His parting words to me were beautifully bittersweet but that was before everything happened. Before they became so devastating that they tore my heart and soul apart, not ever to be mended again. He told me "You know I'll always love you, right, Va...
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✨Ailed✨
The worst type of crying is the silent one. The one when everyone is asleep. The one where you feel it in your throat, and your eyes become blurry from the tears. The one where you just want to scream. The one where you have to hold your breath and grab your stomach to keep quiet. The one where you can't breath anymore. The one when you realize the person that meant the most to you, is gone.
I wake feeling a lodge in my throat, my eyes red and swollen. As I look at myself in the mirror I sigh. I look like a corpse. My skin so sickly pale, the black half circles underneath my eyes show my lack of sleep, the permanent scowl on my face. It all adds up to the nostalgia I feel. I don't know what is worse that I can't remember what happened. Or that I might not want to remember that it happened.
I make my bed and then lay down on it. Opening up a horror book. I had never been a big horror fan I was more of a romance kind of person. But now romance books just make me feel sick. Horror is now a safer option, as crazy as it sounds.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I'm almost done reading my book when Mia bursts in through my door. "Get ready we're going out tonight."
"Not tonight." I tell her, politely declining her invitation.
"But it's Sunday the night to party." She tells me darkly in disapproval.
"I don't do parties." I say blankly going back to read my book.
"Well it's not a party. Were just going to go hang out with the guys." Mia answers.
"You're going to hang out at a party?" I tell her sarcastically.
"Nope." She says with a defiant smirk. "We're going bowling."
"I suck at bowling." I warn her.
"Vanessa you are still going you like it or not." Mia says as she glares at my sweatpants and old true religion T-Shirt that I'm wearing. "Now change yourself into something that makes you look a little more civilized. And tame your hair it looks like you just got struck by lightning."
I roll my eyes as I get up from bed. I put on some skinny jeans and a nice flowy shirt. I grab the brush and pray to god that my hair manages to look decent.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
As Mia drags me out the door my stomach grumbles and I realize I've had nothing to eat all day. Mia is wearing a tight black shirt that shows a lot of cleavage paired off with ripped skinny jeans and of course black platform combat boots.
