The Unexpected Journey-A Prince Harry Fan Fic

Chapter 137

A/N: This is a continuation of the last chapter. It jumps back and forth between the "present" where Maddie is on a helicopter landing at Camp Bastion for her visit just before Christmas and the events following the reveal of Harry's upcoming deployment. I really hope the jumps make sense.

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They had made love that night. There in his office, on the rich leather sofa where he had gone to sleep for the night. Harry's offer to leave and Maddie's refusal to ask had moved them both from their stubborn stances, pulled them both to the middle.

Where she was sorry.

Where he understood.

Where they both surrendered the yelling and the arguments, where they let go.

Where they both clung tight.

Where she told him in breathless moans that choosing him was the best decision, that in that choice, she gained everything.

Where he told her that he would choose her over anything, over everything. Where he promised to return; promised to make her a mother.

They had made love that night; deep and heavy and passionate love. It pulled all of their emotions to the surface and left them raw and clinging to the other. And then they had gone to sleep, in their bed. Together.

And Maddie had never felt closer to him. Never more afraid to lose him.

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"Your Royal Highness." The soft accented voice pulled Maddie from her warm memory. Her eyes slid over to Thomas and she smiled. "Is there anything you need?" He nodded towards the door, towards the preparations for them to de-board and she shook her head.

"No. Thank you, Thomas." He nodded and held onto her eyes. And for a moment, she saw the same flash in his eyes as she had seen that afternoon; the afternoon they had told him.

This time it had been different. Before she had been the girlfriend, this time she was the wife. And though she wasn't sure her love for him had changed, or his for her—it certainly looked different from the inside. After they both recovered from that night, after they had made sufficient apologies, after they had moved past that heat filled moment, they had set out together to prepare for Harry's departure.

Before she had been brought into the circle, this time she was bringing people in; very few, select people. She was there when they told Will and Kate, there to see the tears spring to Kate's eyes and the furrow set into Will's brow. She was there when they told Thomas and Bernard; both of them needing to know so that they could work magic to Harry's schedule, so they could be part of the great cover up and subsequently the great reveal. She was in on the discussions about media blackouts, about negotiating away interviews and exclusives. She was there when security began to discuss how to protect Harry the Soldier. She was there for all of it. She was there to watch the concern wash over faces only to be replaced by a get-down-to-business attitude. And she was there to see all of them, every single one of them, flash a glance to her; always checking on her.

And she was there the night they finally told Bishop and Ella. She turned in the helicopter, needing to look away for just a moment; her eyes focusing on the far, dusty horizon as her mind drifted back to that night not too long ago.

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As soon as their security team had swept through Bishop and Ella's home, as soon as they gave the all-clear, Ella was tugging at their hands, pulling them inside.

"It's so good to see you," she hugged Maddie close and tight; her eyes pressing shut as she wrapped her arms around her best friend.

"You too," Maddie smiled, feeling warm there in that space, in the presences of Ella's wide eyes and glowing smile.

"Come in, come in," Ella stepped from Maddie, not noticing the way Maddie's hands lingered on her; not noticing the way her friend wanted to stay in that hug. She turned bright eyes to Harry and Bishop who were just behind them. "I'm glad you were able to come over tonight."

"We're happy you called," Maddie smiled, reaching for Ella's hand as they walked further into the house; noticing dinner on the table, wine uncorked. And her eyes slid to Harry's and he nodded; it was time.

"We actually have something we want to talk to you about," he spoke up, his hands clapping together in front of him.

"Yeah?" Bishop looked from Harry to Maddie and back again.

"Yeah," Harry smiled, small and sweet, to his wife and nodded in the direction of the living room. "Can we have a seat?"

"Sure..." Ella answered, her mind already at work, her eyes focused on Maddie as the four of them stepped away from the food, away from the wine. They settled onto couches; Harry and Maddie on one, Bishop and Ella on the other and as Maddie's hand slipped to Harry's knee, she looked across the coffee table between them at their best friends.

"There's something we need to tell you and..."

