Unexpected //Jack Gilinsky

Chapter 10

"So Lexi, I haven't talked to you in ages. How is Los Angeles? I want all the details." Tayler says, munching on her burrito.
"Okay, this will be dramatic." I start off, earning an eyebrow raise from Tayler. I tell her the basics of LA and then I go deep into the story about Jack, even telling her about Eve and Nate. I left off the part about Matt and I kissing, I hadn't even told Ali yet. I didn't know if I was going to say anything or not.
"Wait wait wait, I saw Jack Johnson on your Snapchat awhile back but I wasn't sure if that was like, real or not. So you actually know them? And Matt Espinosa?" Tayler scoffs, shaking her head in disbelief.
"I really do. One more thing to this story though..Matt drove me to the airport this morning, right? Well he kissed me." I nervously say. I knew my cheeks would heat up again, and I wasn't even quite sure why. It wasn't like I felt anything for Matt.
"No he didn't!" both Ali and Tayler tell in unison. They were so loud it startled the poor old man sitting in the table beside us. He must have jumped a foot out of his chair, and he said "oh".
"He really did, and then I said," I start to say, but Tayler interrupts me.
"You must get excited easily you little caveman?"
"What? Oh my gosh Tayler!" I shout and all three of us girls interact in a fit of laughter. It was the most natural form of fun. I loved to laugh, I hated how I sounded but laughing was so joyful. I loved other people laughing too.
"Okay, what did you say?" Tayler asks. Ali had her head resting on her hand, her elbow on the table. She was listening intently now.
"I just kind of told him that I didn't think we should do that. And then I freaked out because he looked sad so then I kissed him." I splurge and Ali rolls her eyes.
"I thought you liked Jack?" Tayler says, taking a sip of her lemonade.
"I do. Well I don't know if I do. I'm mad at him."
"Do you like Matt?" Ali asks, tucker a strand of hair behind her ear. I shrug my shoulders and adjust in my seat.
"I don't know, I don't think so? He's really nice and he cares about me." I note. I had so many reasons that I could want to be with Matt. I had one reason in particular that I didn't want to be.
"You kissed him, don't lead him on." Tayler offers.
"He kissed me first." I fight, shrugging again.
"Then you pulled away. Then you kissed him and now he thinks you like him." Ali says, using hand gestures.
"Well, enough about me. Tayler how has Bend been?" I change the topic
"Super boring. I don't want to talk about me. Your life is more interesting. Love triangles, Los Angeles heat. Hanging out with stars. Let's talk about you." Tayler rolls her eyes.
"I want to talk about you. If you're so bored here move, just get out." I insist.
"Where am I supposed to go?" asks Tayler.
"Come home with me." I joke around.
"I will." Tayler says. Her eyes looked serious, but she had to be joking. Ali and I laugh a little, awkwardly.
"Yeah that'd be cool." I say, shaking my head.
"No really, can I? Please? I am dead serious. Super serious." she says, nodding her head crazily.
"Tayler, really how would that work?" I ask her.
"I have some money saved up, I'll stay with you until I get a job and move out? Huh please?" begs Tayler. She had puppy dog eyes, I almost envisioned drool coming out of her mouth.
"Tayler as cool as that would be, how realistic is that? I mean really. It's last minute and that's just not a good idea. There's only two bedrooms in my apartment up there, you can't just live on my couch." I reason. The light in her eyes dims, and she looks upset.
"You're right, that was stupid. I'm an idiot right?" she sighs.
"No! No why would you think that? It would be so much fun, and I mean who says we can't do it? What I mean is it would just need some more planning. You'd need to talk it over with your family and everything you know? Maybe we can do it, maybe we should just wait for like Christmas break to work it all out and make it happen?" I say. I didn't want her to be upset, it really was a fun idea. It would be fun for her to live with Eve and I. She'd love LA too.
"Are you joking? You aren't kidding are you?" she says, widening her eyes.
"No I'm not joking. It would be cool." I say.
"I'm not kidding are you kidding?" Tayler says again. I shake my head and giggle.
"Okay but for real Tayler I am not kidding. Plan it out, make it happen. You'd love it there." I tell her.
"I want to come." Ali groans.
"Too bad you are in school still right Ali." I tease.
"When can I visit?" Ali pleads.
"Remember, Christmas break. You'll get two weeks off and you can come up like the weekend after it starts so I won't be working and then stay with me until I come down for Christmas or whatever. We will figure it out." I pinky promise her, and she smiles and nods her head. I had too many siblings who probably would love to come, but it was a better idea for just the oldest to come. She could fly alone and handle herself for the most part while she was here. It'd be like hanging out with a friend, not babysitting.
