Day 103
"Video Diary, Maddie Sussex..." She smiled at the camera as she rested back against her pillows. "We've arrived in Svalbard and we are at the hotel. We had quite a bumpy flight on the way in. We're doing twenty miles on the skis in the morning and should be leaving for Barneo the day after. I'm excited to get out on the snow with the team, to see what all this training has done for us. We had dinner together tonight and everyone seems to be excited and...ready. There are some amazing people on this trip. The women are so..." She looked off in the distance and took a breath before she looked back. "Already I'm impressed and...humbled that they've allowed me to tag along." She laughed softly. "I suppose after tomorrow we'll see if I'm still allowed. Okay. I'm going to sign off and get a nice, warm night of sleep. More tomorrow. Goodnight."
It had been a long day full of travel and introductions. Though she already knew the team, already felt welcome among them—she had only just that day met the Documentary Crew who would be going along with them on the Trek; filming nearly every moment. They had talked for a bit about logistics, about how filming would start the next day, about how the Video Diaries would be used by all of the teammates, about how they would be conducting interviews with all of the teammates. And though Maddie had been a little leery about any type of media being around, she had known this was part of the deal and she fully supported what they were all trying to do. So she relaxed and decided to let her beef with the press sit aside for a moment and to give these guys the benefit of the doubt. They were documentarians after all—and they seemed very nice.
Moving the camera off to the nightstand, she climbed out of bed and looked for her bag; wanting to pull out a sweatshirt of Harry's she had brought with her—for warmth and for comfort. As she pulled the soft, gray hoodie from her bag, something fell from the pocket landing on the floor at her feet.
"What in the..." She pulled the sweatshirt over her head and bent over to find a small gift wrapped box. She felt silly as her heart pumped wildly in her chest, her lips turning up in a smile as her fingers tore at the wrapping. She moved to sit in the middle of the bed as she lifted the lid off the box and there on top of some folded tissue paper was an envelope addressed to her.
In Harry's handwriting.
Her eyes welled up at the sight, her fingers stroking over the paper before she lifted it up and pulled out the heavy cardstock stationary with his monogram on the top. With a lump resting in her throat she read from the card.
"My best guess is that you found this in Svalbard, probably on your first night. I had to work a little magic and enlist a little help but I simply could not let you begin this trek without something from me. In this box you will find two items that I thought might be important to have along. Keep digging. H."
With a giddiness that should have embarrassed her, she did just as his note said. She pulled back the tissue paper and found a small-ish, lumpy package wrapped in the same paper. This one had a note attached to it.
"I know this is going to be as hard as a rock by the time you get to your goal but I thought the image of you enjoying your Christmas Candy at the North Pole was just too sweet to pass up. Share with your friends-H"
And there, underneath the beautiful gift wrap was a small bag of her favorite candy; more than enough to go around. As she held the bag in her hands she felt warm and happy and loved. When had he planned this? How had he planned this? And who in the world had been brave and bold enough to sneak a package into her luggage? Though she was curious to the answers to those questions, she was more curious about the second of the two packages he told her of.
Pulling back the tissue paper even further, she found a small wrapped box. With no thought to the paper this time, she quickly tore it away, quickly discarded it and she pulled off the lid.
Inside was a small ipod shuffle with earbuds. It wasn't hers and it wasn't his; it was entirely new to her. Just as she was about to ask nobody in particular just what exactly was going on, she pulled the shuffle from the box and saw a small note with simple directions.
"Put in the buds. Press Play.
I love you. I'll see you soon-H"
With a cautious look in her eyes, she did as the note instructed; she put the buds into her ears and she turned on the ipod and pressed play.
And she gasped when she heard his voice in her ears.
"Madeline..." It was so rich and so warm and so close. "Sorry...hold on..." There was a bit of background noise, maybe movement and then he laughed—the sound making her eyes well over as her fingers flew to her lips, trying to hold in the sobs that felt inevitable at this point. She had no idea what this was but so far he had said only four words and she was nearly a mess. "Sorry love. So. If you're listening to this then that must mean you're in the Arctic gearing up for the trek. I hope you found this on your first night. I hope you get this before any of the horrific skiing takes place," he chuckled and took a breath. "Alright. So. Get on with it Sussex...is that what you're thinking?"
Maddie shook her head. No that wasn't what she was thinking; nowhere close, in fact.
"What's happened is this...I've put together a...playlist of sorts. I've collected some songs; some of your favorites, some of mine...some I took with me on the very same trek you're about to embark upon. It's pretty good if I say so myself. I think you'll find the selection to be fulfilling and diverse and...Oh!" She could see the excitement on his face as he exclaimed. "I had a little help from Collins in securing some of the native music of Bendal and...it's on here too." That was it. She was done fighting as tears slid from the corners of her eyes. "I thought...I don't know what I thought..." His voice dipped low. "I thought you might want to take a little of the desert with you to the Arctic. I thought you might want to take a little bit of me with you..." He took a moment, a pause in which Maddie sniffed and sucked in a breath. "I'm terribly proud of you Maddie. Terribly proud. I love you...Harry."
