RAIN DANCE

Three

I was barely in work on Friday; not physically but mentally. I really didn’t want to go to the party but Lizzy was so excited about it, I couldn’t say no. I was also dreading seeing Martin. Just the thought of him made my blood boil and my face scrunched up into a frown. When the day finally wound to an end, I was both relieved and sad.
I was relieved because I could go home and sad because end of Friday meant beginning of Saturday. I felt like indulging myself with some ice-cream from my favorite place but I remembered, half way to Chrisadam that I couldn’t go there anymore. That sunk my spirit some more and forced me to think of the reason why I couldn’t go there.
It had only been two days since I had spoken to Aidan and yet I felt worse than when I hadn’t spoken to him in months. I missed him. I needed him. I remembered hearing his voice, how high I felt, how my body suddenly ached for him. My heart literally hurt whenever I thought of him. How long would I keep this up? My body had to be strong enough to stand this pain so that I’d be strong enough to hold the joy he’d bring. I had to keep that hope alive.
I got to my apartment and went straight for the computer. I switched it on and I took out my marinated steak from the fridge. I went back to the computer to play some music before I made my way to the bedroom. This was my usual routine; one simple diversion could make or break my day.
I stepped into my bedroom and flicked on the light. Before I could take another step, I felt an arm slide around my waist from behind. I opened my mouth to scream but as I drew air into my lungs, another hand covered my mouth instantaneously. My body tensed up as my mind started racing with ideas of what I should do in such a situation. My weak hands tried to remove the hand that covered my mouth and that was when I decided to bite it. It would work, right? I just needed to distract him enough to run. I was preparing myself when I heard the huge mass of body behind me laugh.
It wasn’t a very loud laugh, but his body shook with the quiet chuckle he had made. And then his breath tickled my ear when he tried to shush me. It came out as a gentle breeze against my ear but I understood the sentiment. When he whispered my name and told me to relax, my heart broke into a sprint. My muscles relaxed as instructed. His grip around my waist loosened and I turned around slowly to face him as his hand fell from my face.
I looked at Aidan, into his light gorgeous eyes. He had scared the daylights out of me but all that was forgotten when I looked at him. He slowly lifted his hand. I assumed he was trying to put his index finger to his lips as a sign for me to keep quiet but his hand wasn’t even half way up when I jumped on him. He stumbled a bit when my weight hit him but he caught me perfectly.
My arms gripped around his light neck reminding me of the contrast between our skin that I’d grown to love. I buried my head on his neck silently. I only felt truly complete when his arms slid around me, pulling me closer to him. I felt so lightheaded. I thought the best word to describe that moment would be dreamlike. What I would have given to be able to freeze that hands of time.
We stayed like that for a long time. I couldn’t tell how long. Putting minutes and seconds to that moment felt impersonal. His grip didn’t loosen with time and my heart beat did not slow down either. It wasn’t until my arms started to hurt that my hold around his neck loosened and I realized that my feet were not touching the ground. I was totally in his arms. He let me go reluctantly and I stood facing him with a smile on my lips and joy in my eyes. His face was reflecting the happiness just like mine but suddenly his expression went serious.
He pointed at my purse that had fallen to the floor in the midst of the ambush. I picked it up and took out my phone. He shook his head and gestured that he wanted the whole bag. I handed it over to him all too willing and watched him hold it awkwardly in his masculine hands. Before I could find a way to ask him what he was doing or protest to his movements, he was walking out of the apartment.
I was too scared to utter a sound or even mouth a word in case Ty was listening and became aware of Aidan’s presence in my apartment. Instead, I waited for some painful minutes while he was gone. I was becoming restless and I had convinced myself to follow after him when he returned with a box in his hands.
“Hi,” he said with a smile dancing on his lips. He put the box down and looked at me.
“Where’s my purse?” I asked curiously as he walked towards me. With each step he took my heartbeat hit a higher rate.
“In the box.” He looked at the box briefly and then back to me. “He can’t hear a thing.”
By this time he was towering over me and I was sure my heart would stop out of exhaustion.
“You took me by surprise.” He said and I laughed feebly.
“I took you by surprise?” I repeated in disbelief.
He took another step towards me, disenabling me from talking further. My breathing became irregular and labored. I swallowed hard. He leaned down to lessen the gap between our faces and I stood on my toes in response.