"It can't leave this room," Harry leaned forward, his hand closing over hers.

"There are very, very few people who know this..." Maddie swallowed her nervousness and met Ella's eyes. Bishop had done this before, Bishop had held secrets for Harry for years but Ella was new. Yes, she was Maddie's best friend. Yes, she had kept her confidences all these years and yes, Maddie trusted her. But when it came to matters such as these, matters of her husband's safety, Maddie couldn't be more careful. "This is something you can't repeat. To anyone."

"Of course," Ella blinked but didn't falter. Bishop's eyes slid from Maddie's to Harry's and he could see the underlying current. He knew something was wrong. While his wife sat there not knowing what to expect, assuming that maybe, just maybe Maddie was about to announce a baby—Bishop knew better. He knew Harry like he knew himself and the cold set of his eyes was not in line with that of an expectant father.

"What is it?" Bishop's gaze stayed fixed on his friend and all eyes shifted to Harry who took a deep breath, cleared his throat and smiled at Maddie; small and simple. And sad.

And then he turned to Ella and Bishop and he brought them into the circle. "I'm being deployed." Ella gasped. "After the first of the year, I'm flying out on a four month tour in Khundu."

And Bishop's eyes closed.

"Oh my God," Ella spoke through her fingers covering her lips. "Oh my God...Harry..." She shook her head, saddened and worried and then she turned to look at her best friend. "Maddie..."

"It's okay," Maddie's voice wavered as she pulled a smile for Ella.

But it wasn't. It wasn't okay and everyone in the room knew that. As Maddie reached her hand out to Ella, Harry cleared his throat and turned to look at Bishop. But before he could say anything, before either of them could speak, Bishop opened his eyes and rose to his feet and without a glance to anyone other than Harry, he moved from his spot and left the room.

And the door to their back deck closed behind him.

"I..." Ella turned to look at the back of the house, squinting at the large windows. "Maybe I should..."

"It's okay," Harry spoke up, his hand reaching out to Ella as he stood up. "I'll go."

And he did. Harry spent an hour on that deck with Bishop that night while Maddie and Ella sat inside. He spent an hour convincing Bishop that he was going to be okay, that he was going to come back. He spent an hour listening to his best friend warn him and beg him and then, after they were both spent, he stepped back inside; Bishop in tow.

Before, Maddie had been brought into the circle, this time she was bringing people in. And it was breaking her heart.

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When Maddie was finally given the green light to step out of the helicopter, she unclipped the belts holding her in and smiled as she maneuvered from the impressive piece of machinery. Stepping out onto the dry, warm heat of Camp Bastion, she took in the land, the way it felt, the way it looked. She took a slow, deep breath and tried to push aside the emotions that surged forward when she saw all the soldiers, when she couldn't help but pull forth Harry's eyes. Focusing her attention forward, a decorated Captain stepped up to her with a kind smile and alert eyes.

"Your Royal Highness," he made quick work of a sharp salute and then extended his hand to Maddie. "I'm Captain Jonathan Bandeberry, Ma'am. I'll be showing you around Camp Bastion today."

"It's really great to meet you Captain," Maddie shook his hand in hers. "Thank you very much for taking the time to do this."

"Of course," he nodded. "How was your trip in Ma'am?"

"Wonderful," Maddie nodded. "Uneventful and swift."

"Happy to hear it," he smiled again; glancing around at all that awaited them. "Is there anything I can get you before we get started?"

"No sir," she shook her head. "Thank you."

"Very good. Right this way then," he held a hand out, gesturing off to her right. With a grin and an open mind, her tour began.

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For Harry's last deployment, they had saved The Discussion for the night before he left. Of course Harry had delved into preparatory discussions with his family and attorneys. He had spent time with his father, his brother, his sister and then he had spent time with her. And it was that night, in the dark, in his bed, when they had discussed the 'while he was away', it was then that they had discussed the 'what if'. But this time, in all ways; this time was different. The Discussion came much earlier and this time Maddie was in on all of the preparations she hadn't been privy to before.