Day 104
"Video Diary...Maddie Sussex..." The great big smile on her face, the wide excited eyes—nobody would ever be able to tell just how tired she was. "We went on our first ski today. Twenty-one miles and...wow..." She laughed, leaning back in her chair and pulling off her stocking cap. Her hair was mussed and her cheeks were pink but she didn't care. "You want to know what's utterly amazing? Michelle—without her right arm. Sheryl—with a prosthetic left leg. Wendy—who suffered from Post-Traumatic stress disorder after a harrowing experience I'm sure she'll detail for you. And Louise—who still has shrapnel embedded in nearly her entire right side." Maddie shook her head in awe, in disbelief. "These women were out there in the snow, on the skis looking better than...frankly, looking better than my cousin Kyle who's been skiing since we were two." She chuckled and took a beat. "This is going to be an amazing experience. The team is so incredibly impressive, so ready to go and we're already..." Her smile pulled higher as remembered the day, the conversations, the already strong bonds that were being formed. "We're already having a great time. Tonight we're having a big dinner and most likely heading to bed early. We take a helicopter to Barneo first thing—weather permitting. And it starts. Okay...that's it for tonight. See you tomorrow!"
After a quick shower and a change of clothes, Maddie had made her way back to the main room for dinner and some conversation. They had enjoyed their last warm, cooked meal for a few weeks and afterward they lazed about; chatting and relaxing. A few brave souls who had no fear of a hangover were sharing a flask of whiskey. It was a big lump of people; the soldiers, the guides, the documentary crew; everyone gathered in a big warm, comfortable room.
When the flask of whiskey was offered to Maddie she shook her head and laughed out loud. No way was she taking that kind of chance. She knew what awaited her in the morning and she knew she was going to have a hard enough time without throwing her system off.
So she sat off to the side, listening and laughing at the tales they told of home, of service. And she felt, strangely, at home. She felt safe and comfortable and at ease among this group of people. And then the man whose job it was to report on all of it sat down across from her, warm mug of coffee in his hand and a welcoming smile on his face. They had met before, spent a little time together on the first day and then again that morning when he was filming their practice ski. But this was the first real conversation they would have.
"Your Royal Highness," he nodded as he sank into his chair.
Maddie finished a sip of her hot tea and shook her head as her eyes turned up to him. "Is there any chance I can persuade you to call me Maddie for the rest of the trip?"
"Yikes..." He sucked in a breath as he smiled at her. "I don't know. I'm sure I could get into trouble for breaking royal protocol."
"You really wouldn't," she laughed and leaned back in her chair. "Maybe we could negotiate? The title when there are cameras, my actual name when there are not?"
"Maybe..." He teased, leaning forward on the table. "But what do I get out of the negotiation? What do you have in trade?"
"Nothing," she held her hands up. "I have nothing...oh wait!" She exclaimed, stuffing her hand into the pocket of her fleece jacket. "I have these." She held out a small fun-sized bag of M&Ms. "What will these get me?"
"Ooooohhhh..." His eyes widened as he grinned. "Those will get you a first name or two."
"Excellent," she laughed and passed them across the table.
"Tell me," he leaned back in his chair, taking the treats with him. "What do you prefer? Madeline or Maddie?"
"Maddie," she shrugged and extended her hand. "Maddie Sussex."
"Andrew," he reached out to shake her hand. "Andrew Bradley."
"Nice to meet you," she smiled. "Unofficially anyway."
"You too."
Maddie watched him for a minute as he tore open the M&Ms and popped a few into his mouth. She had a good feeling about him, had watched him interact with the team, watched as he worked. "Andrew Bradley. That's a great name for a reporter. Have you always had it or did you change something to make it sound more journalist-ish?"
"I've always had it," he chuckled.
"Good," she nodded and thought for a moment; curious about the ease with which they were conversing. "Can I ask you a question?"
"I don't know," he narrowed his eyes playfully. "Is it on the record or off?"
"Ha!" Maddie clapped her hands together. "Off."
"Okay..." He tossed it around. "One question. Go ahead." He knew that developing a rapport, a relationship with Maddie, with the entire team, was paramount to the great footage he was hoping to get. And it was only fair that she had a chance to ask him questions for all that he was going to ask as the days went on.
"How did you get this assignment?" She waved her hand around. "I mean...did you ask for it or was it a short straw situation?"
"An all-expenses paid trip to the North Pole?" His eyebrows lifted. "Are you kidding? I asked for this one."
Maddie smiled, appreciating his answer. "Good. Now, did you..."
"Oh!" He held up a finger. "You said one question. You had your one."
"Aw come on," Maddie rolled her eyes. "I've never had a chance to sit down with a reporter in a casual atmosphere and ask my own questions. One more."
"This one will cost you."
"You have all my M&Ms!"
"Okay..." He thought about it. "How about I'll trade you a question for a question? You ask one, I'll ask one."
"Hmmm..." Maddie pulled back, caution wrapping up her mind. "I don't know."
"Come on," he joked. "I've never had a chance to sit down with a royal in a casual atmosphere and ask my own questions." He paused and took a breath. "You can always pass...And I'll keep it off the record."
"Okay," she was leery as she took a breath in through her nose. "We'll see how it goes. How about that?"
"Okay," he laughed and leaned in; lowering his voice. "Now. What was your question?"
