I'm Not Okay [EXO's BaekHyun fanfic]

Chapter 1

"So, Baekhyun, how are you liking the hospital? Are the doctors treating you well?"

You sink back in your chair, watching your father grill Byun Baekhyun about his time at the hospital. Of course he was eager to know, since as the hospital's head surgeon, he'd had a hand in getting him the job.

"I like it." Baekhyun offers a genuine smile. "I've been assigned to the emergency room, but I haven't done much yet. I'm only watching."

"Well, that's not unusual for an intern." Your dad grins. "I'm sure Eunjin can show you the ropes at the hospital, right sweetheart?"

Your sister nods shyly, blushing, and it makes you want to throw up. Anyone who knew your sister knew that she wasn't shy about anything, especially when it came to men. It was all an act in front of your dad. You would have given anything to skip this dinner tonight, but the fact that Byun Baekhyun was here....well, okay. That was enough to convince you.

Your families had been friends for the longest—Baekhyun's father had been a doctor at the hospital since you were little, so you'd grown up with him. To be honest, you and Baekhyun had been really close growing up. He was a little older than you, but he had always talked to you during high school, and even come to hang out during the summers. It had even seemed like he had a crush on you!

But it seemed like now was time to face the music—Baekhyun was studying to be a surgeon (like your older sister Eunjin), and had already entered the hospital as an intern. You were studying medicine, too—well, veterinary medicine. That had put you on your father's bad side.

The deal had already been sealed. Both families couldn't have been more thrilled, and the matchmaking process had already begun. The image of your sister: athletic, smart, and a doctor, marrying to Baekhyun was almost too good to be true for your parents. Any glimmer of hope that you had of pursuing a relationship with him had been quickly extinguished. Now you had been relegated to the end of the dinner table, out of the conversation. Everyone talks a little more before the food finally arrives.

"It looks delicious!" Your dad comments. Ugh. He was never this nice to anyone.

"_________-ah! Don't you think that's too much?"

You look up at the sound of someone calling your name for the first time all evening. It's your mom, who gives you a look of disgust. "Really? That couldn't have waited until later?"

She motions to your food. Everyone else has ordered the chef's special: a small bowl of pasta and tomatoes, sitting on a bed of salad. It was practically an appetizer! You've opted for something a little more...substantial. A pizza the size of your plate sits before you, with a few rolls of bread. It would be stupid to go home hungry, right?

"That's the reason she never lost her baby fat." Your mom clears her throat. "She's eaten like that ever since she was a kid!"

"Mom!" You choke, horrified.

"What?" She shrugs. "You come from a family of doctors! You should know better! No one would think we're from the same family!"

Her words hurt, and the whole table stares at you. You look to Eunjin for help, but she looks down at her plate. Ouch. Even Baekhyun's eyes meet yours briefly, and you look away out of embarrassment.

"You are a bit chubby." The blood in your veins turns to ice as your dad sniffs. "You'll just have to learn to be like your sister."

Your cheeks are on fire, and it takes everything in you not to get up from the table. But...they were probably right. Everyone in your family was extremely athletic. Both of your parents ran a marathon every year, and go to the gym three times a week. Eunjin goes every day. It seemed like they were on perpetual diets as well. You didn't even eat that much, and you'd never had a problem with the way that you looked. At least, not until now.

~~~

After dinner is over, everyone mills around in front of the restaurant, deciding where to go next. Everyone votes for drinks, but you decide to duck out early. Why risk more comments about your weight? Besides, you had an exam this week, and although your parents didn't go for many excuses, studying was one that they did.

"Aren't you coming, honey?" Your mom calls out.

"No, I'm going to go back to study some more." You say. "I'll just take the subway. It's fine."

"You are not taking the subway by yourself." Your dad says firmly. "Not this late."

What were you supposed to do now? You had driven together with your family.

"I'll go with her." Baekhyun pipes up.

You give him a surprised look, as does everyone else. "I've got some paperwork to pick up at the hospital, anyway. It's on the way there."

For a moment, it seems like it won't work. But your dad shrugs and waves you away.

"Go ahead. Thanks, Baekhyun." Eunjin gives you a critical eye, but Baekhyun esorts you to the subway station. It's a quiet, awkward walk, and Baekhyun finally breaks the silence on the train.

"You usually talk a lot." He chuckles. "Is something on your mind?"

"It's nothing." You shake your head.

He shifts his grip on the plastic strap above you. The train is a bit crowded, but he let you have the empty seat.

"I know you well enough to know it's not nothing." He laughs. "Is it about what your mom said?"

Your whole face heats up. The fact that he remembers it is embarrassing enough, let alone bringing it up.

"I wish she wouldn't say things like that." You mumble, picking with your fingernail. "She acts like I'm still a kid. So what if I still have my baby fat? No one cares!" You rant.

"No one thinks you're a kid." Baekhyun corrects you, moving as the train stops to pick up more people. You stand, letting a little kid with this mom have your seat. "And you don't have baby fat."

You snort. "Who are you kidding? Have you seen my sister?"

"This isn't about your sister." He says, looking at you. "As far as I'm concerned, you have the body of a woman. I'm doctor, so trust me. I would know."

You blush intensely at the comment. Um, what?

"Come on." Baekhyun grins. "Let's get off here."

He tugs you off the train, despite the fact that your stop is another twenty minutes away.

"Let me take you on a date." He smiles, hopping on the slow escalator to the main road. "What do you feel like? There's this great shopping plaza near the hospital-"

"Baekhyun, stop!"

You pull your hand out of his, looking at him in confusion. "What are you talking about? A date? What about your parents? And my sister?"

"Maybe you are still a kid in here?" He teases, thumping your forehead. "We're grown up. We don't have to tell anyone! Don't tell me you don't know what a secret is?"

"Of course I do." You huff defensively. "But why are you doing all this?"

"Because of this." He leans down and kisses you on the cheek, and you freeze.

"B-B-Baekhyun!" you exclaimed

"I like you." He says firmly. "What my parents or your parents thinks doesn't matter to me. I don't like your sister like that, or the way that they talk to you. Just because you don't look like them doesn't change the fact that I can hug you, or talk to you, or the fact that you're one of the smartest people I know."

"Baekhyun.." You bite your lip, a smile lingering.

"That's what I wanted to see." He squeezes your hand. "Now where do you want to go?"