Off guard

saturday ; 00:03am

I had fallen asleep with Dmitri by my side.

"Jo?"
I heard a familiar voice, but it wasn't Dmitri's.
Luca. Oh god. He'll be furious. He'll raise hell in this house. He'd kill him.

I rose suddenly, to find Luca staring down at home, disappointedly.

"Nothing happened Luca." I stated firmly, like Mother would've.

"Well you were clearly with someone. And that someone wasn't me." He mumbled. I looked to my side and realised Dmitri wasn't in sight. He'd gone. I wasn't even sure I'd see him ever again. He's the type to just disappear.

"There's a letter Jo."

"Yes, the letter your father wrote to my mother. I know."

"How do you k- oh. Dmitri told you."

"Well she is my mother."

He paused. I looked at myself in the reflection of the glass and realised how big of a mess I look. "What time is it?" I asked.

"It doesn't matter. Come with me."

I stood up and followed Luca. Funny how by the end of the week I could follow him anywhere without hesitation. What has this manor done to me?

Being so closed off from everything and everyone seemed to be driving me insane. I was doing things I would've loathed a week ago. It's this house. It's this emptiness that makes me desperate to fill any void with anything, something. Luca was that something.

Dmitri stood in the drawer my room by the fire place.

"What is going on?"
I asked.

The boys looked at each other. They knew. All they needed was to tell me. Dmitri began:

"On our first night at the greenhouse-"

"Ugh." Luca interrupted.

"I wanted to tell you something. But we never got to that."

Luca's cheeks flushed red, "And that was the same day we-"

"Anyways... I had found the letter after noticing that flower you admired. Now I know why you did so."

He thought he was such a genius. Taking pride in himself.

"Go on then." I pushed him.

"Our father and your mother were ... intimate. Remember you found articles about a miscarriage she had?"
I nodded in confusion.

"The baby survived. Our father covered it up in the papers because the child was... well... theirs. Not your father's."

I didn't underestimate mother but the thing that bothered her all these years may have been that baby.
That is why he strangled her. Mother cheated on my father and my father found out. Dmitri didn't stop there.

"I never knew my birth mother so I went out to look for her. I hated living in this house where I didn't even know who to trust. There was no family here for me. My father was always away. I hated it here."

Luca rolled his eyes.

"But in this letter it tells us which one of us, me or Luca, is that baby. That baby boy who your mother carried. So-"

"So potentially my half-brother ..."

I didn't know what to think. My mind for once was blank. Mother wants Mother. My father wasn't himself. Luca or Dmitri may be my half brothers. God... what was I supposed to think? Dmitri handed me the letter. As much as i pushes it away, he insisted I read it first, even though he's spent most of his life finding the person responsible for him and this could be the person, he let me read it.

"Nick,
You know how much I love you. This letter doesn't need to be long. I'm sorry, but I love my husband too. I may be a woman but that does not mean my heart belongs to one man. The baby, it's yours. I have conte the days, the hours, the minutes and it all matches up. It's yours. My husband will be furious. I do not know what to do. I hope you understand that this baby means so much to me. My baby boy. All i want for him is to live a normal life. A free life. To explore, to cherish, to love. I do not want this mess to lie on his shoulders. I love this baby and I love you and I love my husband and my heart is being torn apart. Please help me leave this mess. Love is such a mess. Please look after Dmitri, even when I leave him.
Your dearest,
Cassie"