"The reason you're following this trip, this story...is it about them?" She nodded to the women she had the upmost respect for. "Or is it about me?" Her eyes slid back to him.
"Honestly?" He raised his eyebrows and she nodded. "I'm here for them. But my organization...they let me be here because of you."
She instantly appreciated his honesty, his bluntness with her. "Fair enough," she smiled; her eyes tightening up as she looked to him. "Okay Andrew Bradley. What's your question?"
"Hmmm..." His finger tapped at his chin as he thought it over, never really having been presented with this opportunity. "Can I ask you about your husband?"
He could see her defenses fly up, her posture changing enough that he caught it. She was much more guarded about Harry than she was about herself. But she held his eyes and nodded. "You can ask."
"Okay," he grew a bit more serious, his smile fading from his lips. "I know he's deployed in Khundu right now."
"Yes," she nodded.
"And I know that not long ago there was an accident; soldiers were hurt, one died. I know he was there and I've heard the rumors of...heroic actions..." He watched as Maddie's eyes glazed over just a bit. "I heard that they wanted to pull him from duty and that he convinced them to let him stay on, next to his men."
"You've heard a lot of things Mr. Bradley," she reached for her mug and took a sip.
"I thought we were on a first name basis?" He smiled softly.
"What's your question," she sat her mug back down. "Andrew."
"Are those things true?"
Maddie took a breath and watched him for a moment; he didn't look away from her, didn't break her gaze. He sat tall and steady and she decided to take him at his word. With half a shrug and half a nod, she sighed. "I don't know."
"Aw come on," his eyes narrowed.
"I don't," she smiled. "Not all of, it at least. I...I wasn't there. I don't know if there were heroic actions on his part and he would never tell me if there were. I wouldn't be surprised but...I don't know." She sighed. "As for him staying..." She looked down at her fingers tapping on the handle to her cup and then smiled. "That's true. He wanted to stay."
Andrew's smile tugged higher as he nodded. "I knew it."
"Yeah?" She squinted.
"I've been assigned to him on and off throughout the years. Hell of a soldier."
"So I've been told," she smiled.
"Yeah," he nodded. "I'm sure you have."
"Okay," Maddie leaned in. "My turn."
"Shoot."
"Do you like being assigned to follow royalty around? Or is it something you put up with?"
"Ha!" His head tipped back. "I'm not sure there's a right way to answer that."
"What?" She laughed lightly. "Why do you say that?"
"With all due respect ma'am," he offered a small mock salute. "You are a member of the Royal Family. If I say I like it..." He shrugged. "If I say I don't..." He waved his hand. "You know."
"Chicken," Maddie snickered.
"Wow..." He shook his head, surprised. "I had no idea you were so feisty."
"Most people don't," she shrugged and laughed. "Come on."
"Okay," he took a breath and leaned in. "When it's stuff like this; stuff like the gardens you're building in the city through The Prince's Trust. When it's your husband's deployment or work with Walking With The Wounded or William's work with Tusk...I like it. I like it a lot. I think that the work you're doing is really great stuff."
"Thank you," she smiled. "But I sense there is a but."
"But..." He chuckled. "When it's movie premieres or parades...not so much."
"See," Maddie nodded at him. "I knew you could do it."
"Okay," he sat back. "Your turn. Same question."
"Do I like being assigned to follow royalty around?" Her face twisted up in question. "Yes. I have a particular fondness for the red-headed one."
"No!" He shook his head with a laugh. "I meant...do you like it? Being a 'royal'?"
Maddie smiled; sweet and innocent and she nodded. "I love being married to my husband," she shrugged. "And whatever comes with that...I'm happy to take on."
"All the duties?"
"I mean..." She looked around the room for a moment. "Yes. This? I love this. I love the gardens, like you said. I love nearly everything I do. And I like the rest. Are there things that are strange? Sure. But that's pretty much true for everyone, don't you think?"
"I suppose," he agreed and held out the small package in his hands. "M&M?"
"Oh!" Maddie nodded, leaning in to take one. "Thank you. Now...I know that aside from this fun part of your job, you're also the managing editor for your division."
"Yes," he chuckled. "You've been reading up on me?"
"Yes," she nodded as she chewed and swallowed the M&M; there were people that made sure she was incredibly informed before she had set out on this trek. "And I couldn't help but notice that you didn't print one single article about me having an affair with Will."
Andrew's eyes flew up, his breath catching for just a second. He had never imagined that the Duchess would be so forward with him; so blunt. It shocked him for a moment. But he recovered, shaking his head and sipping his coffee. "No. We didn't."
"Why?" She studied him from across the table. "Nearly everyone else did, even the more reputable of the group alluded to something," she raised her eyebrows. "But not you. You and a few select others. I'm just...incredibly curious as to why."
"Easy," he shrugged, finishing off the last of the candy and putting the wrapper on the table in front of him. "I'm not a gossip columnist. I'm not a teenager with a blog." He sucked in a breath. "I have a Graduate degree from Oxford. I've studied with award winning journalists. I follow royalty because it's this amazing historical institution that walks the streets of London, that has beers at the same pubs as I do...I follow because I want to document history. You think I want to write something catty and crass? While your husband is at war?" He shook his head; his jaw tight and set. "No. I'm above that. I work at an organization that holds integrity at a priority and if they didn't...I wouldn't work there." He laughed at himself then, noticing how serious he had become. "Sorry. I'm not a gossip columnist. That's my answer."
