Latter Day Sinner

Chapter 8

Frank wasn't surprised when Gerard avoided him after that, but he couldn't say he wasn't disappointed. He tried, knowing he'd be unsuccessful, to contact him, but it was to no avail. One evening he even went to the Priest's house, and even though the lights were on, there was no answer.

He felt sadness and guilt bury themselves in the pit of his stomach – but not regret. How could he ever regret what had happened? Gerard's lips had been so hard and insistent on his own, the taste of his mouth so sweet. He replayed it in his mind, over and over – the way his back was shoved into the counter, the gentle moan that slipped from Gerard's lips as his weight was pressed against him. Sometimes, late at night, with his hand under the covers, Frank would let the scenario build. What if Gerard hadn't pulled away? What if he'd kissed down Frank's neck, his hands fumbling with his belt, until he finally sank to his knees and -
He never normally lasted past that thought. It was normally at that point that he'd find himself shaking and soaked, the guilt in his stomach seeming to grow, overcoming the wave of pleasure he'd just felt.

"...and she's nice and all, real sweet, but I don't think I can- Frank? Frankie, are you even listening?" Mia sighed, shaking his arm. They were at her house, sat on her floor with a box of pizza between them. Frank, unsurprisingly, hadn't been listening.

"Uh, yeah, yeah. Tina. Not sure if you and her are a thing..." he mumbled. Mia rolled her eyes and looked at him.

"You know, he's a Priest. So even if he does decide to talk to you again, there's no way you two can...y'know. Be together. It's against his vows,"

"Sorry princess, didn't realise you were a member of the clergy," he mumbled. Mia glared at him, biting aggressively on her pizza.

"No, but Google exists, Frankie. After what happened between you guys, he'd have had to confess and vow to never sin again. Which, by the way, Mr. Self-Pity, is probably why he's avoiding you. Because you tempt him," she said, glancing away. Frank paused for a moment, biting his lip. She had a point, there. If an alcoholic wanted to stay sober, they'd avoid going to bars – so a Priest trying to stay pure would avoid the object of their...desire?
Was it really that bad? Frank had assumed that his little crush had been mostly unrequited, but if Gerard was going out of his way to avoid him, it must be because his feelings were overwhelming.

"So what do I do?" he asked gently. Mia looked up from her phone and sighed, shrugging a little.

"Leave him alone, Frank. If you really care about him, just leave him alone. He's already risked a fuck ton with what he did before – he's lucky he didn't get suspended. Just... let it go,"

Frank already knew that wasn't possible. He'd had a taste and now he was hooked. He wasn't sure what it was, but he was almost certain it had to do with the fact that, in all reality, Frank couldn't have him. He was older, and he was a Priest. Those two things alone made them forbidden – and that's the part that set Frank on fire. He wanted to bend the man over a pew and make him forget everything but his name. He wanted to make a new meaning out of 'get on your knees and ask for forgiveness'. He wanted to stain everything pure about Gerard, and he wanted the older man to want it.

But it was more than even just that. Because he didn't just want to fuck him speechless – he wanted him. He wanted to hold him and kiss the tips of his fingers. He wanted to watch him undress slowly, and take in every beautiful inch of him. He wanted laughing and cuddling in bed, when both of them were sweating and panting and looking at each other like they were the only things that mattered. And Frank wanted these things so badly it hurt. He knew Mia's suggestion was smart – leave him alone. Let him be pure. But the idea of not being with him ate at him. He was selfish and stupid and he didn't care. If Gerard didn't want him, then by God, the Priest would tell him so himself.
He knew there was one time when Gerard couldn't ignore him. And maybe using a Holy time for his own purposes was a sin – but so was lust. And if he didn't get this sorted out, he was going to be lusting right up until he got delivered to Hell.