"I just texted my mom and told her I was going to make this happen." Tayler eagerly says, she was tapping her hand in the table.
"Okay." I say laughing. She wasted no time. I hoped this would turn out okay, our apartment wasn't huge but it wasn't tiny. There was room, but I just didn't know where she'd be able to put all her stuff. Eve and I didn't have enough belongings to fill all the extra closets so maybe she could just use on of those until she eventually found somewhere of her own. Once she got a job she'd need to help with rent, because Eve and I already have a hard enough time paying. We got payed pretty well, and we had been able to pay pretty easily the last couple months, it was just that we were girls and we always went shopping and we had to buy food and all these extra things. Eves dad sent her money all the time to help out, and it really did help out. Sometimes we'd use the money to add to rent, or sometimes she'd go grocery shopping or sometimes we'd pay our phone bills with it. Whatever we needed at the time.
"My birthday is soon you know. January third." Ali says.
"I know it." I tell her.
"What are you going to get me?" she wonders, twirling her hair around her finger.
"I don't know yet. Something cool from LA." I mention. Ali's eyes light up and she gets really hyper.
"They have so many cool stores there buy me like twenty different things from each one!" she shouts.
"Calm down. I'll get you like three things from one store." I say.
"Why only one store?" Ali asks.
"I'm not made of money." I tell her, raising my eyebrows.
"I don't know that sweatshirt you are wearing was probably like seventy dollars." she huffs. I didn't know if she was being spoiled or just joking. I let the conversation go and decide to go on my phone. We had been at the restaurant over an hour probably, but Ali was still picking at her plate of food so I didn't want to rush her. Tayler and I had finished a little bit ago, not everything was gone but neither of us are anymore of it. Tayler's eyes were glued to her phone and Ali's eyes were glued to her plate so I took out my phone and went through my notifications. I had a message from Matt and some Instagram pop ups about people posting or what not.
Matt: You should have seen the look on Gs face when he heard me telling Johnson about this morning
My stomach flipped. I didn't want Matt telling everyone and especially not explaining it to Jack.
Me: You told Jack?
Matt: Not exactly I was telling JJ about it and Jack heard cause he was in the car too..
Me: Oh
Matt: He was so angry looking it was great
Me: Look don't take this the wrong way but I'm not sure exactly my feelings for you okay Matt and I just wanna ask you to please not tell everyone about this morning??
Matt: I only told J, I won't tell anyone else..
Me: I wish you hadn't even told Johnson. He already texted me about it
Matt: It's chill, don't worry
I had nothing to say to Matt right now, I didn't know exactly how to answer him. I wanted to ask him more about Jacks reaction. Matt said he looked angry, but I felt like it was probably amusement. Disgust maybe.
"Lexi!" shouts Ali, waving her hand in front of my face.
"Huh?" I ask, whipping my head back into reality.
"Are you ready to go?" asks Tayler. Both the girls were standing up and had their things.
"Oh, yes." I jump up. We had the check already and I payed while Tayler and Ali got out in the car.
"Thank you." I politely tell the cashier at the front desk and leave. I didn't want to sound like a money hog, but I hoped Ali didn't want to go out and do any more things while I was down. This had just costed forty five dollars already, and I didn't even bring that much down. I brought two hundred from savings. Just in case. I wanted to bring most of it back up and put it back though.
"What are we going to do now?" asks Ali once I'm in the car. I buckle up and look at her.
"If anything let's just drive around. I don't feel like going in anywhere else." I say, backing the car out of its parking spot.
"Yeah I'd have to agree Ali." says Tayler. I flip on the radio and Tayler blasts it. I guess she liked the song. I bopped my head along to the rhythm, I didn't know the words. We had a fun time, driving around for what seemed like hours. We probably would've gone for way longer until my mom called Ali wondering what was taking us so long.
"I had so much fun you guys." Tayler says stepping out of the car. We were back at my house now and it was actually pretty late. We were gone for four hours I guess. So it was nine now, and I was exhausted. My flight wasn't long at all this morning but I still felt like I needed sleep because of it.
"We did too." I answer for Ali and I. I use the key to lock the car.
"I'll message you about what we talked about over dinner." Tayler says, walking over to her car.
"Oh yeah, for sure." I say, waving her goodbye.
"I'm bored." Ali whines as I open up the door.
"Ali we just got home!" I say, throwing the keys on the counter. No one was in the living room or kitchen. People in my house went to bed pretty early, or a least they retreated to their rooms.