"One follow up?" She pushed her luck just a bit.
"Sure," he nodded; happy to appease her.
"Do you ever...I don't know. Do you ever have something in your possession; a photo or a story and decide not to go with it...even if it would sell like crazy? Do you ever decide not to do it because you just...can't?"
He grew quiet and smiled across the table at her. "Of course. I'm a son and a brother and a husband and a former soldier and a friend and...I have a conscience. I try to exercise it occasionally."
"You want to give me an example?" She arched an eyebrow, curious if he would give in and tell her.
"No ma'am," he shook his head.
"Okay," Maddie smiled as she realized she was starting to respect this guy. "Okay. Your turn."
"Do you miss it?"
"It?" She was wide eyed and confused.
"Normal life?" He shrugged. "You have a PhD in Child Psychology. You're licensed to practice and you had quite the start to a career..."
"You've been reading up on me," Maddie cut in.
"Guilty," he laughed. "I'm just wondering...you worked hard to get where you were when you met a Prince. Do you miss it?"
Maddie smiled as her mind pulled forth Bendal, as her memories played through meeting Harry. She bit at her lip as her smile pulled even higher; loving those first flirty days. Then with total conviction, she turned back to him and shook her head. "No." She laughed at herself then, feeling a sort of ease lifting her shoulders, feeling any perceived weight of her decisions floating away. "I loved my normal life, don't get me wrong. But I love this more. Much more."
"Good," he took one long last sip of his drink and put his cup down. "Can I ask one more?"
"Sure," Maddie shrugged.
"The story is that when you met your husband in Bendal...you didn't know who he was and you ordered him to unload a truck full of food."
"Yes," she giggled at the image.
"True?"
"One hundred percent true," Maddie nodded happily. "I know it sounds crazy but there are just some places you don't expect to see certain people. That was one of them."
"Fair enough," he laughed with her. "And a final follow up..." He lifted his eyebrows and Maddie rolled her eyes. "Did he?"
"Did he what?"
"Unload the truck?"
Maddie felt her heart warm in her chest, felt her eyes dance as she remembered. "Yes. Yes. He absolutely did."
Day 106
"Maddie Sussex, Video Diary. We're finally leaving for Barneo in about thirty minutes. We were delayed for a few days for weather but things have cleared up and we're packing it up and heading out," she turned her camera to look around the now empty bedroom before turning back to herself. "To be quite honest, the team is getting restless...nothing like a little hurry to wait to bring out the spring fever," she chuckled and heard a knock at her door. "Okay. Time to go. Next time I see you, we'll be on the Polar Ice Cap! See you then!"
Day 108
There was this point, on the second day of solid skiing where the mood shifted; where everything around them settled and quieted. The team had begun the trek in jovial spirits with an abundance of laughter, jokes and even a few sing-a-longs as they pushed through those first miles, those first days.
But somewhere along the way, the frivolity settled and the focus turned inward for a while. It wasn't in a melancholy nature, nor was it mean to exclude or isolate. It was simply something that happened when five miles became ten, became twenty, became forty.
It was something that came with ease and welcome. As the laughter died down, they each slipped slowly and quietly into their own minds, into their own thoughts—drawing from inner strength and perseverance to keep going.
It was a little bit comical and quite a bit touching just how quickly something like this became personal. Though the team was there for each other; for support and guidance and a moment of comic relief, it became quite clear that an enormous part of this trek was going to be about their own individual battles.
And Maddie had them; her own individual battles.
With Harry and his choices.
With the impact of those choices.
With the press and their permanent place in her life.
With herself...more than anything.
And there were times, more often than not, when the stretch of miles grew longer and more difficult...there were times when all she could do was breathe in the cold crisp air and let her mind settle into solitude as she worked it out—mentally and physically.
Day 110
"So..." Wendy smiled at Maddie as they ate. The team had stopped for a break, taking a moment to rest, to re-energize before finishing up another long stretch. "Is it true that you're a Psychologist?"
"Mmmm..." Maddie nodded as she swallowed a sip of her water. "Yes. Sorry..." She laughed lightly and sat her bottle to the side. "I have a PhD in Clinical Psychology...I'm licensed...I've spent time in a clinic but..." She shrugged and felt her cheeks grow a little pink; more from embarrassment than from the cold. "But when I got married, I couldn't really keep doing that so..."
"Ah sure," Wendy smiled with a knowing look in her eye. "I suppose that makes sense." She took a bite of her food and thought for a moment. "I bet you were pretty good at it."
"Oh?" Maddie's eyebrows lifted. "What makes you say that?"
"You're a good listener," Wendy shrugged. "When I first came back from Afghanistan, I was assigned this therapist who was just...awful."
"Oh no," Maddie's forehead knotted as she shook her head.
"Yeah," Wendy laughed, thankful she could laugh about it at this point. "She wasn't a terrible person just...a terrible listener. I don't think she got it...or maybe she didn't want to. I don't know."
"I'm sorry to hear that," Maddie's voice dropped.
