Never My Intention

prologue.

Nineteen year old on a television screen. How many nineteen year olds could say they were on an MTV platform for the music they made at that age? There wasn't many.

Me and my entire family had crowded around the silver box television screen that would show my face. Every time we'd get a sneak peek of what was next and my time was coming closer and closer, I felt my heart pounding in my chest. The black snapback with the EST19XX shirt on, Cleveland as my background just to show I repped as hard for the city I rapped about. It felt like my world was going into slow motion, but also going at this crazy hyper speed I couldn't stop.

Slim sat beside me, camera in his hands as he got it ready for whatever. Dub was right next to him. Slim even got out his phone, taking more footage to put up and send to family later. In the back, we had a giddy Ashleigh and her young cousin, Hailey in the back. A bowl of popcorn sat in front of Hailey on the coffee table that she munched on every now and then. The others that occupied the couch were Ashleigh's siblings, Joe and his, at the time, girlfriend and her sister Lauren. On the loveseat sat Bridge, her sister, and Xplosive.

As soon as the male on the television began to introduce me as an artist, I was practically shaking. I quickly grabbed the camera from Slim to start recording, Ashleigh's ear deafening scream being the first thing you heard.

I passed off the camera and all of us watched in excitement. It was obviously the first time I was seeing my face on the television. My biggest moment of 2010 that I had encountered. I felt as if I could take on the world.

I was holding my breath for what seemed like forever until it had ended and gone to commercial. That's when I hopped around like a maniac, the big gray sweats I wore practically falling to my knees. They were hand me downs so it was almost a given that they wouldn't ever really fit correctly.

My heart was beating at this crazy rapid pace, a few jokes and whatnot were made before we had turned off the camera.

"Dude.." I said, looking over to Slim who sat on his laptop and had a big grin on his face. "He said my name!" I exclaimed for the fiftieth time as Ashleigh and Hailey both laughed.

"I'm still shaking." Ashleigh said, showing proof that her hand was moving at this crazy speed. Hailey smirked and slapped it away before her eyes landed on me.

"Think you're gonna walk outside and more people will recognize you?" Hailey asked with a smile which I returned.

"Shit, we can only hope, huh?" I said with a laugh.

The group of us had eventually made our way into the basement where I was currently crashing. I lived with Ashleigh's mom, Bridge, at the time. She took me under her wing as if I were her own after Slim and I lost the condo we lived in. Downstairs was a queen sized bed to the far left, unmade and a mess. In the middle was a green futon friends or even myself ended up sleeping on along with an old coffee table Slim and I bought for ten bucks from a garage sale. And to the far left was where the magic happened.

There was a long L shaped desk that held all of the equipment we used to record - computer, tons of notepads, pens, and magazines scattered on it. The keyboard Slim and I bought with a huge bag of nickels to help make beats sat in the corner. One of the rooms in the basement we turned into the booth. It wasn't much, but it was quiet and kept the music flowing out.

I sat down on the couch with Slim and Xplosive, Hailey and Ashleigh sitting in the swivel chairs by the desk. The screen of the computer was still on, showing the progress we had made before the show had come on that afternoon.

"That shit is crazy." Slim said finally to break the silence as Xplo chuckled softly. "Hopefully when I wake up, I got all the girls that dissed me calling my phone." He joked, causing a few more laughs.

"Don't get so ahead of yourself." Ashleigh said, taking the pillow that sat against the back of the chair to toss at him. He just laughed and placed it down beside him.

"Proud of you though, K." I heard Hailey say, a smile on her face as everyone agreed. "Only up from here, right?" She encouraged.

I gave her yet another smile before I looked around the basement we were in. We were going to do something more than work in the basement and small shows at dive bars. We were made for this life.

"I just hope y'all know now," I started and everyone listened, "I'm in this for life, muhfucka, and I'm taking y'all with me."

I said it and I meant​ it.