"I know but we just got home and now I'm bored. Do my make up or something." Ali offers. I wasn't good at make up, she had lots on anyways.
"No Ali, you've got make up on already. I'm really tired anyways. Where does mom have me sleeping?" I ask, kicking my shoes off by the front door.
"Oh okay I guess. You have a blown up air mattress in my room, but we figured you could just move it into the living room because my rooms not very big." she says, walking off down the hall. I follow her and help her drag the queen sized mattress into the living room. I always loved our house. It want very big or fancy but it was cute. It was four bedrooms so when I moved out Marissa took my room and stopped sharing with Ali. Jaxon and Mason still shared, and of course my mom and stepdad took the master bedroom. My mom remarried when I was eight years old, after Ali was born. Maybe that's why Ali and I were closer than the rest of my siblings. I loved them all the same but Ali and I shared the same father, I couldn't say the same for Mason, Jaxon and Marissa. All the bedrooms were pretty nice, they had fairly large closets inside of them to say the least. The kitchen was big, and stone tile covered the floor. Our cabinets were big and we had a view of the nice big backyard from the window. Our living room was home to our favorite part, the fire place. We liked the fireplace because we had a chimney and around Christmas time we'd always hang our stockings there and then we'd pretend Santa was coming through. It was a childish game, and it was soon broken by the time I was twelve. Yes, my mom let me believe in Santa until I was twelve years old. When I found out it was just a kids tale I was so mad at her for making me believe in it until I was practically a teenager. I didn't talk to her for days.
"I'll go get a pillow and blankets." Ali tells me. I nod my head and center the air mattress in the living room. I didn't want it to be slanted more to the right past the edge of the couch, it was bothering me. Ali comes back with the pillow and blankets and I thank her.
"I'll see you in the morning!" I call to her as she walks back to her room. My suitcase sat by the fireplace and I unzip it to search for something more comfortable to change into. My house was oddly chilly and so I grabbed some sweatpants and a big shirt to change into. I also grabbed my toothbrush and toothpaste so that I could brush my teeth after I changed and didn't need to make another trip. Carefully and quietly I walked to the bathroom in the dark. It was just the small one by the kitchen, just the half bath. All it had was a toilet and sink, and there was much space in it to change but I managed. I turned the faucet on before I started to change. I wanted the water to heat up. I had a weird thing about brushing my teeth, I would only brush my teeth with warm or hot water unless I had no other choice. It felt cleaner and the toothpaste would foam up. It was odd, I was odd. I strip myself free of clothes and then pull clothing back onto my body, creating a cold warm chain reaction. Then I brush my teeth quickly and head off too bed. Not even two minutes after I settled on the air mattress and got all snuggled up, my phone dinged and buzzed next to me. I mentally groan and reach over to grab it. It was a text message, from Jack. From Jack Gilinsky. I was taken aback, and I was confused. He hasn't meant to text me, there was no way he meant to text me. I hesitated to open it. What if it was something mean, what if it was him confessing his hatred for me in words instead of looks. I take a deep breath and open it. The message said "We miss you already);" and had an attachment. I clicked to load it and it was a picture of both Jacks. They were making pouty faces. I didn't know what to do, I didn't know how to respond. They missed me? Both Johnson and Jack? I wasn't so sure about it. That totally had to be for Madison, there was just no chance it wasn't.
Me: Was this meant for me?
I nervously waited for Jacks reply. I was guessing he wasn't even going to answer. Five minutes passed, and then ten. He wasn't going to answer, it wasn't meant for me. But then, my phone dinged and I scramble to open it up.
Jack: Yes
So all he says is yes. Really simple. Really open. How can I even answer it now? How am I supposed to answer to that. I needed to just, to just ask him what he meant by it.
Me: What do you mean?..
Jack: I mean that J and I miss you?
Me: Are you sure J AND you miss me?
Jack: I'm pretty sure I know the own thoughts in my head
Me: I'm pretty sure you've been an ass to me for months now
Jack: I'm pretty sure I was confused because I didn't know how to react to you turning me down
Me: I'm pretty sure that you made me feel so small
Jack: I'm sorry Lex, I don't want to be angry anymore
Me: I just want it to be like it used to be
Jack: Me too
Me: I really want us to be friends
Jack: Me too
Me: Me too
Jack: Bff
Me: Heard that before
I was trying to be cautious. I didn't want to just let him mesmerize be all the sudden like before.
Jack: Last time I rushed into things and I wasn't careful about your feelings
And it was too late. He was already being the sweet boy I met and my heart was beating in my chest really dangerously. Too fast.
Me: Madison?
