Happier With You

The Truth

You audibly gulped, "Can we go out for coffee today, after the reading?" There was a special tension in your voice. He skimmed his eyes over you, Ben knew you inside and out. To him, it was evident you wanted to say something important.

"Yeah, of course. Is everything alright?" He cupped your cheek with his soft hand. His touch only made you uncannily nervous. You couldn't resist it any longer, your fragile hand was then placed on top of his as you leaned into his touch.

You let out a staggered sigh, "Yeah." The doors nearby creaked. "Hey Y/n, would James and Ange–oh uh hi Ben," Sebastian entered the kitchen. Ben let his hand fall from his place and turned back to his meal, "Hey." Sebastian could see the moment he just ruined, instead of feeling ashamed he felt some sort of pride. Your eyes were wide open for him, he said James name.

"I'll, uh see you in 20," he was heading back to the door before Ben stopped him. "Go ahead, ask Y/n the question." You looked towards Sebastian in a pleading way for him to not. "Uh, it's nothing important," he left without another word.

Ben knitted his brows, "Who's James?" The question made your heart flutter. You put your acting skills on the plate, "He's a 5 year old, son of one of my mums close friends." You fiddled with your fingers. He only hummed.

This situation between you and Ben made it truly uncomfortable, "Ben, this thing...between us, it's out of hand. I don't want to be around you and feel like there needs to be some distance." He let out a shaky sigh.

"For a moment I thought you were implying for us to be distanced," he placed his hand on his heart. You slightly giggled, "No, just trying to mend our broken relationship." He nipped at his bottom lip, "I wouldn't call it broken."

"Really? Do you remember the night I kicked you out of the flat.. the night you never returned?" You didn't let your tone become flat. His eyes gazed at the table, "Yeah, ok." You nudged at his arm, "Hey, this melancholy needs to go."

He chuckled and pulled you in for an unexpected hug. Your breathed in his scent. Ben broke the hug and grabbed your empty salad tray, "Let's go before they start without us."

**

"I never got to congratulate you on being Hamlet. It was great to hear that you finally acted someone you dreamt of," you paced the sunny sidewalk along Ben. He chuckled, "Did you go see it?"

You slowly shook your head, "I was busy." "Busy? Last time I heard you had a job was since Civil War, a minute on the screen if I recall," he playfully said rubbing his chin with his left hand. Something shiny caught your eye, you've never really seen it since you were entranced with Benedict's appearance. It was a golden ring on his ring finger.

Ever since he left, you've been oblivious about his secret life, you never knew he got married. It was a magnet to your eyes, you couldn't stop staring it. He followed your gaze and sheepishly but his hand down. "You didn't know..," He said it more like a statement rather than a question.

He couldn't get a response from you, a guy with a camera bombarded the conversation. "Hi Ben. Hi Y/n," he was a civilian with an enthusiastic tone, recording everything with his phone. You and Ben just did a small wave and continued to walk but he followed along.

"Gotta say, I'm a huge fan of both of you and I was devastated when you two ended it but I'm so thrilled you two are still friends.. or is it more than just friends," he was walking backwards as you walked forwards.

"Nope just friends. He's married," you kept your gaze forward, not looking at the camera or Ben. "Congratulations on the new baby man. The first baby is a real hassle, the second one is a piece of cake. When's the third one coming?"

It was Ben's turn to speak, "Thank you, I don't know." You felt your heart skip a beat for multiple reasons. One of them was because you didn't know he had kids with another woman and the other because you were afraid he was going to ask about your kids.

"There's been a mystery going on about you Y/n. Do you have twins? People on twitter say you go with 2 boys at a nearby park from your apartment," his question made Ben stop in his tracks.

It's been long enough, you couldn't keep your sons on the down low any longer. "Yes, two beautiful, intelligent, wonderful boys. Pierre James and Aeon Angelo, my twin boys," you proudly spoke to the camera. "How come you're a single mother? Are they Ben's?" He kept asking questions.

"I don't know, things happen for a reason. If they were Ben's, I would be the one with the other golden ring," you rose your hand and showed the lonely ring finger. The civilian thanked you for your time and walked away.

You fearfully turned to Ben, his face spoke a million words. The words his mouth couldn't articulate.  You had taken out your phone and called for an uber. "You have twins?" He finally spoke after a while.

You timidly nodded your head, "I guess we both don't know much about each other anymore." Soon a car pulled up, "We need to talk." You firmly told Ben.  "Are they mine?" He questioned before entering the car.

"You heard what I told the guy," you held the door open. "Bloody hell Y/n, you're an actor for fucks sake. Are they mine?" His tone had completely changed since his last question. You didn't dare to answer.

He shook his head and entered the car, you followed behind. From the corner of your eye you could see him gripping his hands into a fist, about to explode any moment now. He kept a fair distance from you.

Arriving at your hotel, he hurried you to your room. "They're fucking mine and you didn't bother to tell me?" He released his fury as soon as the door shut. "I know it was wrong and I'm sorry, you had the right to know," you stepped away from him.

"You got that fucking right! You decided to keep them a secret from me, how long did you expect this would last?" He was indenting his feet on your room floor.

"I don't know! Long enough until they understood why their father left!" You retorted back. He scoffed, "I left? You kicked me out of the flat!"

"And you never returned!" There was silence in the room. "Now that I'm thinking about it, I'm glad you didn't come back. I spent four amazing years with my two boys, hidden away from the public. They understand more than you do. Every time I come home they're anxiously anticipating my arrival at the door, jumping onto my arms. They understand my work, they understand the sacrifices I have to do, unlike you."

"I understand–" You cut him off, "–Obliviously you don't. Do you not recall our final argument. You were jealous and couldn't understand my work." He strived forward and grabbed you by the wrists.

"I have that night vividly implanted in my memory," he heaved his chest. His arms pulled your body close to him as he pinned you to a wall, "It was the night we lost each other because of our fucking arguments."

You gazed to the side to avoid his lips anywhere near yours. "You kept two of my boys away from me for 5 years now, I'm fucking boiling with rage. I need to meet them," he commanded with his face merely inches from yours.

"No," you shook your head. "I wasn't asking," he let go of your wrists and sat at the edge of your bed waiting for you to call back home.