It wasn't something he sprung on her. It wasn't a surprise. He didn't want to blindside her, he wanted her to know what was coming, wanted her to prepare for it. So he scheduled some time, asked her to meet him in his office one night after their day had ended

And she agreed; knowing it was going to be tough. They had returned from a long day, they had shed their clothes, shed their roles and it was just them. Maddie and Harry in warm, comfy pajamas, settling on the couches in his office; paperwork and documents situated on the table between them. Though there was a fire burning and they were sitting in a space that held heat and intimacy for them, the feeling was very businesslike.

"Here we go," Maddie moved into the room, drinks in hand. Harry's eyes immediately lifted to look at her, to watch her walk in.

"Hey..." He smiled, genuine and sweet, as he took the drink she held out to him. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Maddie returned his kindness and moved to the couch opposite of him; sitting. Tucking her feet up underneath her, she pulled at a large, soft blanket and covered her legs.

"Are you ready for this?" He took a sip from his glass.

"No," she sighed with a small upturn of her lips. "But I suppose I don't have a choice." She took a deep breath and waved her hand in his direction. "Go ahead Captain...let's do this."

"Okay," he nodded and leaned forward. "You already know how to ring the attorneys..."

"Yes," she nodded.

"You know how to access the money..."

"Yes," she looked to her hands.

"And you know that if there is anything you need, all you have to do is ring Thomas and he knows how to make it happen..."

"I do," she smiled. "I do know that."

"Bernard has the house under control."

"Thank God," she chuckled lightly, gaining a smile from him.

"I had a Security meeting yesterday and it's my understanding that Arthur is heading up your security concerns for the Arctic."

"That's my understanding too," Maddie's lips turned down as she remembered; Harry wouldn't be here for her walk. He would miss the vast majority of it all.

"Now I know that..." Harry took a breath. "I know you'll be okay while I'm gone. I know you have things figured out but...if there's any trouble..."

"Your father," she offered, swallowing a sip. "Your father or your brother."

"Yes," Harry nodded and reached for his drink again. "Do you have any questions? Need to know anything else that you don't now?"

"Nothing I can think of," she answered honestly. She had given it some thought and felt like she had a good enough grasp on it all—or at least she knew how to get in touch with the people who had a grasp on it all.

"Ah," Harry moved from the couch as he remembered something. "I nearly forgot..." He moved over to the safe on the wall. "You know how to get in here?"

"Yes," she watched him; curious.

"Good..." He worked the combination and pulled out a long, slim package; shutting the door before returning to his couch.

"What is that?" Maddie leaned forward a bit.

"Cigars..." He sat it down on the table.

"Cigars?" She glanced up at him and then focused more closely on the package. They weren't the ones her father had smoked. "For what?"

"Well," Harry sighed, growing a little sad. "While I'm away...Bishop is going to become a father." His voice cracked as he ran his fingers over the package. "And when that happens...I need to ask a favor of you. I need you to take these to the hospital and smoke them with him and...and congratulate him for me. I need you to mark the moment because...because I can't."

"Harry..." Maddie felt her heart sting in her chest.

"Would you do that for me?" He swung his eyes up to hers.

"Of course," Maddie nodded without thought. "Of course I will."

"Thank you," he smiled and, after a moment let his fingers off the cigars; his eyes sliding to a folder sitting next to them on the table. He took a deep breath and his features shifted in a way that made Maddie nervous. Reaching for the folder, he sighed. "I've signed everything over to you."

"Sorry?" Maddie whispered, not entirely sure what he was saying.

"If...If something happens to me."

"Ah," Maddie's eyes shifted away from his, her heart thumping.

"I'm sorry. I know it's not something you want to talk about..."

"It's not something I want to think about," she clarified.

"But," he continued. "We have to talk about it."

"I know," she finished her drink and sat the glass to the side. "I know we do."

"And if it does," he held up the folder. "I've signed everything over to you. The accounts, the trust, the house, the car..."

"The Aston Martin?" She lifted her eyebrows, allowing the tiniest bit of levity into the room.