I closed my eyes slightly so that I could watch him through my lashes. For some reason I kept expecting to wake up or for him to disappear. He smiled when his lips were just inches away from mine and my lips parted. My brain was too oxygen-deprived so I couldn’t pull my lips into a proper smile. He paused, almost hesitantly, and I felt his warm breath touch my lips. My body reacted by producing goose bumps on my skin.
His steady hands cupped my face pulling me closer to him. I was tortured enough. If he didn’t kiss me soon, my mind would shut down. My shaking hands fumbled to his waist and I grabbed his shirt, pulling him to me. How long was he going to keep me in suspense? This felt worse than our first kiss. I closed my eyes in surrender – or was that an involuntary action because I was about to pass out – trying to calm my anxious body and that was when he kissed me.
Slowly, at first. His hands kept my head from moving at all. He was in control and I liked it. One of his hands− left of right; I didn’t care− slid to my neck to pull me closer whilst the other slid to my waist. This allowed my hands to move to his neck and head. I was so caught up in the moment and I loved every second of it. Slowly, as was his intent I was lost in his arms.
Before I knew it, I was on the kitchen counter. My legs wrapped themselves instinctively around his waist, trapping him there. He was kissing me more urgently and faster, yet he was still gentle. I couldn’t believe just how much I’d been missing him. I had been lying to myself all these months. It was only at that moment that I truly realized to what extent I had missed him.
His lips finally left mine and moved to my jaw and after a while to my neck. I gasped for air. My chest felt starved of air as my heart hammered against it like it was trying to escape. I wanted more of him regardless my body’s cry. Or maybe my body was crying for more, too? I had no way of knowing, I’d never wanted anyone that way before. But I knew what I had to do right now before things got out of hand…
“Ai…Aidan” I breathed. “Stop.”
“His lips left my neck not as a sign that he was stopping but he moved them back to my lips. For another moment I forgot what I was asking off him. ‘Stop’, my mind screamed. And then I found myself wondering why I wanted him to stop. I never wanted him to stop.
“Please,” I gasped surprising myself in the process. “Stop.”
He laughed against my lips and slowed down.
“You want me to stop?” he asked his lips brushing against mine with every word, amusement in his tone. It took me a while to answer.
“Yes,” I breathed. He laughed again. He kissed me softly still.
“You’d sound more convincing if you tried to let me go.” He chuckled.
It was only then that I realized that I noticed my hands pulling his head to mine and my legs crossed tightly around his waist. I had to use all of my self-will to command my hands and legs to let go. Finally, they did. He kissed me once or was it twice, maybe three more times, before he just held me in his arms. Slowly, my heart stopped racing and my breathing returned to as normal as it could be when I was around Aidan. With my body back to normal I became aware of the hunger pains in my stomach.
I looked into his eyes and his smile knocked my breath right out of me. I touched his face slowly. I just had to make sure he was real. I traced his face with my light brown fingers and stopped at his mouth. My fingers lightly ran over his pink lips which changed from a straight form into a small smile. I smiled back and kissed him softly.
“Aidan,” I whispered, my head resting against his cheek.
“Yes, Christopher.” He answered. I giggled softly at how he remembered that silly day. My soft skin brushed lightly against his making my heart sprint again. Was there no end to the way he got my heart racing?
“I’m hungry.” I confessed stupidly. He laughed the laugh that sent my heart soaring and helped me off the counter. I’d forgotten just how short I was when I stood with him. I had managed to lose my shoes during out transition from the door to the kitchen counter.
“What are we having?” he asked as I led him to the stove. I stood frozen in thought for a while.
“How about fried rice and steak?” I asked. I turned to catch him watching me. He smiled and sat on the stool.
“Sounds great,” He said. “I didn’t know you could cook.”
“You don’t know a lot about me, remember?” I reminded him. I tried to focus on my cooking, but it was hard. I couldn’t risk burning the food when he was around. But who would blame me? With every turn I knew I could find his eyes fixed on me.
“I couldn’t find the diary.” He said after a while.
“Diaries,” I corrected him. “They’re at home. Speaking of home, how did you know I was staying here and how did you get in?”
