class, catboy" I cast a glance at him as I walk off, leaving him stunned, holding his bright red face.
Noooooo, singinggg claaaaasssssss..... All singing teachers I ever had were never patient enough to deal with me, mainly since I simply couldn't sing 'well enough'. I think Joshua would be good though, I could feel all his vocal cords in his neck and he could probably reach notes I could only dream of. WTF what. I need to get my feelings sorted. Do I actually like him in any way? I don't know but I did actually bother to go up to him and give him a hickey because he kissed me on the cheek. But if he kissed my cheek does that mean he likes me? But what if he was dared to do it, then he would not even mean it at all and he wouldn't like me. BUT he got an erection just because I gave him a hickey so that probably means he liked it/me, if he didn't like me he would've yelled for help or tried to push me away or something. Wait so he likes me? And I like him? Woah I had never been like this my entire life. I mean, I had a girlfriend at some point but it just didn't work out well. I still loved her for the time being though. But how on Earth did I become gay? Or bi? Or was I always just pansexual from the start?
I snap out of my thoughts as a little kitten shyly makes his way into the room. His erection was gone, I guess it either went away on its own or he jacked it off in the bathroom or something. Nah he would never do those things. He tries to find a seat on the desk/bench furthest away from me but no matter how cliche this sounded there was no other one other than the one next to me. His pretty pale face was now constantly blushing.
Mr Lee Jihoon finally came into the room when class started, he's like Mr Kwon/Soonyoung, he excelled in singing to the point they let him be a teacher during some of his class time. He took the role and we basically did nothing but theory bookwork the entire lesson. Joshua finished fairly quickly, Mr Lee was impressed with our class, he said we were better than the others. Well maybe because everyone else didn't bother to even do their homework or something.
Idiots.
------ Sorry guys but I think I might become consistent with having some mature themes going on in this book sorry I just ship them too much. Other than that I'll try to improve my other chapters but for now I need to sleep it past midnight here.