"It's okay," Wendy smiled. "I mean. It wasn't but it is now. The guy I see now is amazing. He's been in combat too, so I think that helps."
"Sure," Maddie nodded. "Truly, the relationship in the room is so important. If you find somebody you don't mesh with, you really should find somebody you do. The work is so much better."
"Absolutely," Wendy agreed and thought for a moment. "Is it true...Sorry...I was just wondering..." She stopped for a minute, trying to gauge for herself just where the line might be for Maddie, for the Duchess.
"You were wondering..." Maddie chuckled, letting off with a wave of her hand.
"I read an article about you a long time ago, probably after your engagement was announced."
"Sure," Maddie nodded.
"And I'm almost positive it said that you had been shot," her voice lowered and she looked up at Maddie almost tentatively. "Is that right? Am I remembering that wrong?"
"No," Maddie smiled with a small shake of her head. "You're not remembering that wrong. I...yes. I was."
"Wow..." Wendy wasn't sure why she was surprised; she had read it before. "When? How? I'm sorry. You don't have to answer that, I'm just incredibly curious. You weren't in the service were you?"
"No," Maddie shook her head. "And it's fine, really. You can ask about it." She waved her hand and sat back a bit as a few of the others looked up from their food, paying attention. "I was in Bendal working with Doctor's Without Borders. I was close to finishing up my contract, deciding what I was going to do next; extend another contract or...date a Prince," she rolled her eyes and a bit of laughter rounded the group. "And while the area was volatile at times, this particular night had erupted into fire and violence and I was at the hospital helping out and somebody came in with a vendetta and a gun and...I was in the wrong place..." She shrugged, her heart tugging as she thought over all of the other details that went with this story. "It was one shot and then...the shooter was taken down."
"Where were you...sorry..." Michelle smiled sheepishly. Maddie smiled and nodded to her to go ahead. They had all shared so much of them with her, so many personal stories. It was only fair for her to share too. "Where were you shot?"
"My shoulder," Maddie pointed. "There was a lot of blood and I went out pretty quick," she snapped her puffy, gloved fingers. "They had to operate and I had to wear this ridiculous sling for quite some time but all things considered...it wasn't that bad."
"Do you still have pain there?" Sheryl asked. "Any lingering issues?"
"Sometimes," Maddie nodded. "You know...when it's cold..." She snickered and they laughed. "But for the most part...no." A small moment of silence settled over them as the other teammates took it in; this thing that she shared with them. An injury inflicted, a permanent scar and reminder. Though Maddie didn't know it at the time, the group had already accepted her among them, had already taken her in. But this, knowing this about her, it deepened a bond that was already solid.
"So what did you decide?" Louise called out, breaking the silence.
"Sorry?" Maddie smiled across the group to her. "What did I decide?"
"Yeah. Did you extend the contract or date the prince?"
And the laughter drew them all back to center.
Day 113
"Maddie Sussex, Video Diary. We've been on the Polar Ice Cap for eight days. Today was..." She shook her head and looked down at her gloved hands. "Today was a hard day. Balancing has been a struggle for Michelle since the beginning but our terrain seemed to be more difficult today. Sheryl has more issues when it's cold and...Wendy, the spots where she has shrapnel aches in high and low temperatures. It was incredibly cold here today with winds whipping us around...off our feet at some point. We had to stop and set up camp and get in from the wind. It's been...an exhausting day by all accounts." Maddie took a deep breath and smiled. "But spirits are high and not once has anyone talked of giving up. So...things are good. Here on the Polar Ice Cap, further North than really anyone in the world...things are good."
Maddie clicked off her camera and laid back on her pillow. The wind howled outside the tent as she looked up at the bright red fabric bending and rising and fluttering. They had had a long, hard, rough day of it. The wind had been pushing against them since they set out in it that morning. It had been a battle the entire sixteen miles they had pushed before the guides had ultimately decided to set up and hunker down. There had actually been a few relatively big scares when the wind pushed Sheryl from her feet, when Michelle nearly went into the water. The guides called it a day and told everyone to go to their tents, to stay put and stay warm and get some rest.
While the guides and the crew tended to Sheryl and Michelle, their focus on making them more comfortable and getting everyone settled, Maddie, like the others, had done as instructed. She had done all that she could do before she was asked to step aside. So she did; allowing the professionals to do what they needed to do.
Though it was still bright outside, it was later in the night and she was beginning to feel the exhaustive work they had been doing catch up with her. Shaking her head, she slipped into her sleeping bag and reached for her ipod. Putting the buds into her ear, she laid back and closed her eyes and as Harry's warm, deep voice lulled her to sleep, she realized that she was quite possibly the luckiest woman on the face of the earth.
Day 115
As cheesy as it sounded, even in her own head, the day after their lowest point, each and every one of them woke up rested, refreshed and ready to hit it again.
It was nothing but wide smiles, good mornings, words of encouragement and a few well timed and well humored pats on the ass.
That was the beginning and end of it all really—the entire point—the unshakable and impenetrable resiliency of these amazing women; Michelle, Sheryl, Wendy, Louise.
They pulled it together. And had their most productive day of the entire trip.
Day 117
The interview with Andrew Bradley had gone remarkably well. Maddie had known it was coming. Though she had been answering random questions on camera for him throughout the entire trek, she had known there would come a point where he would corner off time to speak with her—just as he had the others.