“I’m a thief, remember?” he said jokingly but his words were laced with the truth. “It’s my job to find priceless things and make them mine.” He smiled “However, getting in was easy. You keep your spare key in the most obvious of places.” There was worry in his voice
I couldn’t help grinning as I worked. Not because of what he had said but because Aidan was in my kitchen. This wouldn’t have worked if I was still staying at home. I wanted to tell him the key was meant for Dylan but I decided against it.
I made our supper as best and fast as I could, considering that he was watching and coming over to help stir. For the first time since I’d moved in, the walls around me were echoing with laughter. By the time we sat down to eat, my ribs were aching from all the laughing.
“I know you probably don’t want to talk about work while we eat,” I said as I took a sip of my water. I don’t know how he did it but he was eating and watching me at the same time. Every time I lifted my head, which was often, he had his eyes on me.
“What about work?” he prompted when I had lost my train of thought.
“Why is Andrew still after you? Is this still about Adam?” I asked quietly. I looked at his face hoping to see if I’d upset him. He swallowed the food in his mouth and looked back at me. His poker face was flawless.
“If it was about Adam that would suggest that Andrew was actually a human with a real heart,” He paused and scoffed at his words. Slowly and thoughtfully, shook his head. “I thought it was, at first, but it’s not.”
“I don’t understand. What else could he want from you?” I was curious.
“Adam and I were like investments to him. We were his property. When Adam died,” I caught a glint of sorrow when he spoke about Adam but he hid it well. I suppose, he still thought it was a sensitive topic for me “and I left he was furious. But this is not about that. I have something he wants.”
“What is it?” the curiosity was killing me. He studied my face and looked away.
“It’s best you know less.” He said softly, trying to cover the fact that he was being dismissive.
“Aidan,” I pleaded. “Just tell me.”
“Do you ever stop testing your strength?” he said with a wry smile. “It’s like you’re always trying to carry more than you should.”
“I want to know.” I insisted, not being deterred by his comment. He sighed almost in annoyance.
“In the last job we did; Adam and I took some diamonds and plans for…” he paused “let’s just say something big. Andrew wants the plans. I don’t think he cares much about the diamonds but he’ll take them anyway.”
He saw the shock in my eyes. I had tried to imagine what kinds of things Aidan stole but nothing could have braced me for this. He smiled.
“Did you ever do bank robberies?” I asked with fascination. He let out a laugh.
“Those require a team of people. Adam and I worked just the two of us.” He explained.
“Have you done a job after Adam died?” I asked quietly.
“Do you really want to know?” there was a dare in his tone. I nodded. “Just private contracts. Nothing hectic. You were one of my employers, actually.”
I frowned and smiled. “When?”
“Your purse. The time when you were mugged?” he reminded me. I couldn’t help laughing at the memory.
“Should I be worried?” I asked. He raised an eyebrow at my words. “About you and your work?”
“Hardly dangerous. I’m good at what I do.” He boasted. I wanted to laugh but I was too worried to.
“Will you ever stop?”
“Do you want me to?” He asked searching my eyes in case I lied.
I looked into his eyes and sighed. It’s not like I worried about him getting hurt on the job. I just worried about times like these when his work probed into his personal life and threatened to tear us apart. I got up and walked around the table to where he sat. He pulled his chair out and let me sit on his lap. I sat in his arms and thought carefully through my answer. I looked at him when I was ready to speak.
“I want you to be safe. I want you to never have to leave me.” I stopped and rearranged my next sentence carefully. “I want you to accept that you’re a part of me so you can’t ever just leave me behind when things get out of hand. I can handle it too.”
“You’re unbelievable.” He said softly, kissing my shoulder. “Why can’t love be a little bit more reasonable, or responsible?”
I got up and took our empty plates to the sink. I wanted to give him time to realize that I was right.
Aidan then exercised one of his many talents; he distracted me. I washed the dishes while he dried them. When we were done we went to the bedroom. I changed into my pajamas in the bathroom after I’d taken a bath and came out to find him lying across the bed. He looked at me and smiled; my heart skipped a beat.
I could tell that this wasn’t permanent. He planning on leaving, probably the second I fell asleep. But I didn’t want to worry about that. I had him right now and that’s all that mattered. Without hesitation, I crawled next to him. He opened his arms and I snuggled in.
“Do you have to go to the party tomorrow?” he whispered against my ear. I could hear the worry in his voice.