Jack: We're still together. I just realized you're a super cool person and I was dumb to be rude just because I let a moment get the best of me. No hard feelings, I think you and Matt are cool together.
Me: Matt and I aren't together
Jack: Well you kissed, and it seems to me you hang out a lot..
Me: I don't think I like him like that
Jack: He likes you like that
Me: I know
My head was going crazy right now. Everything was happening so fast and I was overwhelmed. Finally Jack was being normal with me, and he was basically just telling me to be with Matthew.
Jack: Let's chill when you get back
Me: Okay
Jack: Goodnight
Me: Night
I was more than glad he said goodbye. I couldn't stomach talking to him for any longer right now. I had butterflies and my head hurt and I kind of wanted to cry. I tried to close my eyes, I tried to sleep. But when I closed them and tried to be left alone in the dark my thoughts were flooded with images of him. And when I opened my eyes and stared into the dark of my house I imagined him laying next to me, or walking through the archway from the kitchen. Baffled and full of emotions, I try and think of something else. Suitcase. Suitcases were weird, suitcases were like mini closets that zipped up. Then my mind trailed to the fact that I had barely anything here. Just a couple outfits and some shoes. I was in a place that I once held all of my belongings in, the place I spent all of my free time at. But nothing of my own was here anymore, and it felt really strange. I used to have my own bedroom here and I was entitled to do what I wanted and now I was sleeping in the living room, on an air mattress. I actually felt kind of sad, but everyone grew up. And everyone moved out of their parents home.

"Hey Lexi can you help me with this? I'm trying to make pancakes and bacon but I can't find the spatula." my mom asks me. I nod my head and search the drawers. I didn't see it anywhere either. There were spatulas but she had this special one that she always used to make pancakes, I didn't know why. I looked in the dishwasher and saw it sitting in the silverware holder.
"These clean?" I ask.
"I believe so, yes." my mom quickly says, moving around the bacon in the pan. It smelled so good, and the sizzling added a nice touch to the rest of the background noise in the house. Marissa was in the shower, and her singing filled the house. I didn't think she knew that we could all hear her. Ali was sitting at the square oak table on her phone, and Jaxon and Mason sat on the couch in the living room, watching cartoons. I grab the spatula out and hand it to my mom. She had a certain art to flipping pancakes, ever since I was little I loved to watch her. It wasn't like she was flipping pancakes in a supernatural way, it was normal. She just scooped it up onto the spatula and flipped the wet side into the pan. But I for some reason liked to see how her arm turned and it was so weird. Maybe I just loved to adore my mom. I just liked to know she was moving and breathing and living. If that sounded creepy I guess I was creepy.
"Where are all the plates?" I ask, they weren't in the usual cupboard. My mom points over to the cupboard on the opposite side of the kitchen. I wondered why they just randomly moved them, they had always been in the same spot ever since we moved in.
"Food is gonna be done soon, we are just waiting on the pancakes. Ali go and get your sister and brothers, tell them to come sit at the table. Lexi, will you grab some cups and the orange juice out of the fridge?" my mom asks us. Ali peeps a "sure" and then runs off to do her chore. I grab the cups and set them on the table then pull the juice from the fridge. Mom always wanted us to have juice with breakfast, and it was always either orange or apple. Rarely she'd buy grape juice, which was a shame because I loved grape juice. She'd never have more than one kind of juice, which I thought was a huge problem when I was little. She picked up these habits from grandma, and I was sure I picked up habits from my mom that I was totally unaware of. I was curious to know what we did the same actually. I adored my mom, she was so cute. She did so many things right and had the best was if doing everything. She never got road rage, she always prayed before eating and she would almost always take a sip of her drink with her pinky stretched out. The little things made her the most beautiful woman I'd ever known, and I honestly hoped that one day I could be remembered like she would be. Everyone is seated at the table now patiently waiting for my mom to serve the mouth watering food onto their plates.
     "Sit down Lexi, I'll start serving it up." orders my mom. I pull of my seat and plop down. My mom went around the table filling people's plates, and I filled my glass with juice while I waited for my turn. We didn't eat until my mom said grace, she was very persistent on that. As my family and I ate our food I felt very content. All of us sat in our pajamas still, messy hair and sleepy eyes. Besides Marissa, she had showered and gotten dressed. But that was besides the point. I didn't realize how much I missed this until I had the chance to be doing it again. I happily munched on my pancake and took gulps of orange juice, and I conversed with my mom. I told jokes to my sisters and I watched how my brothers ate food. I didn't want to miss a thing anymore. I wanted to always remember my family just like this.