"Yes," he smiled across to her; appreciating her attempt at ease. "The Aston Martin."

"Go on," she nodded.

"And I've talked to my father about your title." Harry continued matter-of-factly.

"Sorry?" Maddie looked up to him sharply; confused by his words. "My title?" A small, humored smirk graced her lips.

"I talked to him and he agreed..." Harry took a deep breath and leaned back. "If something happened to me..." He let out his breath and continued. "He said he would remove your title if you wanted."

"Remove my title?" Her voice dropped; surprised. "What? Why?"

"Because in those circumstances your title would become the Dowager Duchess of Sussex."

"But...what makes you think I wouldn't want to be that?"

"You would have to stay here, in London. You would have to continue on with royal duties and continue on with protection and..."

"And?" Maddie lifted her eyebrows, stunned at the direction the conversation was taking.

"And...I don't know. I thought you might want to go away from here; back to Bendal, back to Colorado."

"And leave the only home we've had together?" Something in her voice drew him to a pause. He slowed down; looking her over, searching her face.

"Baby listen..." He leaned forward, wanting to pull her into him. "I would never forgive myself if I left you alone, Maddie. I'm just...I'm trying to make sure that you can do whatever you want. Whatever it is, I want you to have it...if something...if I die out there. I don't want to hold you back..."

"And I don't want to leave our home, Harry." She blinked at unexpected tears, swallowed at a sudden lump. "Please. If I lost you I...I don't want to lose the life we had too, the home we had...I....Please don't make me leave our home."

"No," he whispered, his own heart flooded with emotion. "No. I won't make you leave our home." He shook his head. "Of course I won't. You can...you can do whatever you want. I just wanted you to know it was an option."

Maddie's eyes locked with his as she assured him, "it's an option I would never, ever use." The space between them was heavy with it all; sadness and worry and everything that came with a discussion such as this.

"You would obviously stay in touch with Collins..." He needed to move this along, needed to finish it up.

"I would," she nodded.

"And if Isaiah ever needed anything...for travel or education or..." Harry shook his head and shrugged. "You would take care of him?"

"Yes," she whispered. "I promise."

"And Arthur..." Harry was nearly done; with the list, with the way his heart ached at this conversation. "He's going to need somebody to keep him grounded; keep him normal." He chuckled to himself. "And my charities. Walking with The Wounded, Sentebale...you would make sure..."

"I would," she agreed with a whisper, her emotions getting the better of her as tears began to form in her eyes. "I would make sure that the legacy you built lives on...even if you don't. Harry..."

"I know," he nodded, swallowing back his own tears. "I'm almost done."

"Good," she sniffed. "Because I am too."

"I know," he could see that, he could sense that. They had covered nearly everything.

"What else is there?" She asked; waiting for him to stop, waiting for the time when she could move to his couch and hold him close.

"A funeral," Harry's words echoed in the room and Maddie felt her stomach turn. "There is already a plan in place; a lot of things that are non-negotiable because of..." He cleared his throat. "Because of who I am but...if there's something you want, something you would like to do or...please speak up. Please tell Will or my father and they will do what they can to make it happen." He watched her for a moment; waiting for her to acknowledge what he had just said. And when she did, when she finally nodded, he took a deep breath and rubbed his hands into his hair.

"Is that it?" She asked; hoped.

"It is," he nodded.

And then she was up. Maddie moved from her couch, leaving her drink and her blanket and she moved right into his arms, into his lap; into him. Harry caught her, his arms wrapping around her, his hands pressing her close and his lips turning up; ready to kiss her back.

The last time he had been deployed, he had left behind this amazing woman; bright and beautiful and holding his heart and the hope of a future. This time, he was leaving behind everything.

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Captain Bandeberry had shown Maddie all around the Camp. She had toured nearly every nook and crevice they had. Some of it she recognized from pictures of Harry from before, but much of it was new to her. He was smart and kind and explained things to her without speaking down to her; something Maddie instantly appreciated about him. She had met other soldiers, she had seen demonstrations. And when they neared the end of their tour, when he escorted her back to the mess where she would be eating lunch before photos and a good-bye, he let her in on something he had been keeping to himself.

