gone man » alex standall

•twenty-eight•

I've earned a lot of stares throughout the day. All that, but barely anyone would talk to me. When they did it was all like "why the hell did you think attempting to kill yourself was a good idea after Hannah did what she did?"
It made me feel guilty, I admit it. I mostly kept my head down all day.

It's 4:30, I sit on the bleachers watching our track team practice for their meet.
All I can hear is the coaches yelling and people complaining that they're too tired.
I rest my head at the top of the bleachers, closing my eyes.
I mean I guess it was a selfish thing to do, after Hannah and her damn tapes.
The faint sounds of footsteps fill my ears as they get louder. Opening my eyes, I notice Clay walking up the bleachers.

"Jensen." I call.

"Standall." He says back, sitting down next to me.

It's just awkward silence now. Yikes.

People are running past, I cheer them on and tell them to keep going.

"So..." Clay says, ruffling his hand through his hair.

I kick at a rock on the floor of the bleachers and look up at Clay.

"So I guess you've heard." Rolling my eyes, I pick up the Rock and throw it behind me.

He nods.

"Of course," I add, "Everyone knows."

The wind starts to pick up and rain clouds pile over the sun. A small sigh comes up from my throat, but I pause. I don't want to be rude.

"Sorry. I mean I just heard. It was a rumor I didn't think to be true." He says flatly.
The wind makes my book bag strap blow a little bit. I pick my book bag up, and stood up. Clay follows behind me while I walk down the steps.

"I shouldn't have come today, honestly. All I've gotten today was more homework and stares. Even got yelled at by Justin!" I drop my hands down to my sides in surrender.

Clay nods, I know he's spacing out or not paying attention to me at all.

"Bye." He says and pats my back. I hear his footsteps walk away faintly then they disappear completely.