Day 117 was her turn.
He had asked her all the right questions; her interest in wounded soldiers, her past work with military families, her service in Bendal. He had asked about her husband but all in the context of the trek, of his military work, of his own journey with Walking With The Wounded.
He had hit all of the main points and Maddie had answered very well; she was prepared for this and incredibly passionate about it. And it showed.
But it was at the very end of the interview, just after she finished telling him how amazing these women were; how strong and resilient and stubborn and funny and brave they all were. It was at the very end that he managed to make her teary, that he managed to choke her up.
"Now Your Royal Highness, you've said some really wonderful things about your teammates," Andrew smiled at her from his spot behind the camera. "Which is an easy thing to do since they are some really wonderful women."
"Yes they are," Maddie agreed, smiling as she watched him; wondering where he was headed.
"And I thought you might like to know some of the things they've had to say about you," he watched as her eyes flickered, as her smiled pulsed as though there was a small part of her that wanted to shake her head and tell him no. But he was quick to the point and ready with words. "They've said to me, throughout the trip...She's absolutely one of us. Even though she hasn't worn a uniform, she's served, she's persevered, she's recovered. Just like us." He paused for only a beat before he continued. "She's incredibly down to Earth, amazingly sweet, and somebody who I think we all feel we could talk to...about anything really." He watched as Maddie blinked, as she swallowed at the lump in her throat. "When she first signed on as Patron and agreed to do the trek, I didn't know what to think but now that she's here, now that I've met her and spent time with her, I have nothing but respect and friendship for her." He smiled as Maddie's eyes flashed to his. "In all of my conversations with the team; with the soldiers, with the guides, they have nothing but glowing things to say about you. They've used words like integrity, personable, sweet, caring, genuine, real, hilarious, easy-going..." He shook his head. "I could go on."
"No, no," Maddie shook her head softly, her lips curling into a smile, her voice small under the emotions she was feeling. "I don't know what to say to that. I'm....humbled and honored to be amongst these women. I..." She looked down at her hands for a moment and then back up at the camera. "I have so much respect and admiration for what they do, what they've done and to have such phenomenal women welcome me into their group like they've done..." She shook her head and smiled. "It's meant more to me than they'll ever know. Being a part of this...it's meant the world to me."
Day 118
As they grew closer and closer to their goal, to the North Pole, the draw to pull inward grew larger; each of them reflecting on the days that had passed, the miles they had logged, the events that had lead them there.
Maddie was no exception. It couldn't be helped. The emotions were high, the times of silence great and it was so easy to get lost in thought.
And she did.
As they skied through the mild weather that Day 118 had given them, Maddie found this to be her most introspective day so far.
She was struck by so many things; by how her body had adjusted to the temperature, how zero degrees now seemed warm to her new relative understanding of cold. She was struck by the group dynamics; how they had formed, how they had adjusted, how they now seemed to communicate so easily—at times without any words.
She was struck by how quiet it was; how peaceful.
And she was struck by how spiritual this trek had become for her; how cathartic it was proving to be; for her mind, for her soul.
As she continued on; one ski in front of the other, she turned off her ipod and she listened to the quiet around her. The swoosh of the snow, the slide of her skis, the rustle of her coat, the pants of her breath.
She listened and she watched.
Her eyes squinted beneath her sunglasses, looking past the red coat in front of her, past the skis below her. She looked out over the stark white snow, looked up at the crystal blue sky and she took in a long, steady, deep breath.
It was beautiful.
Serene and peaceful and...beautiful.
Here she was at the top of the world experiencing something that very few had the opportunity and luxury to experience with people she liked and respected.
She took another breath and felt her lungs catch; on the moment, on the weight of it all—on the fact that still, nearly one hundred miles in, she still felt like she hadn't fully committed; like she was holding something back from the experience.
Her eyes shifted, tilting up to the sky as she took another breath, as her eyes began to well up and her thoughts took her over.
Thoughts of Harry, of how close she had come to losing him, how close she was to seeing him again; how much she needed him next to her.
Thoughts of her future, of what happened next for her; personally and professionally. What was her next major venture? When would their family begin to grow?
Thoughts of her father; of how proud he would be at what she was doing, how impressed he would be by her physical fete, by her emotional growth, by what she was doing with her life, with the privilege she had been given.
Thoughts of these women who owed her nothing and had given her so much.
Day 118 had been easy and smooth and from a physical standpoint, a flawlessly executed day.
On the emotional side of things, Day 118 had brought her face to face with everything that had been buzzing around her mind, it had brought her right to the edge of it all.
Now all she needed was a slight nudge.
Day 120
"Your Royal Highness," Maddie turned towards the voice of one of the guides, her eyebrows lifting as she smiled at him.
"Yes?"
"Edwards asked me to have you go over into his tent," his voice was low, his eyes fixed on her. "He said it was important."
"Sure," Maddie nodded, tucking her hat back onto her head and turning towards the tent. They had set up camp for the night and as long as the weather held out and the terrain remained calm, they could be reaching the North Pole the next day. This fact, this light at the end of the tunnel had the group both excited and apprehensive. Maddie could feel the flutter in her stomach as she unzipped the tent and stepped inside, smiling to Edwards as she zipped it closed. "Mitchell sent me over..." She trailed off as she watched him rise to his feet, as she watched him hold his hand out to her.
