Destiny (Crawford Collins)

Chapter 5

Chapter Five

I freaked out when I heard his angelic voice because he caught me crying! I thought he wasn’t gonna come? So I wiped the tears that have been streaming down my face because I don’t want him to see me crying. “Wha- What are you doing here? I thought you couldn’t come? And where’s your family?” I asked him confused. “They’re tired so they fell asleep.” He replied. “And why are you here? Arent you also tired? I mean you’ve been greeting and meeting a lot of your fans today.” I asked him again. “I am but I can’t sleep. A fly keeps on irritating me, so since I have nothing to do, I just planned to come here because I want someone to talk to. I wish I can talk to my siblings or parent but they’re asleep so here I am.

I just smiled at him and he sat down beside me and my heart even beats faster than ever. “So what’s the problem?” he asked me and I didn’t answer him for 5 seconds because I was looking for an excuse. “What problem?” I asked him. “I saw you crying okay? So tell me, what’s the problem?” he replied.

“Oh. There’s some dirt that came in my eyes.” I lied. “What a bad excuse, Parker. Tell me. If that’s a secret you can tell me.” He begged. I cleared my thoughts and I don’t know if I can trust him because I just met him and another thing is that I don’t trust guys easily because some of them are jerks and I don’t know if Crawford is one of them or not so I don’t know if I can even trust him.

“I’m sorry but I don’t want to tell it. I didn’t tell this to anyone yet and I’m planning not to. I’m fine.” I told him because I’m so scared to trust someone. “No you’re not. I know the tears that went out in your eyes and streamed down in you cheeks. I can see that you’re broken, you’re hurt. I’m a good friend. You can trust me. If you really don’t want to talk about it with me then talk it out with your other friends. You see, that pain inside your heart will never fade away if you will not express your feelings to someone; you need to let those out so that you can move on but if you will not, that pain will never leave your heart. It will hurt you more if you keep that pain longer. So again, if you don’t want to talk about it with me, talk it out with your other friends. It’ll help you a lot.” He advised me. I just smiled at him and looked up again.

When I heard those words that came out of his mouth, I feel like I can trust him, I feel like his telling the truth. I also remember what Karisma said, Crawford is a good friend and that you keep all your secrets with him because he will never talk about it, in short it means you can trust Crawford. So I thinked about what Crawford said awhile ago and what Karisma also said yesterday. After a minute of thinking, I already feel like I can trust Crawford. So I was just staring at the water and I was thinking if I will tell him or not. I lifted my head and looked at the sky and made my decision.

“His name is Ryan.” I told him while still looking at the sky. I can feel him look at me so I looked at him and just smiled at him until a tear rolled down my eyes. He just stared at me and I can see that his ready to listen to me.

“We dated two years ago, and yes I know I was so young then. I just don’t know how it happened, I like him he likes me and then next thing we know we are already together. I loved him so much that until he broke my heart. I saw him making out with another girl, we’re just 13 that time and he started making out? He also started cheating on girls? I thought he was a gentleman, I also thought he loves me so much. I don’t know what to do because his my first so I just planned to break up with him. I wanna move on and try to be a better person and I can’t do that because you were right Crawf, I should express my feelings so that I can move on and let go of my past.” I told him as some tears streams down my face again.

“Do you want to move one then?” Crawford asked me and I just nodded. “So let me help you. Do you still love this guy?”

“No. I don’t.” I replied. “Then why did this affect you so much? Why can’t you move on?” He asked me like a teacher.

“Because you were right. The pain in my heart will not fade away if I will not express my feelings and second, because I feel like I’m not good enough, I feel like I’m not trying hard, I feel like I’m useless.” I answered honestly. “And why do you say that?” he asked again.

“Because when I saw him kissing another girl, I feel like I didn’t try hard enough and I also feel like I didn’t love him enough as much as he wants. And I also feel useless because when he left me, he didn’t even explain what happened, he just let me go.” I answered and he just nodded and faced front.

“Wait. You told me that you don’t love him anymore right?”  he asked me and he looks kinda confused. “Yes. And I swear I don’t. It’s just that the feelings that I felt when he cheated on me were still here, it never left. That’s why until now, I feel so useless.” I explained. “Then if you don’t love him why did you still remember him? What made you remember him?” he asked me suspiciously.

“It’s because my friend Rachelle called me before you came. She called me because Nathan, his boyfriend also cheated on him. She saw Nathan with a girl and they were also making out and when Rachelle broke up with him, he just let Rachelle go. And so after that my memories flashed back and I remember the time when he made me feel like I was useless.” I told him.

“Oh I thought he just popped up in your mind because if he did you still love him. Anyways, Nathan and Ryan? They’re idiots.” He told me and smirked. When he smirked my heart skipped a beat again, stop doing this please.

“Thanks.” I told him and giggled. “No problem. Just remember if you have anything to say I’m here for you.” He said. My heart was about to stop when he said his for me, my  mind didn’t know what to do so I just smiled.

To be honest, I don’t love Ryan anymore. I hate him. I really do.

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We stared relaxed for like 15 minutes until we noticed the time. “Hey it’s kinda late already and I’m so tired. I need to go now.” Crawford said. “Yeah me too. So, see you nextime.” I told him.

“Maybe I’ll be here tomorrow.” He said and just smiled. Please stop smiling! I still don’t want to fall inlove. “Okay. Good night. Bye!” I told him as I started walking backwards. “Bye. Good night!” he replied.

“Oh Crawford, wait!” I yelled and he looked backed. “Thank you so much for giving me advice to move on. You’ve been a big help! Thank you!” I told him and smiled as wide as I can.

He giggled and said “Anytime!”

So I looked forward again and went home straight. I went to bed with a big smile in my face again. I also thanked God for this day.

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Chaptah 5 guys! I hope you really like it! I'm sorry if it's not long enough but I'll make the next chapter long okay? So now you know why Stella doesnt want to fall inlove. 

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