A Second Chance

A Second Chance Part 14

The knock on the door causes panic to flare in me immediately and I am by the door pulling it open so quickly I almost barrel straight into the person behind it. Stopping short I glance up and then feel all of the air exit my lungs very suddenly and am quite aware of that fact that I probably look a little like a goldfish gaping at him. A very red in the face goldfish who is slightly irritated at the cool composure he is exuding.

"I was wrong," he says in a whisper after a while and I stare at him still unable to respond, my lungs beginning to hurt from lack of oxygen. Eventually he uses his initiative to steer me into the room and close the door behind us, shutting out prying eyes or ears.

"Why are you here Legolas?" I ask after a few more moments of silence now that I have managed to get a hold on my essential bodily functions such as breathing.

"I have spoken to Aragorn," he begins and I laugh suddenly, standing again as more anger flashes through me.

"Is that supposed to make me feel better, that you would trust what Aragorn says but nothing that I do?" I ask angrily, tears of hurt prickling in my eyes before I can stop them and so I turn away instead my hands wrapped around my middle as I try to unconsciously protect myself from further hurt.

"I have known him for many years and he has never given me reason to doubt him," he begins, his own voice with a hint of anger and hurt in it which makes me cringe inwardly, "you have changed everything, you make me feel things... you have said things, done things, you confuse me in a way I haven't been confused for nearly a thousand years," he finishes with a hint of frustration in his tone now which causes guilt to wash through me.

"I'm sorry," I whisper eventually and before I can draw breath he is in front of me.

"It is I who should apologise," he says now, his voice soft and gentle and I almost want to laugh at the absurd way we are bouncing between emotions and so instead just sit rather heavily on the bed.

"I have been so confused by what I was feeling, what was happening to me that I never stopped to think how it may be affecting you all," I say as I glance up at him looking away immediately as the look in his eye both frightens and excites me in equal measure.

"Why do you fear me so?" he asks as I flinch away from his touch slightly and I laugh a little at this although there is no humour in it.

"My past... I have not... now is not the time," I say eventually and he sighs a little too before sitting close by my side.

"You have not told me the truth of how bad your life was have you?" he asks and I shake my head, shuddering a little as the memories flitter through my mind.

"Like I said now is not the time, we have a battle to fight," I say instead.

"I am afraid it is one we shall not win," he murmurs and I look up at him in shock, I had known of course that he argued with Aragorn and doubted a little but he looks so despondent that it scares me.

"You must not say that we will win, we must win," I say urgently grabbing at his hands to try and make him see how much I meant it.
"I would implore you to go to the caves," he says instead of really responding to my comments and I smile sadly at him.

"I cannot, you know I cannot, I must... I have things I must do," I say quietly and he sighs before his hands are suddenly holding my face and, just as with Aragorn only a few days before, I am barely able to comprehend what is happening before his lips are attached to mine and lights are sparkling and dancing before my eyes. For the first time in my life I feel the fireworks and explosions I had always heard about and it terrifies me. Pulling away from him I stand quickly backing away slightly and gasping for air, needing to put distance between us and at the same time hating the feeling of being away from him for even a moment.

"Why do you fear me so tarien?" he asks as he approaches me slowly and I am struck that he is treating me the same way he would treat an injured animal in the wild.

"Because this is wrong," I say and although I am trying to keep my voice strong I am ashamed at the slight waver I hear in it.

"What could possibly be wrong about something that feels so right?" he asks in bewilderment and I feel a sting in my heart at the thought that he had felt the same as I did when we kissed.

"Because you are an elf and a prince and I am no one, literally no one, I don't exist here, I am human and I am useless, I shall probably die before this war is over and I could not... I don't know what I am... what is happening to me," I stutter out in a rush and he is holding me in his arms before I can blink and I am helpless against sagging into his warmth and safety.

"War is an uncertain thing tarien, I believe that maybe we should worry about the future when one is certain," he whispers into my hair and I snuffle a little as I bury my head further into his chest.

"I am scared," I manage after a while and he holds me tighter,

"So am I tarien, let us face it together," he says and I pull away a tiny bit and study his face for a long time before deciding that life was shit enough and I was driving myself crazy trying to do everything the right way and I guess that I don't remember reading about Legolas having a lover in any official text so I can't be messing up the story too much. Besides maybe he is right and I should think about the right now for once and worry about the consequences of this when they inevitably came back to bite me in the arse so to speak and so, I nod a tiny nod and the answering smile that crosses his face makes me feel that I would die a thousand times to see that smile directed at me again because it is the most incredible and beautiful thing I had ever seen.

"What does it mean, tarien?" I ask again and before he can tell me it is not the time I continue, "we may not last this night out I want to know," I say and he smiles again,

"It means princess," he says and I feel myself blush furiously which makes him chuckle.

"Why?" I ask knowing that I wouldn't be able to manage more than one word and just hoping he would understand my question.

"Because I feel you have never been treated like one and should be, I have failed so far to this but will do so no longer, but also because I knew you were my princess from the moment I saw you," he answers before kissing me again and I forget to breathe again as emotion overwhelms me completely. This is just too surreal!
"Come on then, we have a battle to win," I say eventually my voice sounding too loud to my own ears as I take his hand and try to ignore the sparks that seem to fly across my skin as I do so. I do not understand anything that is happening to me at the moment and hadn't done since I arrived really. What I did know though was that the feelings that were being evoked in me, and apparently Legolas, terrified me and I had a horrible feeling that not all had been revealed to me yet. As we walk hand in hand towards the battlements and where the elves are gathering, he had explained this to me on the way despite the fact that I already knew but I let him anyway so deep was I in thought because it is as he is speaking that I am reminded of Galadriel's words, I have power I am yet to discover, what the bloody hell does it all mean?

"Stay close to me tarien," Legolas whispers as we take our positions and I nod as I watch the swarm of black move towards us like a sea of death edging closer. I tune out what he is saying to Gimli, I know that little bit of banter far too well by now and I barely notice the rain as it begins to fall. Far too soon I hear the battle cry go up and my sword is being held before me in shaking hands, everything around me fuzzy, I really hated how fear dulled my senses so. I always thought that in times of great fear or danger your senses became sharper, mine seemed to be the opposite and became instead blurry and faded, which is not good news considering they were not brilliant to start with. They soon come flying back though when the first beast looms before me, fear ripping a startled scream from my throat before it crumples to the ground an arrow in its head and Legolas standing behind it, fear on his own face. I needed to sort myself out if either of us are going to survive this I realise and so gulping I nod at him quickly throwing myself into battle before I can think about it and talk myself out of it.