Timeless

m.

5 May 2017

It didn't take much longer before I could hear his delicate playing. It was incredible, he was simply amazing. I had my eyes closed, focussed only on the wonderful sounds that filled my ears. I could get lost in his playing so easily. The song he was playing was so gentle, melancholic almost, it brought tears to my eyes.

Actually though, it wasn't just the song, it was the entire situation. Talking to him, making the most of our possibilities, and at the same time always remembering that it was all that we could ever do. No matter how much I wanted it, I would never be able to hear him play this gorgeous song in person, and if I was honest, that brought even more tears to my eyes.

Like every song, this beautiful song came to an end and Brian's voice filled my ears again instead. "So? What did you think?" He asked timidly.

"I loved it," I told him quietly. "It's absolutely beautiful. You really wrote that?"

"I really did," he confirmed. "You liked it?"

"I loved it," I repeated. "You're so talented... I have to admit it made me cry a little because it was so beautiful."

"I made you cry? Oh Mira, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, I promise..."

Chuckling a little, I shook my head. "Don't worry. I know you didn't mean to. I cry at a lot of random things, things that move me, you know?"

"Oh... okay. So... you cried because you liked my song so much?" He asked, sounding slightly proud.

"Yes, exactly," I confirmed. "And that's good. Because I really like it. What is it called?"

"I don't know yet," he admitted. "I need the lyrics to pick a title, the title is the last thing usually."

"I still admire your ability to write songs. I know how hard writing a good poem is."

"A poem?" He asked curiously.

"Mhm," I mumbled. "That's what writing songs is, isn't it? I try writing poems and it's tough. So I get why writing the lyrics is hard. And that's why I admire it so much."

Brian didn't say anything for a moment. "Thank you... I'm glad you get that. It's usually like that, the melody comes before the lyrics. And sometimes the lyrics I come up with are just random words to fill the spaces."

"I bet that ends in some funny results," I told him, smiling a little.

"Oh yeah," he chuckled. "It's quite fun actually. But then sometimes, once I have a source of inspiration, the words just come flowing and I can actually write song after song.."

"What do you usually write about?" I asked curiously, crossing my legs.

"Just... life. The good and the bad things, stuff that is on my mind..."

I nodded a little. "That sounds nice. That's why I write. Not poetry, but short stories, quick stuff like that. It's a good way to clear your mind."

"It really is.. Hey, can I ask you something?"

"Sure," I told him. "Go for it."

It was quiet for a moment, except for some shuffling on his end. "Can you see the stars right now?"

"Uhm..." I sat up and looked out of the window. "Well, it's London, so seeing the stars is always pretty much impossible, but I can see a few here and there. Why?"

"I'm just wondering if we're looking at the same stars... or if your night sky looks different than mine," he explained me his thoughts, painting a smile on my face.

"I think about those things a lot too... I don't know. It would be interesting to know, wouldn't it?" Even though it was pretty much pointless, I leaned against the back of my couch, letting my eyes rest on the nearly-dark sky. It was a shame that seeing stars in London was so hard.

"It certainly would be interesting, yeah.." He sighed softly. "You know what I would love to do?"

"What is that?" I asked, smiling a little. I loved talking to him so much.

"Stargazing with you... just you and me, in a field somewhere, under a blanket to keep warm... and then we'd just look at the stars..."

"Take in their beauty," I added. "I would love that... so much," I told him honestly.

"Me too," he sighed quietly. "So much..." It was silent for a moment, the empty space only being filled by the sounds of our quiet breathing. "It's pointless talking about this..."

"Yeah," I agreed, swallowing heavily. "I hate that though."

He was quick to agree. "Me too.."

Again there was silence between us, but I didn't mind.

"Hey," his quiet voice was audible again. "I have a strange question..."

"Sure," I told him. "Go ahead and ask. You know I don't mind that at all."

"Maybe... because we can't actually do that, we could fall asleep while we're still on the phone with each other? You know what I mean?"

I didn't say anything for a moment. "You mean like fall asleep with the call still going on?"

He hummed a little. "Yeah exactly... because we can't actually sleep next to each other.."

"You'd want to sleep next to me?" I asked with a smile. That was so adorable actually. Especially because I felt the same way. It was the familiar longing to be closer to each other than we could be.