Reagan's Readings

Chapter Fifteen

"Reagan," a husky voice whispered, jarring me from my sleep.

"Hmm?"

"Reagan."

This time, a small shake accompanied the whisper. I shrugged the hand off and turned away from the voice, trying to grab on to my thread of unconsciousness.

The bed shifted and Yoshi groaned as he stood up. I vaguely heard my door creak open and sighed in contentment at the thought of falling back to sleep. And then I felt my bed rock.

"Rae!" Venice's high voice rang directly in my ear. "We're hungry!"

"Yeah, Rae," Legend said, a bit more quietly than our little brother. "Will you make us food."

I groaned, sleep completely lost to me at this point.

"Didn't I teach you two to knock?" I asked grumpily, turning over to push them off of me.

"We did knock," Venice said matter of factly.

"And Yoshi opened the door for us," Legend continued. He pause and tilted his head at Yoshi, who was half asleep against the door.

"Why are you still here, anyways?"

Yoshi's eyebrows shot up as he looked at me for guidance, but I had no clue what to tell him. I didn't talk about things like this with myself, let alone with the boys. Hell, I didn't even know what this is. Why did I ask him to stay with me?

It was a moment of weakness. 

Yoshi cleared his throat and gestured at the boys in a come here motion. "I just wanted to make sure your sister was okay after yesterday. Come on, I'll start breakfast. Let's give Rae some time to wake up."

The boys immediately complied. They honestly listened to Yoshi more than they did me, and I wasn't sure how comfortable I was with that, but I was too tired to really care. 

I got up as well to make my way to the restroom, but in my escape through the door, I was blocked by Yoshi's arm. 

"Moment of weakness, huh?" he said, humor clearly in his voice. I blushed hard.

Fuck.

I'd been too occupied with going back to sleep to focus on blocking him from my head.

"So, if you aren't sure what "this" is, maybe we should talk about it. We can give it a name, some rules and regulations too if you want."

I stayed silent. This was too on the spot for me, and I was more than a little embarrassed that he had heard all of that. 

Fingers grazed the outline of my jaw and I lifted my eyes to Yoshi slightly. He gave me a small, good-natured smiled and leaned in slowly. My head was still too conflicted and I didn't react, except for closing my eyes.

His lips touched my nose. 

He pulled back and my eyes opened again, watching his own dark ones watching me. 

"Or maybe you still aren't ready for that," he said softly, his eyes shining bright with understanding. "I'm going to get breakfast started with the boys. Take your time waking up, sleeping beauty."

That last sentence made me giggle and he smiled widely at the sound before he disappeared towards the kitchen. 

I watched him go and ran my fingers through my hair. This man was doing a serious number on my emotions. It had been a long time since I felt like I needed somebody apart from my two brothers, and I was beginning to think I forgot how to let someone in. 

After taking a quick shower and brushing my teeth, I made my way to the kitchen, brushing out my wet hair with a comb. Upon entering, the first thing I saw was a very serious Venice with pancake mix smeared across his cheek and his tongue stuck out between his teeth, trying (and failing) at not making a mess of topping the plates of pancakes with whipped cream. I snorted loudly at the sight, but he ignored me and diligently finished plating his masterpieces. Legend was filling glasses with orange juice for him and Ven, while Yoshi was leaning against the counter, watching them both with a highly amused smile on his face and a cup of coffee in his hand. 

"You guys did a great job with breakfast," I said walking over to Venice, swiping at the mess on his face. It was dried like glue to his cheek. Great.

"Thanks you very much, Rae," Venice replied brightly, smiling at me with all of his teeth. 

"Thank you very much," I automatically corrected him.

"You're welcome," Legend piped up cheekily, moving their glasses of orange juice to the living room. 

I rolled my eyes. Smart ass. 

Yoshi gestured to a cup on the counter. "I made you tea. Figured something more relaxing than caffeine would make you feel better."

My heart may have skipped a little, but I didn't let it show as I grabbed my mug and said my thanks. I sipped at it, and the warmth from the tea immediately made me feel more at ease. I eyed the boys over my cup. They were both eating in front of the TV now, looking happy and refreshed. Almost like yesterday hadn't happened. 

It always astounded me how resilient kids and their emotions are. They could be hurt over and over again, be put through impossible situations and have stresses well beyond their years put on them, but they never failed to bounce back and welcome the world with open arms. Part of me knew that was chalked up to the naivety that comes with being young and feeling invincible. However, another part of me, and I wasn't sure how big or small that part was, was jealous at their ability to ignore the imminent pain that comes with that kind of approach to life in exchange for being able to feel all of the good things. 

My concentration was broken when Yoshi checked me lightly with his hip. My eyes flicked over to him to see that he brought our food to the counter and set my plate in front of me. 

"Thanks," I murmured, not realizing how hungry I was until I saw my plate. I dug in greedily, not even caring that my pancakes were smothered in way too much whipped cream. Yoshi poked at his own and laughed. 

"He went a little overboard with it, didn't he?"

I choked on a laugh and nodded, shrugging a bit. "Still tastes great though."

Yoshi took a bite and hummed his agreement. "It does. I just couldn't stop him. He was having so much fun decorating them and before I knew it, I couldn't see the actual pancakes anymore."

"Snowballs turn into avalanches," I responded, shaking my head as I watched the boys. Legend was now sneaking bites off of Ven's plate while our little brother wasn't paying attention. "That's what I've learned every since I got these two."

Yoshi paused in his meal to watch them too. Venice had noticed Ledge's thievery and graciously handed over his plate in exchange for the whipped cream Legend had pushed to the side of his own plate. Classic. 

Yoshi looked at them with such a fond look in his eye, it warmed my own heart. I strongly believed nobody could love these boys as much as I did, but it was starting to look like Yoshi might be catching up to me. 

He tilted his head towards me and saw me watching him. "You know," he started, "I say this a lot, but you've done such a good job with them, Reagan. They're so lucky to have you in their lives."

The unexpected compliment brought tears to my eyes. With my own views on my shortcomings as a parent and sister, Yoshi saying that to me meant so much more than if he would have called me smart or beautiful. I dropped my fork and touched his arm, pulling him slightly towards me. When he was close enough, I leaned in to touch my lips to his cheek. His slight stubble pricked at my lips as I whispered softly. 

"Thank you."