"I wanted to tell you, Ma'am," his voice dropped in a way that drew Maddie closer; curious. "I served with your husband here at Camp Bastion a few years ago."

"You did..." Maddie's breath caught, her eyes flashing to meet his as her feet stalled. "You served with Harry?"

"Captain Wales," he nodded, a small smile in place. "We flew on different schedules. When he was on, I was generally off and when I was on, he was off." His eyes faded out as he remembered. "Hell of a pilot, hell of a soldier."

"Yes," Maddie agreed, her smile pulling high with pride. "So I've been told. Did you spend time together then? With such conflicting schedules?"

"We did," he nodded. "It's a small group, Ma'am. Tight. Close."

"Sure."

"He spoke of you," the young Captain offered; his face soft, not entirely sure he had the ground to be speaking to her of such things.

"Did he?" Maddie was surprised to hear this.

"I'm sorry," his eyes shifted down. "Maybe I shouldn't speak of such things."

"Nonsense," Maddie laughed lightly. "You should absolutely speak of such things. I'm sure he will be thrilled when I tell him I met you."

"Tell him Johnnie Berry said hello."

"I will do that," Maddie grinned. "Tell me. Are you joining me for lunch? I would love to hear some stories..." She leaned in just a bit. "Particularly any that I might use to gently chide my husband."

"Of course," he chuckled and nodded. "I would be happy to join you for lunch, Ma'am."

"Fantastic," Maddie's eyes danced as they turned down the path to the mess.

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After her lunch with Captain Bandeberry, after group photos and meet and greets, after wishing soldier after soldier a Happy Christmas, after she had done all she had gone to do and then some, Maddie boarded the helicopter to leave Camp Bastion. It had been a beneficial trip for her; and not just in the royal duty sense—though she had made great gains there too.

The soldiers, from top to bottom, were impressed with the new Duchess; with her questions, with her demeanor, with the way she treated them with kindness and respect and the slightest bit of awe. The pictures taken of her that day would go miles in the press; improving her already high approval numbers. She seemed at ease among the soldiers and her smile was radiant. Thomas had stayed behind her the entire day and was himself impressed with the way she moved about, with how quickly she seemed to have adapted to this new lifestyle, to this new aspect of it.

But that wasn't all that Maddie was taking away from Camp Bastion that day. In fact, her personal gains were much greater.

"Ma'am," the pilot called out to her over the radio, her eyes pulling up in his direction. "We're under five from Sandringham."

Maddie smiled wide, her breath sucking into her lungs. "Thank you." Her eyes turned to the window, looking down on the ground below her; blanketed with snow. The family had already arrived for the holiday, Maddie would be the last to join them, and she was eager to join them.

She was eager to enjoy these next few days with her husband, with their family. Because the greatest thing that Camp Bastion had given her, the thing that would sit with her for the next four months—was perspective. Perspective and understanding.

Captain Bandeberry had told her stories of Harry the Soldier that made her smile, stories that made her beam with pride. He had told her tales that made her feel more at ease, that made her release the anxiety she had been feeling and made her trust more; in Harry, in the system, in his training. She had known all along that he had a fine-tuned set of skills, but hearing it from another soldier, seeing the place he had been, how he had served—it somehow made it easier.

And hearing from a third party—the way Harry had spoken of her, that early on, that long ago—it made her heart warm. It made her want to do whatever she could in the next few weeks to put aside his upcoming deployment and focus only on him, on them.

"Ma'am," Thomas's voice called to her and she looked up to him. With a smile, he nodded towards the ground. "It looks as though we have a welcoming committee."

Maddie's eyes shifted as she looked out the window, lower and closer to the ground. And then she saw him. Even from their height, she could see her husband; tall and broad. Dressed for winter and standing in stark contrast to the white snow, he was looking up at the sky, up at the helicopter. Up at her.

"It would appear that way," Maddie sighed into her seat, her head turning to the side so she could watch their final descent. "Thank you for everything today, Thomas."