As she looked down at the satellite phone in his hand.
"It's for you...Maddie..." His voice was low and soft and carried with it a sweetness that wasn't completely out of character for him, though a bit of a rarity. And she knew, she knew it in her bones. This was a very important phone call.
"For me?" She whispered, her heart thudding in her chest as he nodded and lifted it closer to her. With a deep breath and a pounding heart, Maddie took the phone from his hand and pressed the cold plastic to her ear. Her eyes squeezed shut as she exhaled. "This is Maddie."
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
When Maddie emerged from the tent, she had to stop for a moment; had to collect her footing, her balance, her mind. As she struggled with the thump of her pulse and the tears in her eyes, Andrew Bradley stepped up to her from what appeared to out of nowhere.
"I know what's going on," his voice dropped low as he stood next to her.
"Is that so?" With a blink of her eyes she tried to school her expression.
"Yes Ma'am," he nodded, folding his arms over his chest.
"Well, do tell," Maddie waved her hand encouragingly, her lips twitching into a small smile.
"First," he held up a finger. "I know we just received a satellite phone call." Maddie shrugged and began to walk. He followed along and continued. "In and of itself it's not a huge deal, right? I mean...we're close to the pole. The call could have been about weather or timing or our return flights..." He shrugged and let it sit for a minute and then he held up a second finger. "Except the phone call was for you." Her eyes flashed wide for a fraction of a second but it was just enough that he caught it. "And as smart as you are, as important as you are..." Maddie rolled her eyes. "Any of those types of phone calls don't go to you. So...it had to be personal."
"Listen..." Maddie stopped walking, her voice lowering but he kept going.
"And you would only get a personal phone call at the North Pole if something either really bad or really good happened," he held up a third finger and lowered his voice. "And the smile on your face..." He shook his head and held up a fourth. "Maddie...Is your husband back in London?"
Maddie blinked at the tears that rushed to her eyes, sucked in a breath and shook her head. "No. He's not."
"Is he..." Andrew couldn't say the words, could barely think it.
"No," she whispered.
"Then what is it?" His eyes were wide as he watched her debate in her mind what she was going to tell him, if anything.
"It's..." Maddie tried very hard to control the way her heart was pounding in her chest, tried to keep the smile from taking over her face. With a deep, steady breath, she leaned in and narrowed her eyes. "Between you and I?"
"Completely off the record," he held his hands up in the air.
"The call was..." She swallowed at the lump in her throat. "It was my father-in-law...telling me that Harry and his men have left active deployment in Khundu," she felt tears in her eyes as she spoke the words for the first time, her heart swelling in her chest as they continued to sink in as she realized that it was finally, finally over.
"But you just said..."
"They are in Greece," she whispered, her nerves trembling as she spoke. "They have a few days of decompression and then they go back to London. I'll probably beat him home but..." She let a shudder of excitement wash over her. "But he's out of the fire."
"He's out of the fire," Andrew repeated her words and mirrored her smile and it took everything Maddie had not to burst into happy tears and scream out into the arctic air just how unbelievably joyful she was.
He was home. One hundred and twenty days and Harry was home.
Day 121
In the end the emotions came full circle. As quiet as they had become, as much as they had retreated into themselves as they drew closer and closer to the Pole, when they finally spotted it; when they finally found it within their sites, they were pulled to each other.
At half a mile left, they dropped their heavy gear.
At a quarter mile left, the camera crew drew back, the guides began to slow and Maddie felt all of the restraints she had placed on herself, anything she had been holding back washed forward.
And she stopped and took it all in.
Standing off to the side, Maddie watched with frozen tears in her eyes. She watched the four soldiers draw together and in their own loud, proud voices, they counted down the feet until finally, finally they were there.
And the quiet, peaceful world around them erupted into celebration.
They were embracing and laughing and crying and when they turned to her, tugging her arm, bringing her into the celebration, she felt elated. She felt so deliriously happy and overwhelmed and better.
There were an abundance of photos snapped that day; the four veterans at the pole, the entire team at the pole, the Union Jack held up between them, the Christmas Candy that was cold and hard and shared amongst friends.
They snapped so many photos that day, one of which Harry would frame and keep on his desk until the day he died.
He was so fucking proud of her. And she was so fucking proud of what they had done; Michelle, Wendy, Sheryl, Louise.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
When the plane finally touched down in Russia, there was an audible sigh of relief and a wild round of applause. They had spent some time at the North Pole; celebrating, taking it in, reflecting. Laughing. Crying. Taking pictures; actual and mental. And then the helicopters had come in and they were whisked away.
After such a successful trek, after all of the hard work, the entire crew was ready to get to warmth; to beds and hot water and food that they didn't have to re-hydrate. And wine. Maddie imagined there would be plenty of wine passed around the hotel that looked to be their oasis for the night.
As the pilot welcomed them back to Svalbard, congratulated them on their feat, Maddie could tell he was smiling. She knew that on the other side of the short walkway from the plane to the airport was a whole host of loved ones for the other trekkers. She knew there would be signs and balloons and lots of love and hugs. And she had to admit, though only to herself, that there was a part of her—a bigger part than she would have thought—that wished she had agreed to let Kate come and meet her. But when she had asked, Maddie had refused and Kate had given in.