I nodded. “Lizzy would be so disappointed.”
“I just don’t like the idea of you being so close to Ty.” He sighed and his breath tickled my face.
“Why don’t you just give him the plans?” I asked.
“It’s a bit more complicated than that. That reminds me. Can you do me a small favor?” he murmured. How could I refuse when he spoke to me so soft?!
“Sure.” His voice was so mesmerizing I’d have agreed to anything at that point.
“Can you bug your parents’ phone before you leave tomorrow?” he said carefully. I stopped breathing for a second and then groaned. Was he reading my mind? Had he asked the most impossible thing because he knew I couldn’t refuse?!
“Is it absolutely necessary?” I asked bitterly. I felt him nod, his skin touching mine in a slowly, soft graze. “If I must…” I muttered childishly.
“Thank you.” He said and kissed my forehead. I lost all annoyance.
He was determined not to ruin the visit so he quickly changed the subject and got me talking as he always did. The way he listened, you’d think there was nothing more entertaining than the sound of my voice. But I knew that wasn’t true; his voice was better than any sound in the world. We talked about everything and by the time I finally dosed off to sleep, I realized that there was no point for him to read the diaries. I had told him all the important stuff.
I woke up in an empty bed thinking I’d dreamt the whole thing with Aidan. It was so perfect and so amazing. The sun was high up in the sky. I didn’t need to know the time to know that it was around nine o’clock; the usual time I got up on Saturdays. I got out of bed to find an empty apartment, just as I had suspected. I found my purse in my wardrobe. My purse spent the night on the floor so I knew that was one sign that I hadn’t imagined Aidan.
There was a small box on the dressing table. It was the bug I was supposed to plant in my parents’ phone. There were handwritten instructions which looked simple enough to follow. The only problem was an ethical problem that required me to put a bug on my parents’ phone. My only consolation was the knowledge that they rarely used the landline.
I had a simple breakfast mainly because I didn’t have the strength to make anything fancy. I kept wondering if I should be happy or sad. I mean, I had seen Aidan but now he was gone. I had no idea when I’d see him next. What good had that one night done? Okay, maybe I was exaggerating. The previous night I’d learnt that my rain dance was working and that Aidan loved me and was doing all he could to come back to me. I was gathering clouds!
Nothing I pondered on was substantial enough to convince me that I was entitled to one emotion so I settled on being neutral. I’d spend the day neutral; neither happy nor sad; that was my brilliant plan. Whatever else would happen that day would get an apathetic attitude from me. Fair enough, it seemed.
When I got home mum and dad had just finished breakfast. It was more like brunch but they weren’t into specifics and neither was I; I was indifferent about what their meal was. Maybe I was taking this to extremes but what else could I do? I had to keep myself together because I was never fully alone thanks to the bugs in my possessions. Mum didn’t seem to mind my mood. Dad was too preoccupied with work.
I waited for mum to go to the garden before I started taking the phone apart. I didn’t have to do much. This bugging business was not as complicated as I had thought but I don’t think I’d ever be able to explain it to anyone else because I hated the idea and I had no idea what the technical terms were. I doubt that anyone could understand that ‘you put the small thingy on the big round item you find next to the grey stuffy gizmo’. I had to hand it to Aidan; he had managed to explain how to do it even to hopeless case like me.
It took a lot of pleading and whining to convince mum to let me drive myself to see Lizzy. Dad was on my side for a change but he had taken a while longer to convince for him to stand against mum. He didn’t mind the fact that I would drive to see Lizzy, what he did mind was being asked to pick a side when I faced mum. Naturally, dad would say nothing but having him there knowing that he wouldn’t say a thing in support of mum made me feel more comfortable.
I left home at around half one in the afternoon. The drive was bearable. I played my favorite songs, sang along as loud as I could and before I knew it I had arrived. It wasn’t as easy as I’m describing it but three hours alone was better than three hours being chaperoned.
Lizzy was waiting for me eager as ever when I got to her place. She was having a crisis. She couldn’t decide between the blue top Ty had seen her in four times already or the red top she hated but was totally flattering and new to Ty. That was pretty much how Lizzy’s life was revolving around lately; the jackass who had bugged my phone to catch my boyfriend!