"Of course," he nodded. "It was a pleasure to travel with you today Ma'am."

Maddie turned her smile to him for a moment, a flash of unspoken understanding passing between them. "Are you off to join family after this?"

"Yes Ma'am," he answered.

"Excellent."

Quiet settled over the cabin of the helicopter as it hovered down; kicking up snow and casting up wind. And then it bounced just so and they were on the ground. This time the doors opened quickly. This time, when Maddie's fingers reached for her buckles, nobody stalled her. They were moving easily and freely out of the helicopter, clearing the way for Maddie and Thomas. She could see Harry stepping forward, could see him shaking hands with the team that had taken her in, the team that had delivered her back. And then he was there, standing at the base of the stairs and holding his hand up to her.

"Welcome back," he squinted as he smiled up at her.

"Captain," she grinned, taking his hand and stepping out of the helicopter; thanking the group of people as she moved. When she was finished, when they all began to say good-bye, to board the helicopter to return to London, Harry held onto her hand and led her away; allowing for the helicopter to take off.

"How was your trip?" He asked when they were finally left alone, moving out from underneath the blades, their feet crunching in the snow.

"Well..." She bit at her bottom lip, holding onto his one hand with her two. "I met an old colleague of yours."

"Oh?" He lifted his eyebrows, looking to her with a smile.

"Johnnie Berry?" She tossed out the nickname Captain Bandeberry had given her.

"Really?!" Harry laughed out loud, his eyes crinkling as he smiled. "Wow. Johnnie Berry. Hell of a pilot. How did you meet him?"

"He was the soldier assigned to show me around," Maddie loved the warmth on Harry's face, the happy look in his eyes. "He introduced me, gave me a tour, ate lunch with me..." She leaned closer to him, nudging his arm with her shoulder. "He told me a few stories about you."

"Yeah?" Harry's voice dropped a bit, his smile pulling higher. "Good stories?"

"Great stories..." Maddie slowed to a stop, tugging at his hand so that he would too. "Hey Harry..."

"Maddie?" His eyes were dancing as he looked to her, fully expecting her to tease him about something she may have learned on her trip, from her conversations with the Captain.

But Maddie had another idea. As she pulled at his hand, she took a step towards him and, clutching his coat in her hands, she brought him to her.

And then her lips moved against his.

She was hot and soft and assertive in her need for him, in her quest to fulfill her need for him. Reacting quickly, his arms moved around her as he angled his mouth over hers; hoping she could feel just how much he had missed her.

"Mmmm..." He moaned, pulling her closer, kissing her deeper. "I've missed you Madeline..." He leaned back, catching her eyes; half open and hazy.

"I've missed you too," Maddie whispered into his mouth, her tongue running soft over his lips; teasing inside. "And I'm so sorry Harry. Sorry for how I've been behaving and..."

"Shhh..." He shushed her, nudging her nose with his. "You don't need to apologize."

"But I do," she nuzzled closer. "I should have been better, I should have been easier on you and..."

"Let it go, love," Harry stopped her. "Please. We're fine. We are fine. Let it go..." He kissed her. "For me?"

"For you?" She sighed. "Anything." She kissed him again. "I love you Captain."

"Oh baby, I love you too."

"Good," she sighed happily. "Good..." She kissed him once more and patted his ass with a grin. "Is everyone here?"

"They are," he nodded, tossing a smirk towards the enormous home. "Probably making fun of us right now."

"Ha!" Maddie's head tipped back just a bit.

"You want to come in?" Though he made the suggestion, he didn't budge. "Begin the Christmas holiday?"

"Sure," Maddie nodded, not moving an inch. "We should go in."

"We should," Harry chuckled, his hands tightening around her. "Or..."

"Or?" Maddie lifted her eyebrows.

"Or..." He leaned in, cocky and sexy, and his lips took hers again. And Maddie, not willing to argue with him when he was like this, sighed and leaned into him. The family could wait, they both needed this. They had very little time left with the other...they could take just a moment longer before they made their way back to the family.