She took a deep breath and sat back in her seat, watching as people around her rose and filed out of the plane. She would just have to be content knowing that on the day she finally returned to London, Harry would most likely be there—having just returned from decompressing on the sands of Greece.
Maybe he would be right where she left him—on that bottom step in their entryway.
She smiled wide as she thought of him, an enormous amount of comfort settling over her knowing that he was at least out of the war zone—that he was simply sunning and drinking and smiling. She could wait two days to see him, as long as he was okay.
"Your Royal Highness..." Her eyes turned up to the voice calling to her and she smiled, snapping back from her moment.
"Andrew Bradley," she looked to see that it was her turn and with a groan she pulled herself from her seat, stepping into the aisle in front of the friend she had made out of the reporter. As they both moved forward on the plane, she chuckled. "Is it strange that I feel...a little hot right now?"
"Ha!" He laughed loudly behind her. "I think when you come from a place so rigidly cold, it's normal to find anything warmer."
"I suppose," Maddie nodded, unzipping her coat and pulling off her stocking cap; her hair only slightly mussed underneath.
"So...I know you said your husband is in Greece right now..." His voice grew softer when he slipped from journalist to friend for a moment. "Is there anyone coming to hold up a sign for you?"
"Nah," Maddie shook her head with a grin. "I wanted this to stay about them, not about me. And if somebody shows up for me..." She threw a look over her shoulder to him. "You guys shift your focus."
"Ouch..." His hand moved to his chest as they smiled their thanks to the air staff and stepped from the plane to the walkway.
"Anyway," she rolled her eyes. "I'll have my signs and my hugs at home."
"Fair enough," he stepped in line next to her.
"How about you?"
"Nah," he shook his head. "I'm at work. I'll have my signs when I get home too."
"Good," Maddie nodded and took a deep breath, the weight of the last two weeks catching up with her in the form of elation and exhaustion.
As they rounded the corner, she could see the airport. She could see the bright lights and she could see the balloons and she could hear the celebratory screams and squeals and laughter. With slightly teary eyes, she turned a wide smile to the man with the camera.
"This really is the best part, isn't it." Maddie whispered as she watched the women from the trek walk right into the arms of their loved ones; tears peaking at her own eyes.
"It really is," Andrew chuckled softly and scanned the crowd, taking it all in. And just as they stepped into the airport, his hand reached out on its own and stalled her. "Ma'am..."
"Yes?" She turned confused eyes to him. He hadn't called her that in quite some time.
With a soft expression, his smile pulled high. "Remember when you asked if I ever had something; a photo or a moment that I knew would sell like crazy but I didn't..."
"Yeah?" Her eyes narrowed.
"Well," he shrugged. "This is one of those moments."
"What do you mean?" Maddie shook her head in confusion.
"Over there." He pointed over her right shoulder with a nod. "I think maybe you know that man."
"What?" Maddie laughed as she spun around to look, to follow to where he was pointing and then she saw him.
Harry. Her Harry.
Her eyes instantly welled up and she had to wipe at them to clear her vision, so she could be sure she wasn't seeing things, so she could be sure her mind wasn't creating an image of him; playing games with her heart.
But it wasn't. It wasn't an image, it wasn't a figment of her imagination. It was him; her tall, red-headed, very real husband standing off to the side, towards the back of the room watching her as if he had been searching for water for weeks and she was the eternal spring.
The lump that rose to her throat threatened to take her down but she was having none of it. It had been too long, there had been too much that had happened in the four months since he had left her.
Nothing was going to stop her from being with him. Not the terminal full of people, not the cameras, not the reporters, and sure as hell not her own emotions.
It took her seconds, less than seconds, to cross the space between them and hurl herself into his arms and when he caught her in a hug, when he pulled her as tightly to him as he could possible get her, it was as if the air, the light, the life, rushed back into her.
"Oh my God..." Her voice was only a whisper as her tears began to fall, as her emotions rose to the surface. "Oh my God it's really you."
Harry, too choked up to speak, nodded into her neck, his eyes squeezed shut as he held her to him. He couldn't get her close enough. He had her wrapped up in him, he had her feet lifted off of the floor, he had her body pressed tight against his.
But he couldn't get her close enough.
"I thought you were in Greece," she sniffed as she pulled back to look at him, her hands sliding to the sides of his face. "I thought I wouldn't see you for days. I thought..." She shook her head as new tears tumbled from her eyes, as her whole body warmed as she looked at him. "Harry..." She croaked. "What are you doing here?"
He had to swallow twice before he could speak, he had to pull in a deep breath and call upon all of his wits but finally he blinked away his own emotions and in a voice that spoke of more steadiness than he felt in that exact moment, he smiled. "I'm putting myself in your arms."
YOU ARE READING
The Unexpected Journey-A Prince Harry Fan Fic
FanficThe Unexpected Journey is the story of a young woman who sets out on a mission and finds a surprising, royal, detour. I began writing this story on Tumblr and followed a suggestion to post it here. It's a tad fluffy, a dash dramatic, but a lot of...