Pleuvoir | Eric Coulter

Tatlumput-lima

E r i c

As soon as the door shuts, I gently press my lips against Lee's. She kisses me back with equal force, and when our lips disconnect, I feel a smile graze over my face.

"You don't know how long I've been waiting to do that." I say, embracing her close to me.

"That kiss was great and all," She says, her words slightly muffled as her face is pressed against my shirt, "But it doesn't take away the fact that you've got your arm bandaged."

I let out a small chuckle as I watch her break free from my hold, grasping my left arm and carefully inspecting it. "How did this happen?"

"It's fine," I say nonchalantly, trying to ease her worry, "Slightly grazed it a bit."

"Grazed it a bit?" She echoes my words sarcastically, "Nice. Didn't you tell me you are the strongest man in Dauntless? How can a graze cause so much blood?"

"It's all excess blood, you know."

She sighs, but her eyes are glowing with amusement now, "Yeah, sure. Come on, I'll change the bandage."

Lee leads me to the small portion of the room I had claimed as the clinic. Sitting on a nearby chair, I watch as she gets all the things she needs before settling beside me.

"Tell me everything," She says softly as she wipes my wound with a disinfectant.

"We're losing." I answer in a whisper, afraid that someone other than her will find out, "There's little chance of winning. Half of our men are dead. Our supplies haven't run out, but without a man handling them... we're fucked."

Her expression falters after my statement, and I wish that I haven't said anything. I wish that we aren't here in this terrible place, fearing for our safety. I wish that she will not have to fight for her life.

But inevitably, we chose this. We chose the warrior faction. There is nothing we can do about it.

"Have you thought of a plan?" Her hands are now trembling slightly, though I act like I don't notice it. She wraps a fresh bandage around my arm securely as she waits for my answer.

"Not a definitive one," My voice comes out tired as I say these words.

I've been planning with the rest of the higher-ups, but none of us could suggest a final plan. Our status is always changing, therefore affecting our every strategy.

"Do you need some help?" She asks, looking at me through her long eyelashes.

"Of course I do. But that doesn't take away the fact that you're here with me when you shouldn't be."

Her eyebrows raise, "Taking my words against me, huh? That's low."

I willed my features in a serious expression, "All jokes aside, Lee. Why are you here?"

"I wanted to see you."

"You can see me when all of this are over."

"I wanted to see you alive and safe and well." She sounds defeated now, "I needed to see you alive and safe and well."

A small smile grazes my face, but my feelings are still conflicted. Because of me, she's here, in danger. "You couldn't wait for me?"

"No, I couldn't," She agrees, kissing my cheeks, "I love you too much."

~

The next morning, all of us are visibly tense. It was the final day of our attack, and if we aren't successful... well, we all die. 

Karoliina is rummaging through her backpack, dressed in a similar uniform. She's been looking at her bag for quite some time now.

"What are you looking for?" I finally ask the question I've been itching to ask since seven minutes ago, "Is it important?"

Lee bites her lip in contemplation, but then she sighs, "It's fine. Are you ready to go?"

I nod, and she grabs a bag from the floor and starts walking to the Square beside me.

~

"Everybody has their weapons?" I shout to the people surrounding me. We are all grouped, waiting for the train that'll lead us to the field. I am sure that everyone is nervous. 

Who won't be? We are fighting for our lives.

When I see them give me affirmative nods, my nerves relax for the tiniest bit. I look to my side and stare at Karoliina as she ties her hair in a bun. My heart jostled at the thought of losing her.

I won't let it, I think to myself, I'll look after her.

In that moment as I wait with the others, I wished, truly wished with all my fucking might, that we will come out of this alive.