I told her to go with the red top. Clearly, she was nuts about Ty but there was no way I was letting her end up with the crooked bounty hunter. I hadn’t come up with a plan but I was prepared to get as dirty as I needed to be.
“You seem so distant today, almost detached.” Lizzy pointed out as she got dressed and I freshened up my make-up. I almost gave myself a pat on the back.
“How so?” I played dumb. I didn’t want Lizzy to blow anything.
“I don’t know how to put it politely…” she paused “you’re not exactly a wet blanket, but more like a wet jersey.” She frowned at me.
“Don’t you dare ask me if there’s something wrong!” I said glaring at her.
“Well?” she prompted anyway.
“I wish Dylan was here.” I muttered. “Somehow I miss him.” Mainly because he didn’t dwell on what was on my mind but just worked to fix it.
“Why didn’t he come?” Lizzy asked checking herself out on the mirror and clearly liking what she was seeing.
“He has to study.” I said trying to concentrate on not messing up the mascara I was applying.
“I’m glad you guys worked things out.”
“Me too.” I gave myself one more look over before I got up. “Can we go to this party already?”
The party was quite a huge deal at Lizzy’s school. Not everyone was invited, I guess, that’s one of the reasons why it was so hyped. That and the other fact that it was at a grand hotel. I had no idea whose party it was but leave it to Lizzy to always be part of ‘The It’ crowd wherever she went.
I expected trouble at the entrance but we got in without a problem. I was just so glad that Ty wasn’t due to arrive till later on. That meant I had a few more hours to enjoy with Lizzy before Ty arrived with the saturated thunder cloud on my parade; Martin. Maybe I wasn’t handling the indifferent thing well. Lizzy was right, as always, I was past indifferent and dressed in total killjoy outfit.
There really had been no debate in the morning. It was sadness disguising itself as reasoning. I was up and beyond sad that Aidan was not there when I woke up. What good had the previous night done? I felt deceived and lonelier than before. Aidan was an excellent guy but, excluding the first few weeks we met, he had been a ghost. I was no different from a girl who had no boyfriend because she was trying to find a guy who fitted the description of her ideal man. Aidan was perfect enough but maybe the secret to his perfection was that he was never around.
I groaned and looked at a surprised Lizzy.
“I need a drink.” I said sternly. Lizzy grinned.
“Finally! The party can start!” she jumped to her feet. The pounding music almost made her inaudible. “I’ll be right back.”
I watched her leave and disappear into the growing crowd. The bass vibrated in the floor. I wanted to dance the stress away. I wouldn’t get drunk but I just wanted to have fun. I knew it would be short lived but I figured why not keep the trends of short lived joys going. There were plenty of nice looking guys but somehow I kept finding something wrong with each one just from their looks. None of them would be as good as Aidan. Lizzy returned just before I could scold myself.
“Two virgin strawberry daiquiris.” She squealed. I took one from her and started drinking. I wasn’t in a big rush so I put my half-done glass on the table. Lizzy was swaying to the music.
“You wanna dance?” I shouted as loud as I could. Obviously, it wasn’t loud enough. Lizzy’s frowned and leaned towards me. “Go dance!” I rephrased.
She looked like she giggled and downed the remaining of her daiquiri. When I turned to look for my drink I found a very handsome guy standing in front of me.
“Hi,” he shouted. I smiled and reached for my drink. I took a sip and put it back down.
“Do you want to dance?” he asked as loud as he could. I shook my head and Lizzy jumped in.
“I’d love too.” She said to him with a smile. She dragged him off to the dance floor and left me stunned. Lizzy always knew how to party.
The party was getting crowded. I could feel the temperature going up. All of a sudden I was uncomfortable. I took out all the clips in my hair, assuming that I had put them on too tight but still I was far from comfy. The heat was getting unbearable so I tried fanning myself with my hand. And suddenly I felt like I was going to puke. I stumbled my way to the nearest bathroom.
It was deserted. My hands fumbled to open the tap. It was then I realized that I wasn’t feeling nauseated. I was feeling drowsy, like I’d been drugged. I looked at my blurred expression in the mirror. Was that someone else’s reflection I was seeing in the mirror? I had to get back to Lizzy. I wasn’t going to pass out alone in some bathroom. I think I turned to leave, I’m not sure, all of a sudden everything went black…